# Update on Jerry



## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

I've had a pretty rough few weeks dealing with Jerry. As some of you will remember, he has been in the hopsital 3 times (now 4 times) since Thanksgiving dealing with pneumonia. Since a lot of the infection is caused by a virus, it's very difficult to cure and his body is having a lot of trouble fighting the pneumonia.:angry:

This time, he was admitted to the hospital on Thursday, 2/10/11 by his GP. The GP's office is next to Arrowhead Hospital in Phoenix which, imho, is the worst in the city. Jerry has been to ER there a few times and each time they've almost killed him, and he's ended up in a different hospital the next day. I told him not to go to that hospital but to go to Mayo or Scottsdale Memorial both of which have all of his records and his other doctors are certified for. Did he listen -- NO!!! :w00t::w00t: So he went into Arrowhead where they again almost kill him. I flew over on Friday morning, 2/11/11, and I came back to NM on Tuesday night, 2/15/11. On Wed morning, he called his daughter and demanded that she pick him up at the hospital -- he's checking himself out. Now he's still as sick as can be and can't walk more than about 2 ft without collapsing. Still has IVs everywhere. Daughter calls me and I call DH. He yells and hangs up. Call daughter back and tell her to ignore him for a couple of hours so that he can cool down. But instead she goes to the hospital and picks him up. Drops him at his Condo and leaves because he's yelling. Long story short and after many more calls and doctor's appointments, I fly back to Phoenix on Friday, 2/18/11 after work and have a "come to Jesus" meeting with Jerry. Check him into Mayo on Saturday morning. They tell me that he almost died because he left Arrowhead Hospital and that he's one sick boy. Stayed until Monday night and arranged for caregiver when he gets out of the hospital. :smhelp:

And of course, he's just as grouchy as can be and yelling at everyone. Fired almost every doctor, nurse, etc. that he's come into contact with. They have him on steriods which always seems to make him especially angry and frustrated.:smscare2:

After several additional tests, they found 4 different baterias which they're treating with antibiotics and several viruses which are not able to be treated with meds. They've done numerous breathing treatements which has helped and he was finally released from Mayo late Friday night, 2/25/11.

In the meantime, they have taken him off of the heart transplant list due to his age as well as his other health issues such as failing kidneys, spots on his lungs, etc. And they’ve also talked to us about hospice. :crying::crying: All of this has depressed Jerry to the max. He is doing better now that he's home (and back with Nellie, his black lab and soulmate), but I have arranged to work with hospice on care givers.

Although I love him dearly and certainly don't want anything to happen to him, I would sometimes like to "ring his neck" because he can be his own worst enemy. MEN!!!:smilie_tischkante::smilie_tischkante::smpullhair:

Thank all of you for your continued prayers, and for asking me for an update on his status. :ThankYou:


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## bonsmom (Feb 22, 2010)

Prayers,Lynn.


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## edelweiss (Apr 23, 2010)

Lynn, it really is the people we love the most who know how to wind us up! :smpullhair::smpullhair:It is probably a good thing that you are not much closer---for both of your sakes! :innocent: 
Thanks for the "lab report" :HistericalSmiley: --at least that part was positive!
We will remember you better now that we are informed!:grouphug::grouphug:
Hang in there---and hang up the phone when it starts getting hot!:smheat:


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Lynn - so sorry that all of this is going on.:smcry: Jerry's really managed to hang in there against all odds but it sounds like he's up against so much that it's overwhelming. He's just striking out at anything and anybody because he knows things are so bad. Please take care of yourself. This stress is not good for you and it just sounds like Jerry is in one of his "I'm not listening to anyone" states so realize it isn't personal...but it's so **** frustrating. :smilie_tischkante:

I know that fear of some hospitals -- it happened many times with my DHs family. The ambulance would take them to the crappy community hospital and nearly kill them because of their incompetence. But everytime someone would say to them, "Go to the good hospital" it would fall on deaf ears. :smpullhair:

I'm relieved that his daughter is there tho as I recall family there hasn't been the most responsive. But this traveling back and forth for you is so hard. Please take care and know that I'm sending love and prayers.:smootch:


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## Hunter's Mom (Dec 8, 2008)

I am so sorry to hear that Jerry is again being his own worst enemy! I can only imagine how trying it must be for you but your constant dedication to him is inspiring! hugs and prayers to the both of you!


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## harrysmom (Sep 28, 2007)

Lynn,

You have my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there.... I know how tough this is for you.

