# Lisa Left Eye is at the Rainbow Bridge



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

I got the best/worst call this morning. An animal control worker left me a voicemail saying she thinks she has my dog, the tags on the collar say Lisa Left Eye. Stupid me forgot to turn off the do not disturb on my phone last night. Then I called her back and she said she had bad news. 

She found Lisa on the side of Rt. 59, the very busy road we didn't think she would cross. She must have tried last night or early this morning; she was probably hungry. We were even looking in the area where she was found. She must have been nearby. 

We are completely devastated and heartbroken... but the worst part is that I left her. To go on vacation. At our dogwalker's house. Maggie's dogwalker. I TRUSTED her. I wanted her to come to our house and stay the weekend with them, as she does for Maggie and has done for us in the past. This time, she said she wanted her clients to stay at her new house since she just got married. We went over there a month ago with the dogs to check it out. Everything was fine. 

I didn't anticipate her husband not watching them closely enough to allow Lisa to get through the fence. It could have happened to anyone, but I guess I feel that when you are a dog walker for a living, you should make the ONE most important thing to be making sure the dog is safe. 

I had anxiety for months leading up to this trip, because my parents were on the trip so they couldn't watch them like they normally did. I didn't want to leave them anywhere. Now I know why. We almost didn't go to Wisconsin, I was getting such bad anxiety. Why didn't I listen to my gut? Why didn't I tell her to just come here? I even PMed Maggie asking for her advice and she said she would have made Diane come to her. Why didn't I follow suit. 

I will never forgive myself for trusting my baby with someone. Poor Lisa... she must have been so scared. We thought she might be trying to make her way home. Knowing I will never see her again.. we didn't even say a proper goodbye because she didn't let us leave Diane's. She followed us to the door. 

I am just... completely wrecked. As I type this I am sobbing, but I know you guys will understand because we are the same. These are our children. I feel like a horrible mother and a failure.


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## Summergirl73 (Sep 18, 2011)

Oh Courtney....I just cannot find the words. I am holding you so tightly in prayers. God be with you. I am so, so sorry  .


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## maggie's mommy (Mar 12, 2006)

Courtney, I'm sobbing too. I'm so, so sorry for your loss.


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## IzzysBellasMom (Jan 16, 2013)

Oh Courtney, my heart goes out to you and Sean. This is such a tragedy. No words I will say can ease your pain, please just know that I have tears in my eyes and I am saying prayers for you.


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## pippersmom (May 21, 2012)

:grouphug: Courtney I am soooooo sorry. I am crying with you as I read this and my heart is breaking for you right now. Please do not blame yourself, it was not your fault. You have used this lady before and trusted her. I just don't know what to say. My thought is that she never should have left them unattended outside.... never! Please just don't blame yourself.


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## mom2bijou (Oct 19, 2006)

Courtney, moments after I got done posting Lisa's flyer in all my maltese facebook groups I'm in I saw the news. The news none of us wanted to see. My mascara is running down my face at my desk as I write this to you. My heart breaks for you b/c I know how much pain, devastation and guilt you must be feeling. It's normal to want to blame ourselves, but you can't. It's not your fault. We will never understand why these horrible, tragic endings have to happen to our innocent fluffs. But all we can do is remember the love we gave them for the time they were with us. Know that Lisa felt true love. She will be in your memories forever, your beautiful wedding memories with her, and always in your heart. I am so so very sorry Courtney. I wish more than anything this didn't have to happen. I'll always remember what a wonderful Secret Santa was to Benny and Emma a few years ago. :wub: Wishing you strength...we are all here for you. Rest sweetly our darling Lisa.


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## Chardy (Oct 30, 2008)

I am so so so sorry... I am sobbing with you.. God had a different plan for her and she is one special angel. God Bless you---


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## kilodzul (Oct 7, 2013)

Oh Courtney. This is terrible, and I'm so so so incredibly sorry for what happened. I know no words can help you now, and I understand the guilt, but I hope that you'll be able to forgive yourself. This was not your fault. You didn't leave Lisa with stranger, this was the person you thought you can trust.
You gave Lisa so much love and care, and made her life so much better. I'm sure she was grateful for that and she wouldn't want you to beat yourself up.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sobbing with you. You'll be in my thoughts, take care!


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## sherry (Jan 4, 2013)

Courtney, I'm so, so sorry! There are no words...


