# Partner wants a dog.. I have a malt



## TraceyTracey (Mar 15, 2010)

My partners wants his own dog, he loves my malt and she loves him but he says he wants his own dog to bond with. He sees the bond I have with mine and wants that for himself. My malt is loving towards everyone but is very loyal to me and its me that she comes to find after having fun with the family. 

He is very manly and wants a Staffordshire Bull Terrier. I have read about them and they make great pets and will get along with other dogs in the family home. They are not aggresive dogs, they are people pleasers. We would get a puppy from a show dog / UK Kennel Club line so would meet the parents etc and investigate them. Also he will take his dog to obedience classes and if it has show dog potential he may show it too. 

My malt is a sweet heart, she is no trouble and only needs telling once to correct any behaviour issues when a pup ( like tearing up toilet rolls and making sure she did her toilet outside, nothing major) she loves the company of other dogs. A Staffy will be 4 times her size... do any of you have bigger dogs ?

The immediate problems I can think of are that I might have to feed her seperately because she takes her time eating.. and perhaps her toys might get chewed up, she has little soft cuddly toys, apparently a Staffy needs toys that cannot be destroyed.

Will a stronger/ bigger dog that grows up from being a pup with a gentle smaller dog play gently with a small dog and respect that smaller dog. I have read that Staffys are gentle and loving and get along and live with peacefully with Cats, hamsters and rabbits etc.. 


What do you guys think........... :thumbsup:


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

Personally, I wish he would consider another breed.... one without a strong prey drive ... Info from the Stafforshire Bull Terrior Club of America:
Nature Of The Beast

"Although individual differences in personality exist, there are some things that you can expect to find in the personality of every Stafford. They are tough, courageous, tenacious, stubborn, curious, people-loving and comfort-loving, protective, intelligent, active, quick and agile, and possess a strong "prey drive". They are extremely "oral" youngsters and need a safe alternative to furniture, toys and clothing for their busy jaws. Staffords love to play tug-of-war and to roughhouse, but YOU must set the rules and YOU must be the boss. This is not a difficult task if you begin working with your Stafford when she is a puppy."


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## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

We had a lovely Staffordshire in obedience classes and while he was a very sweet dog he was very strong. There is no way I would ever have one of my girls engaged in play with him because of this. He wouldn't intend to hurt, simply the size and strength difference could lead to a disaster.

If you get this dog, I suggest keeping them in separate rooms or crates unless one of you is actively present (not just in the same room) to step in and stop any rough play before it goes too far.


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## bentley's Mum (Dec 27, 2007)

I think it depends on the dog and the breed - 

My husband has a boxer from a rescue - and he is sooo gentle with Bentley in so many ways. he doesn't chew on his toys, he doesn't eat bentley's food, and when they are "sniffing eachother, he will stay extra still! lol it is so funny because Bentley cannot reach his bottom, so sometimes Bruiser will lower it so he can. lol!!! LOVE the way they look out the front door together. 

To be honest, Bentley runs the house - and it is Bentley I have to watch out for that HE is not being snooty to Bruiser!  I don't think dogs really understand size, as much as they understand dominance. 

I was nervous the thought of a larger dog with a small one - but it really has worked out, Bruiser and Bentley are really sweet together.

I had to edit to make this one point, .... I do think you should really research the breeds to see what would match and also introduce them to eachother before commiting to anything. if the other dog is agrressive or has aggressive tendancies than I would never allow that. just my two cents.


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## iheartbisou (Feb 13, 2007)

I'm sure the type of dog he wants can be very nice/sweet if raised properly....but personally, I would never let a dog that size, strong or with a prey drive like that play /be around my Maltese- and never alone. That's just me though...I worry like that. It may not be intentional, but your Maltese could easily get hurt.

How big is Daisy?


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## momtoboo (Jan 30, 2006)

I just would not be able to handle that. My protective mommie instints are in overdrive when it comes to my Fluffs. I know many others feel ok about it, but I'll never allow it. It can only take a 2nd for a tragic mishap to occur, whether intended or not.


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## Ladysmom (Oct 19, 2004)

I would never have a breed with a strong prey drive in a household with a toy breed dog or cat.


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## CloudClan (Jan 31, 2007)

I'm curious if there is a reason your boyfriend wants this particular breed more than others? 

Frankly, while I have met many of these dogs over the years in obedience classes and have seen the best of what they can be as they work to please their owners, I am always on edge with my dogs around them. I am not personally on edge with them. I am happy to give them lots of attention and enjoy meeting dogs who are gentle and sweet in their interactions. However, I would not be comfortable with my Maltese around one ever. Why? Because, while every dog is individual, these dogs were bred specifically to fight other dogs. While hopefully breeders are no longer breeding them for that purpose, I would find it hard to look past something that may be hardwired in the temperament genetically. 