Hugs,
Debbie


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## jenniferhope423 (Jun 25, 2007)

I'm sorry that you are having to go through all of this Lynn. You and Jerry are continually in my prayers and i pray that you both receive peace and rest that you need.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Thanks for the good wishes. Actually, when Jerry is like this,I'm about the only one that CAN or WILL deal with him. It does just roll off my back, but can still be frustrating when he won't listen. 

Right now his youngest daughter (the one that has been there for him) is going through marriage counselling and it's a hard time (harder than normal) for her to deal with Dad when he's in this frame of mind.

So glad that my office is very understanding.


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## uniquelovdolce (Mar 10, 2010)

my prayers are with both u n jerry !


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

Oh Lynn, thinking of you often and praying for you and Jerry.


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## mysugarbears (Aug 13, 2007)

Lynn i'm sorry to hear about what you've been going through with Jerry. I will continue to keep him in my prayers.:grouphug:rayer::grouphug:


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

oh Lynn:bysmilie: I know how much you have on your plate, I wanted to cry when I read your post. I think Jerry is fearful that's why he's acting out so bad. Hospice might be just what you both need right now. I have a girlfriend at the RV park who is a Hospice nurse, the stories she shares with me bring tears to my eyes. My dear friend Callie used Hospice with her husband Bob,it really helped her and Bob.Lynn I know the Lord has his arms around you and Jerry, I wish there was something I could do for you both. I will continue my prayers God is mericful, I love you


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## Maisie and Me (Mar 12, 2009)

Oh you poor girl, this must be soooo difficult. I don't know if Jerry is still on steroids, but they can make some people psycotic. And even if they are weaned down it takes quite a while to get out of their system. It is a catch 22 for some because it really helps with the breathing but makes them nuts. I will keep you in my prayers as well as Jerry .


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## The A Team (Dec 1, 2005)

Boy do I know what you are talking about....Stan gets like that when he's not well...:w00t::smilie_tischkante:. Evidently you have more patience than me...:huh:

I'm sorry you have all this to deal with - it's so much!!


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## Tina (Aug 6, 2006)




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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

Oh Lynn, I'm so sorry you have so much to deal with. I know you must bo sooooo frustrated but men can be terrible patients ( well women too, of course) but over the years i've seen it be men in higher numbers who as stated are their own worst enemy. 
I tend to think it boils down to the fact they've lost control over thier lives and so understandable I guess.. frustrating but understandable!
Glad you take it with the attitude you have.. and I think you know deep down Jerry doesn't mean to be... well 'mean' about things.
Know you both are held in my prayers!
PS.. don't forget... take care of Lynn too ; )


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## yeagerbum (Apr 20, 2010)

So sorry to hear that you're going through this, Lynn :grouphug: please take good care of yourself :grouphug:


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## aprilb (Jul 9, 2010)

I'm praying for you and Jerry. Poor thing, you have so much to deal with.:grouphug:


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## heartmadeforyou (May 16, 2009)

Lynn, my prayers are with you and Jerry. Hugs.


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## mom2bijou (Oct 19, 2006)

Sweetest Lynn. I'm so sorry for all this continued hardship for you and Jerry. Jerry must be so frustrated with wanting to get better but his body is doing otherwise. I feel awful for him. He really has been such a fighter so I imagine his temper is due to not making the progress he once was. And you Lyn...you are one of the strongest women I know. You just keep trucking through no matter what life gives you. You are amazing. 

I am a big advocate for hospice. They really do wonders. Hospice was there for me and my family during my Dad's illness. They really helped us all cope and get through the difficult times.

Stay strong Lynn and know that we are all praying and thinking of you and Jerry.


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## mary-anderson (Jan 12, 2010)

Lynn, I'm so sorry Jerry and you are going throuch such a difficult time. I will praying for you and Jerry.


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## njdrake (Apr 23, 2007)

Lynn, I'm so sorry Jerry isn't do well. I hope things get better soon. You hang in there!!
sending prayers
love and hugs


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## pammy4501 (Aug 8, 2007)

In all honesty, I think Jerry is experiencing a normal reaction to losing all control over one’s own life. It isn't all that uncommon. I would heartily encourage you to both to work with a hospice team. These are wonderful people that will help you and Jerry to deal with his end of life issues. Hospice is wonderful because they will involve Jerry in choices and give him a little of his power back. Consulting with hospice is by no means a "death sentence," but rather will enable him (and you) to participate in his care. They are wonderful at easing pain, and discomfort. The emphasis is on comfort and dignity, both of which Jerry is in desperate need of right now. {{BIG HUGS}} to both of you as you go through this journey.