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## maltese#1fan (Feb 20, 2012)

Courtney, I'm crying as I read your post. I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words.:grouphug:


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## jane and addison (Nov 1, 2012)

I am so so sorry. This is tragic news. All I could do was hug my two. Our prayers are with you.


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## Furbabies mom (Jul 25, 2011)

Oh I'm so very sorry. I know that your sadness is unbearable right now. My heart is breaking as I read the topic of your thread. Don't blame yourself , you did everything to make sure they would be safe while you were away. 
Again I'm so sorry for your loss of sweet Lisa.Praying for comfort and strength.


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## Bailey&Me (Mar 8, 2010)

Courtney, I am heartbroken for you. This is truly a nightmare. I have had you in my thoughts and prayers ever since I saw that Lisa was missing. Just in tears reading this news. This could have happened to any one of us so please do not blame yourself..you did everything right...you are a wonderful mom. Yes, we all can understand your pain and how you feel. I just cannot find the right words to express my sorrow. I am so so so sorry for your loss, Courtney.


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

I am so, so sorry for this heartbreaking news and loss of your precious Lisa. We were all praying so hard for better news and her safe return. I'm sure I will be thinking of you and Lisa for a long time and wishing you peace and hoping you find comfort in your memories.


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## eiksaa (Jun 8, 2012)

I am so sorry Courtney. I agree with everyone, please don't blame yourself. Sending you and your family lots of love. 


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## Lou's Mom (Apr 8, 2014)

Courtney - I didn't know you or Lisa but I'm so sorry - I was hoping you would find her. My heart is breaking for you.


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## zooeysmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Courtney, I'm so, so sorry. I'm crying with you right now and holding you and your family in my heart.


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## revakb2 (Sep 8, 2006)

I am so sorry. I can't even imagine what you are going through. Don't blame yourself. You did the best you could for your guys. I am so sad you have go through this. My thoughts are prayers are with you.


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Courtney - I just saw your post of this on FB and came here through the tears. It was the news none of us wanted to hear. :smcry: I know how upset you are, but as others have said, please don't blame yourself. You did everything you could, to try to make sure that Lisa was taken care of. But accidents happen -- in other's care; in our care. We know that other SM mom's have had their dogs hurt, lost or even killed by some accidental circumstances. It can happen to our two-legged or four-legged children in the snap of a finger. You did everything you could to try to ensure her safety, you did everything you could to try to find her but sometimes it's just not enough. Things happen and it was her time to be called to heaven. RIP Lisa.:wub:

I think that you were sent Left Eye Lisa, even for just this short time, to open your heart more than you could ever imagine for the future. I remember vividly when you were going to adopt her and you had so many fears of taking care of her, how Ozzie would take to her, worrying (and even freaking out a bit) about the behavior she was displaying. I remember you questioned whether she was meant for you. But you stayed the course. You took the chance, you calmed down and you gave Lisa an extraordinary life that she very well may never have had if she ended up anywhere else. Your wedding pictures are just one visual reminder of that love. You saved and changed her life and though it was short...this was the life SHE knew. The love SHE knew and the joy in this world that you showed her. We will miss her and mourn her passing but she left you knowing what true love and caring is all about. I know the emotion is too raw now, but I hope in time you'll be comforted by knowing that you made such a big difference in such a little life. :grouphug:


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## Malt Shoppe (Jul 20, 2011)

Courtney, I am so horribly sorry for this outcome. So tragic. I know you are suffering and asking yourself 'if only' as we do in times like this.
We all had hopes Lisa would be returned to you safely. Even tho we don't know each others' dogs, we all worry when something goes wrong with them.
My deepest condolences on your loss - it's hard to bear.
Hugs,


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## Daisy's Mommie (Sep 24, 2012)

May God bring you comfort as only He can... I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot begin to imagine.


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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

I came back to SM once again in hopes of finding good news and now am sobbing to find the tragic loss of little Lisa. My heart is breaking with you . 
Please don't beat yourself up... none of us can foresee the future... we do the best we can ( and you certainly did) .... your tremendous sorrow is tough enough without adding the burden of guilt upon it.