So, I guess I would look at the question this way: What is it that your BF loves about this breed? Is there another breed that may have most of those qualities, but does not have the very large drawback of a genetic history of dog fighting?


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## silverhaven (Sep 6, 2009)

On a side note. Neat to see you are from Jersey. I lived in Guernsey for almost 3 years and loved it there. My middle daughter was born there too.

As far as the Staffordshire Bull is concerned. I suggest you check out the Staffie forums for more opinions on how they are with small delicate dogs. We hear bull and get nervous, especially over this side of the Atlantic. The Staffordshire bull starting at only 24lbs is a fantastic family dog, loyal, dependable, sweet. My nephew has two siblings, and they are really adorable dogs.

I would really look into it thoroughly though, as although they are amazing with people and children (nanny dogs) other small dogs may be a totally different story. With their powerful jaws even playing could create an accident that would be devastating to the whole family.

It would be interesting to hear what you find out.


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## pammy4501 (Aug 8, 2007)

Nooooo....don't do it. As wonderful as they are, they can snap. I have seen it happen. You will never forgive yourself.


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## MisterFergie (May 7, 2010)

I dog-sat a mastiff years ago. It was a terrible experience and I felt bad for both. Keeping them in separate rooms meant that one was always upset and lonely, as well as being very difficult (the big dog could open doors). The mastiff was a very friendly and well behaved dog and (despite my best efforts at separation) she believed she was only "playing" with my Chihuahua when she picked my dog up. My Chihuahua, however, ended up in surgery for hours with internal bleeding and bruising. It wasn't a pleasant few months afterwards for the Chihuahua. The mastiff didn't mean harm, but the size difference meant disaster for my dog.


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## LJSquishy (Feb 27, 2008)

I have to admit that I personally would not feel comfortable having a Maltese with this particular breed, but it is a personal decision you have to make. It's not that I think all of them are bad, because they're not, but they do have that prey drive that others mentioned and things can and do happen.

If your partner is absolutely set on a larger breed, I would suggest going with a more gentle large breed dog. Regardless, though, it would not be smart to keep them together in an area unless you are literally watching them 100% of the time. Even if the larger dog is playing with your Maltese, if they mouthed just a little too hard, they could easily kill the Maltese on accident.


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## MalteseJane (Nov 21, 2004)

I would not. How much time is your partner willing to spend with that dog ? Will he feed him, train him ? It's not because that dog sounds more "manly" that he will necessarely bond with him. My niece and her ex had a mastiff because HE choose the dog. My niece got bitten a few times. He did not spend enough time with the beast and she was more less scared of it. One day the dog disappeared and they don't know what happened to it.


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## silverhaven (Sep 6, 2009)

MalteseJane said:


> I would not. How much time is your partner willing to spend with that dog ? Will he feed him, train him ? It's not because that dog sounds more "manly" that he will necessarely bond with him. My niece and her ex had a mastiff because HE choose the dog. My niece got bitten a few times. He did not spend enough time with the beast and she was more less scared of it. One day the dog disappeared and they don't know what happened to it.


Just in case you don't know the Staff Bull. This dog is only 24-32lbs. nothing like a mastiff. Is one of the safest dogs you can possibly get with children (are considered Nanny dogs) This dog is nothing like the American Pit Bull. No offence intended. Just not sure you are comparing like with like here. But!!!!! I have no idea how they are with other little dogs. It could be a really bad idea. That, I think is the issue.


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## mss (Mar 1, 2006)

On another all-pet forum I used to frequent, there was a person with several dogs of that breed. She put obedience and/or agility titles on them. Very impressive! Yet they fence-fought with her neighbors' dogs. And one day the fence didn't hold. Fortunately all the dogs survived. 

Even a non-prey-driven dog of a larger breed could hurt a Maltese. I think one of my dogs that was about twice the size of my Maltese, even though he was submissive to my Maltese, may have bumped him or knocked him up against some furniture one day while I was out. He seemed quite sore, but didn't have any broken bones, maybe just some bruising.


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## vjw (Dec 20, 2006)

Since you have a maltese, please, PLEASE don't let your partner get any type of bull terrier. In addition to the reasons listed above, any dog in the bull/pit terrier family has extremely powerful jaws. This is why they are involved in so many human fatalities when they snap and attack. Those powerful jaws could easily kill a Maltese by just playing. Also, almost all puppies go through a biting/chewing stage as puppies and this concerns me. What if the dog decides to chew on the maltese?