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## munchkn8835 (May 23, 2010)

This is a difficult time for you both. I also would recommend getting in touch with Hospice. We called them for my dad and they were wonderful. Will be praying for you all.


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## beckinwolf (Sep 2, 2008)

Hospice is a really great resource. We are working with them with my grandma right now. Our hospice nurse case worker said that we had to remember that hospice isn't about dying, its about living.


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## edelweiss (Apr 23, 2010)

Lynn, I am SO sorry. Please accept my apology! 
I did not know your situation or recognize the seriousness of it all. I don't know what I was thinking. I had no right to make light of things. Sometimes I amaze my self w/my stupidity!
I am always amazed that people say dumb things in times of other's sufferings and here I am one of them! Humility is good for all of us.
Sending love. :wub:


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## mfa (Oct 5, 2009)

Lynn, i'm so sorry you are going through all this, 
sending hugs and prayers to you both.:grouphug:


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## bellaratamaltese (May 24, 2006)

Oh lynn, i'm so sorry to hear this news! How awful for both of you.


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## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

Lynn - I'm so sorry. My own experience with hospice is brief so far, but they've really taken a load off my mind the last month by helping with my mom. I know how frustrated Jerry must be - and how very hard this is on you. My prayers are with you both.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.

Sandi -- I appreciate people making light of my situation at times. Laughter helps a lot and you probably know that I'm not always a serious person. :thumbsup: I can easily laugh at myself and even at Jerry when he's being so unreasonable. 

I used Hospice when my mother was ill and passed 6 years ago. Until then, I had no idea all of the services that they have to offer. Like many, I thought that Hospice was a place (facility) that you went to when death was close. But they are a very supportive group and have wonderful caregivers, doctors, etc. and offer so much. We are working closely with them.:thumbsup: I would encourage anyone that has someone close to them with a long term illness to contact Hospice and see about all of the services that they can/do provide.

And, yes, it is hard for Jerry to loose his independence and control. I love him so much and can't believe how much he has fought for life over these last 2 years. It's hard to believe that he's still here, but, of course, I'm glad that he is. :wub: It's always so hard to watch our loved ones have a lingering illness. I know that many have been through this as I have with both of my parents and now my DH.

Your support means so much to me.:ThankYou:


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## missiek (Jan 2, 2010)

Lynn, sweet friend, I cannot even begin to imagine why you wrecking through. I love my husband with every fiber of my being and if we were in the same situation, I don't know if I could bear it. May God be with you and Jerry during all of this and prayers be with you. :grouphug: my family worked with hospice when my Dad was dying of cancer and really, like everyone has said, hospice gave Dad some dignity and gave us a wonderful support system.


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## joyomom (Jan 13, 2008)

Sending you and Jerry many prayers and hugs. Will continue to keep you in my thoughts and on my evening rosary prayer.

Hugs, hugs, hugs


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## Dixie's Mama (Mar 19, 2008)

Lynn I'm so sorry for what both you and Jerry are going through right now. You have been and will continue to be in my heart and my prayers. Jerry too. Sending lots of hugs dear one.


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## CeeCee's Mom (Sep 14, 2006)

Lynn, I am so sorry that you are having to continue to go through this. Jerry is feeling desperate and taking it out on those closest to him.......Good luck with working through hospice, they do wonders and help take burdens off family!!!:chili:


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## Katkoota (Feb 18, 2006)

lots of more prayers coming your ways, pal (hugs)


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

thinking of you and Jerry tonight, you must feel the love going your way. God is hearing each of our prayers


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Lynn - happy that hospice is there for Jerry and to help you out. They were invaluable for my in-laws and other friends of mine. Jerry has definitely fought the good fight against all odds so I'm sure he doesn't want to accept the inevitable. I'm sending you prayers and thinking of you every day. :hugging:


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

The prayers seem to be halping as Jerry is feeling better. He is still on antibiotics and is still coughing, but he says that he's feeling better this week. 

All of your prayers have helped so much. Thank you.


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

That's great news Lynn, glad to hear this.:grouphug:


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## donnad (Aug 22, 2006)

I will continue to pray for the both of you.


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## Deborah (Jan 8, 2006)

So very sorry to have had such a terrible time. Praying for you.


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