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## wkomorow (Aug 26, 2011)

Courtney,

I am so devastated to hear this news, your heart must be broken. Lisa was such a special little girl and I know that she meant everything to you, your husband and to Ozzie. There is very little I can say that can give you comfort, you must be feeling so many emotions right now - guilt, anger, fear, sadness. I can however I tell you this, this is not your fault. As careful as we are with our little ones, sometimes things just happen. The sadness that you feel with subside with time. 

You all will be in my thoughts. May your heart heal quickly. It certainly was not the outcome that I was expecting.


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## mylittleleo (Jan 23, 2014)

I am so so sorry for your loss. Lisa was such a special little dog, has touched and affected us all, and will be greatly missed. My thoughts and lots of love going out to you and your family.


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## mdbflorida (Feb 28, 2013)

Oh Courtney, I saw this on FB and I am so sad for you. I have no words to ease your pain but to let you know that accidents do happen and no matter how much we try to prevent them sometimes it just isn't in the cards. Your little one knew how much you loved her and will be guarding you from above.


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## Dominic (Nov 4, 2012)

I'm so sorry, so sad to hear this. Courtney please don't blame yourself, you are so good to them and made the decisions that seemed appropriate, it's not your fault. I wish I had something to say to help you with your loss but I don't. We are sending you lots of love. 


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## Calisi (Jul 1, 2014)

I'm so sorry, my heart goes out to you and your family during this difficult time.
May God comfort you.


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## Sylie (Apr 4, 2011)

I won't even try to come up with words more than to just say that I am very, very sorry. Lisa Left Eye had a special place in our hearts.

Fly high little Angel Lisa...you are loved.


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## fran (Dec 22, 2011)

I am soooooooooo sorry of your loss. I remember when you adopted her. RIP sweet Lisa. Losing them is never easy, but when it is a tragedy it makes the loss seem so much worse. I am crying for your family. Please don't blame yourself. I know it hard not to.


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

I'm so heartbroken to hear this..we were all praying sooo hard... It's so hard to leave them, even for a little bit. You left her with someone who took care of her before so you thought she would be ok...

I have to have in patient surgery soon and debated on having Al's folks watch our dogs, it's a 3.5 hour drive and it would entail a 2-3 night stay...

Al said we're taking them with us... He's afraid too something will happen in someone elses care... It could happen to us too but if it happened under someone elses care, it would be harder..

We did this in January when I was in for a week... took them with us to La Quinta Inn, they take dogs so we always look for them..

I'm so sorry truly, sorry...


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## ladodd (Jan 8, 2012)

Oh Courtney, my heart is so broken. There are no words to help with your grief other than we are all with you. I'd never had the pleasure of holding little Lisa, but loved her dearly. I remember when you brought her into your home. You were all lucky to have had the time together. Much love and hugs to you, Sean, and Ozzie. Rest in peace sweet baby girl.


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## littlefluffbabies (Apr 17, 2013)

Courtney, I am in tears as I read your post. I just feel sick for you.... I am so, so devastatingly sorry for your loss. I am sure that all of us here are feeling this as if it were one of our own babies.. .because it could just as easily happen to any of us. Please try not to blame yourself. You are not a bad mommy.I am certain that your little ones spirit is there with you now. Big hugs for you.


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## CloudClan (Jan 31, 2007)

I am so sorry! I know how it feels to ask the questions. Every time one of my dogs has gone to the bridge I have questioned the decisions and the circumstances leading there. But in the end, the "what ifs" are not what matter. Only the love matters. And your little girl was loved beyond measure. :heart:


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## Tanner's Mom (May 27, 2005)

Oh Courtney, I am so sorry.


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## KAG (Jun 1, 2006)

Dear Courtney,
What you and your husband are enduring is unfathomable. Like everyone, I'm crying with you. Your beautiful Lisa is in Heaven, and will always be protected by all of our babies at the Bridge. 

I wish you both peace. Please give my love to Ozzie. I'm so sorry. 
Xoxoxoxoxoxoxo


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## bailey02 (May 1, 2009)

Not the news we wanted to hear this morning. Courtney please do not blame yourself you left your babies with a person you trusted. Lisa got to experience the love of having a home and the love of her mom, dad and her brother. My prayers go out to you and your husband and to Ozzie who I am sure will miss his sister.


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## sdubose (Feb 21, 2012)

Oh my gosh! I am so sorry to hear this. There are no words. Just know I am grieving with you.


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## pammy4501 (Aug 8, 2007)

So sorry for your devastating loss. I can't imagine. It's just too sad.