Another thing to think about is the liability issue of owning one of these aggressive breeds. Many insurance companies won't insure homeowners of any type of bull terrier. Within the last month a young girl I know got kicked out of her apartment just because she had a pit puppy. The apartment complex allows dogs but not any of the aggressive breeds.

Here's a link regarding the non-coverage by insurance companies: 


DOG BITE LAW - Insurance for the Dog Owner


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## Nikki's Mom (Feb 13, 2008)

There are so many breeds to choose from, why pick a breed that has a strong prey drive and such powerful jaws? IMO, it is too dangerous.


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## kathym (Aug 5, 2006)

I know this neighbor across from where i live she and her husband have one although they my be Friendly our little ones have no fear and will start to bark.Baci will growl and bark and most will take it but as my Vet said some will not ..


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## wooflife (Aug 8, 2007)

I have lived through your scenario! Your partner sounds just like my DH. He wanted a dog of his own and he wanted a manly dog. 

May I suggest a Brussels Griffon - very manly ruff and tumble dog but still small and good with kids and other dogs and will bond with your bond with your partner the way your malt bonded with you.

Let's put it this way - the construction workers building houses across the street from me all want their next dog to be a Griffon. They are just so stinkin cool!!

If your partner really wants staffordshire terrier I would work closely with a trainer to make sure the dog behaves gently around your malt.


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## poochieheaven (Nov 19, 2009)

What about adopting an adult that has either small dog or cat experience so to hopefully avoid some issues?


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## wooflife (Aug 8, 2007)

Here is a pic of my Brussels Griffon so you'll know what I'm talking about. Most of them are reddish in coat. BTW this is also a higher energy dog so they like to go for walks and even running..


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## iheartbisou (Feb 13, 2007)

I love Brussels Griffons!! I've always wondered about their personality as I've never known any personally...but they are really very adorable!


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## =supermanskivvies= (Aug 7, 2008)

I would worry a bit about the size/strength difference. I'd be more inclined to adopt an adult dog than getting a puppy, so that you know what the temperament is like and you can skip the whole hyper puppy stage.

I'm not sure how popular they are in the UK, but you may want to have him check out Boston Terriers. They're pretty small (10-25 pounds) but sturdy and kind of "manly."

Brussels Griffons are cool too. They also come in a short-haired variety (although it's rarer than the wiry haired), if he prefers a short-haired dog.


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## CloudClan (Jan 31, 2007)

=supermanskivvies= said:


> I would worry a bit about the size/strength difference. I'd be more inclined to adopt an adult dog than getting a puppy, so that you know what the temperament is like and you can skip the whole hyper puppy stage.
> 
> I'm not sure how popular they are in the UK, but you may want to have him check out Boston Terriers. They're pretty small (10-25 pounds) but sturdy and kind of "manly."


 They certainly do have the more Macho-guy look to them.











And those I know who have them adore them. I have never heard of anyone who had both Maltese and Bostons, but the size alone would be a more comfortable fit.


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## TraceyTracey (Mar 15, 2010)

Thanks Ladies for your replies, I am very grateful and I have plenty to think about now.

And I will let you know what the outcome is..... 

Thank you :thumbsup:


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## Canada (Jun 4, 2009)

The Boston Terrier looks more suited. 
Or even a MIN PIN! 

Years ago, well before we got married, DH had large Presa Canarios (also known as Canary Dogs) and I had a Maltese.
They never met!!! Talk about polar opposites!

Now that we have Maltese together, DH is thrilled with them and loves them to bits.
He didn't know that little dogs could be so much fun and so silly.

I know that every dog breed is wonderful, but we can't have them all, at the same time...


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## Canada (Jun 4, 2009)

What are the other breeds in your household?
That would be a consideration, too.

This might be a bit of a stretch, but I would be questioning if their was something bothering your partner. Like if he felt his voice wasn't being heard in the house? And wanted a "manly" dog to somehow realign the balance?

You mention that your Maltese and him aren't as bonded as they could be.
Maybe he could feed the high value treats and feed some of the meals.
Maybe you could buy her some things that reflect his taste. Like a sports jersey if he likes sports (and she likes clothes!)
My DH is very "manly", so Coco has a little mohawk, a goatee, and just as many boy clothes as girls.
I also point out the similarities that they share, such as : "Oh, look she's watching the basketball game, too!" And they sleep in the same position!

It is not "wrong" for your partner to want another dog or to like that breed. But if something is not within the best interest of your Maltese, it may not be practical.
_I would be wondering why he felt that way and the motivation behind it._

If "all it is" is that he wants a dog to bond with, there was some great suggestions here for other smaller breeds. But YOU also need to want the new dog as it will be joining the fam. Maybe you will find a breed that excites both of you and can be compatable with your Maltese.


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