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## Snowball Pie's Mommi (Oct 16, 2008)

Courtney and Sean ... I am so devastated, in tears, and heartbroken for both of you. 

We all prayed so hard for precious Lisa to return home to you safe and sound. However, now she is at The Rainbow Bridge, in Heaven. 

Courtney, you were the best mommy to Lisa. You did nothing wrong. No matter how hard we try to avoid accidents and/or bad things happening ... sometimes, unfortunately, they can still happen. 

I pray that you and Sean will be blessed with comfort and peace ... realizing what wonderful parents you were to beautiful Lisa. 

I think I shared one time ... the story of the teddy bear I brought home from a grocery store. The teddy bear had one eye missing. When I took it up to the register, the cashier wanted to replace it with another bear with two eyes. I explained that this little white bear needed a loving home too. I named the bear Sunshine ... and, she is still sitting on the daybed with a few other teddy bears. So, Courtney ... I always loved how you saw the beauty in Lisa and gave her the most loving forever home.

I wish I could take away your sorrow and pain.

My prayer is that you and Sean feel Angel Lisa's angelic spirit surround you with love, peace, and comfort. 

With love and hugs,

Marie


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

:smcry::smcry: ((((COURTNEY)))):smcry::smcry:


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## SammieMom (Nov 13, 2010)

I am so sorry to hear this. :smcry:

:grouphug:


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## lynda (Oct 11, 2005)

I am so, so sorry for your loss:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:


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## Kathleen (Aug 4, 2011)

Oh Courtney, I am so very sorry. I just cannot express how much my heart breaks for you and your husband.
Lisa was such a special girl. You gave her a wonderful home and a wonderful life.
I hope that you are okay.


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## donnad (Aug 22, 2006)

I am so very sorry. You are in my prayers and thoughts.


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## Ahag (Aug 28, 2013)

I'm so sorry for you loss. As hard as it is to accept, try to remember the good times. You gave her a fulfilled life of happiness, you showed her family, and you poured out your love. If you didn't save her from the life before, then what kind of life would that have been. She already lived a long time in a cage and you saved her from that. Because of you she had a family. She blessed you with a happy life just as you blessed her. Remember all the happy times and beautiful pictures she left you behind. One day we will see are fluff's again but for now we have to focus are energy on positive. I hope you find it in your heart to not place blame upon your shoulders. This was in no way your fault. Let your heart heal with time. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Again I am so sorry for your loss.


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## hoaloha (Jan 27, 2012)

Courtney, when I heard about this, my heart just sunk down. I had to log on to SM to tell you that I am so heartbroken for your family. I know how special Lisa was to you guys. It's not your fault!!! You gave her a life of love while she was with you. She will always remain a part of you guys. I hope time can ease the pain of her sudden loss. Many hugs to you **hug**


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## Bonnie's Mommie (Mar 2, 2006)

I'm so very, very sorry for your loss of Lisa, Courtney. Please be good to yourself though. You didn't do this. You had no control over it. Lisa could not have had a better mommy than you. She knew that.


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## StevieB (Feb 2, 2012)

Courtney I was so sad to read this on Lisa's Facebook page! I know you are heart broken but please don't beat yourself up. It was a terrible tragic accident. You gave Lisa a wonderful life and she was so happy and loved! I am keeping you in my thoughts and sending hugs to you.


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## luvsmalts (Oct 21, 2008)

This is heartbreaking I was so hoping for a happy ending. She was a special little girl who brought much happiness to your family, you gave her a good life sometimes bad things just happen. So sorry for your loss.


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## MalteseJane (Nov 21, 2004)

So sorry for your loss :grouphug::grouphug:


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## mpappie (Jun 28, 2005)

I'm so very sorry.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Courtney -- I am just heartbroken for you and Sean. Lisa was such a special baby and had been through so much in her life. But she knew love and kindness because of you. As everyone has said, it is NOT your fault. We will all mourn for precious Lisa, but we know that she is at The Bridge, running free. God needed her for his Garden.

RIP sweet Lisa. Hugs and prayers for you and Sean.


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## Madison's Mom (Dec 26, 2007)

I don't have the words to express to you how very sorry I am for your loss.


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## The A Team (Dec 1, 2005)

I can not even begin to know the pain you are going through, it's a pet owner's worst night mare. 


Please know my heart and thoughts are with you.


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

The A Team said:


> I can not even begin to know the pain you are going through, it's a pet owner's worst night mare.
> 
> 
> Please know my heart and thoughts are with you.


Absolutely , it's our greatest fear...
We feel your heart break.


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## sassy's mommy (Aug 29, 2005)

I am very sorry for your loss.


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## lydiatug (Feb 21, 2012)

How completely devastating. Courtney, you did your very best to keep her safe, please don't put the blame on yourself. I am so sorry for you and your husband, take care of each other and be glad that you gave her so much love in the time you had with her. Hugs and prayers.


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## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

Courtney, I'm endlessly sorry for your loss and send my condolences your way.
Unfortunately I can't find any words to comfort your deep grief in this moment. 

Hugs to you in this hard time.

Alexandra


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## Ann Mother (Dec 18, 2013)

So sorry for your loss. Don't blame yourself something like that could happen to any of us. While on vacation someone knocked on our cabin door my husband opened the door without first picking up Cody. He rushed out looking for me. I'd gone to the van to get something. Thank goodness some Japanese tourist caught him before he got in the road. I wish I could think of something to relieve the grief you are feeling.


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## Piccolina (Dec 25, 2009)

:crying 2::smcry:

You were more than just a pet
you were my best friend
Faithful companion
from beginning to end

With your friendly bark and wagging tail
you never showed if you ailed

Running and playing morning to night
never a mean growl or a bite

I wish you were still here right by my side
but you'll always be with me deep down inside

I gave you a home and you gave me your heart
there is no way we will ever part

The love that you showed me I'll never forget
I will love you forever; You are my Pet


Author unknown


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## MalteseObsessed (Mar 7, 2010)

I am so sorry ...so so sorry! This sadness ...sending heartfelt hugs and prayers! 


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## wkomorow (Aug 26, 2011)

Here is a poem I found on the internet:

LAST NIGHT 

I stood by your bed last night, 
I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, 
You found it hard to sleep.

I whined to you softly 
as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, 
I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, 
I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times, 
your hands reached down to me.

I was with you at the shops today, 
Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, 
I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, 
You tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, 
that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house, 
as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, 
I smiled and said " it's me."

You looked so very tired, 
and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, 
that I was standing there.

It's possible for me, 
to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, 
"I never went away."

You sat there very quietly, 
then smiled, I think you knew...
In the stillness of that evening, 
I was very close to you.

The day is over... 
I smile and watch you yawning
and say "good-night, God bless, 
I'll see you in the morning."

And when the time is right for you 
to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you 
and we'll stand, side by side.

I have so many things to show you, 
there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out...
then come home to be with me.

~Author Unknown


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## CloudClan (Jan 31, 2007)

wkomorow said:


> Here is a poem I found on the internet:
> 
> LAST NIGHT


Walter, that was beautiful. :crying:


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## Summergirl73 (Sep 18, 2011)

:crying 2::crying::crying 2:


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## chichi (Apr 12, 2007)

Courtney, I am so very,very sorry for you and Sean's loss of your precious Lisa. As everyone else I have tears in my eyes. Please don't blame yourself,though. It was not your fault. My heart and prayers are with you at this sad, sad time.


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

:crying:so touching Walter.


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## mss (Mar 1, 2006)

I'm so very sorry. :grouphug:


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## Maisie and Me (Mar 12, 2009)

Courtney, you and Sean were the best doggie parents. How many people would have welcomed Lisa into their homes and given her a wonderful life. Not many but you and Sean said yes to God's plan. Your beautiful little girl is with Him now
but your beautiful, generous heart will be Blessed. I am heartbroken for you:grouphug::grouphug:


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## Snuggle's Mom (Jan 3, 2008)

I cannot tell you just how horrible I feel right now about the loss of your precious Lisa but want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. God be with and Lisa and know in your hearts that Lisa is at Rainbow Bridge. And thank you Walter for posting that beautiful poem.


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## elly (Sep 11, 2006)

I am so very sorry.


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## Snowball Pie's Mommi (Oct 16, 2008)

wkomorow said:


> Here is a poem I found on the internet:
> 
> LAST NIGHT
> 
> ...


Thank you for sharing this, Walter. I have read this poem before and it is so beautiful. Bittersweet ... but, comforting and beautiful.


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## shellbeme (Mar 1, 2011)

I was really angry for you when I first read this so I didn't post right away. I didn't know your little Lisa but I very much enjoyed seeing her pictures and hearing about her on the forums. This hit close to home for me, I'm so sorry for all your pain.

For the record I think you're an excellent maltese mama.


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## jbh06751 (May 16, 2014)

I am so sorry for your loss. It is not your fault. We all need to give up responsibility for our babies at some point whether to a sitter, vet or another family member and this was a tragic mistake. I'm sure the sitter is devastated too. 
I don't know you but I am so saddened by this. So many on this forum can relate as we all have had the experience of worry when we have to let go of our dogs temporarily and trust someone else. All I can say is that time will blunt the pain.


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## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Anger is definitely one of our emotions right now. Guilt too. A lot of guilt. We still can't stop the tears. We both stayed home today (DH had to go to the Dr. because he scratched his cornea in the woods looking yesterday) and everything reminds us of her. Everything. I almost wish I had gone to work or somewhere else so I wouldn't be constantly reminded, but at the same time, it is comforting to be in the place she called home. 

The backyard especially reminds me of her. I keep looking for her. She loved our yard. Oftentimes, after pottying, she would just plop herself down directly in the sun. She would stay there all day if I wouldn't pick her up and put her inside when she started panting! For some reason, everytime I see a little white moth flutter by, I am reminded of her.

Everyone's posts here and on FB are very comforting right now. Out of all of this, it is comforting and hopeful to have seen such action and caring for our little girl both when she was lost and when we found out she had passed. It really is nice to know good people still exist, and care for our furry children.

The girl who found Lisa and called me is truly an earth angel. She lived in the city Lisa was lost in and was on her way to work when she saw her. Bless her for picking her up and taking her to her job at animal control and for calling me and for being so patient and caring and generous and gentle with me as I sobbed hysterically. The worst part was that I thought she had her in the shelter; that someone had brought her in, alive. 

I called her back after calming down and we made the arrangements to have her cremated and got a nice urn for her ashes, with a plaque. She recommended not coming in to see her, even for Ozzie's sake. I agreed. It turns out her fiance works at the animal hospital Lisa went to while being put up for adoption at Dog Patch, as they posted on Facebook. 

Even though we were praying for a miracle, and would have preferred to hold on to hope and keep searching, I am so grateful for closure. I couldn't handle not knowing what happened to her. I just hope it was quick and that she didn't suffer. She must have been so scared. She never, EVER tried to run at home. She would run from us in our backyard when we first got the fence, but never did she try to escape. I KNOW it was because we were not there. That is what kills me. 

Not only that, but she got out RIGHT as we were leaving our 3-hour trip to come get her. If only we had left 3 hours earlier... if only I had listened to my gut and not left them there... if only we had just stayed home, and been with them. This will haunt me forever. 

My DH is completely heartbroken. He said this is the worst day of his life. And he is an Iraq veteran. Him and Lisa had a very special bond. She would sit in his lap for hours. Ozzie didn't warm up to him at first, but Lisa loved him from day one. Ozzie is sniffing around for her, but I think he knows that she is gone and not coming back. He saw her escape and run away. 

I just I could wake up and have her snuggled against my back, like she always did, and that this nightmare would end.


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## sherry (Jan 4, 2013)

Courtney, my heart is broken for you and your DH and Ozzie. Bless his heart, he will probably start howling tomorrow. It is not your fault, we cannot keep our babies from all danger. You gave her so much love.Just know how much love your SM family has for you and yours.


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## Piccolina (Dec 25, 2009)

L........(the) Loss in unbearable:crying 2: we are all crying with you:crying:

I.........It is like losing a child:smcry:

S........She wouldn't want you to feel guilty and cry so much:no2:

A........At least you shared some loving times with her.:hugging:



Lets be thankful that Ozzie didn't run too, at least he is safe and in your arms to comfort you in this unbearable agony.:heart:





*


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## sophiesmom (Apr 21, 2006)

Oh Courtney my heart is broken for you! I will keep you in my prayers and know that Lisa is always with you, if only in spirit!


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## dntdelay (May 27, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss. I am at a loss for words. 


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

It's little comfort to know what happened true, but not knowing is much worse...
I know when Al let Amy our old blind cocker out to potty, she never left the yard, she'd potty and come right back and scratch and bark at the door.Al sat on the couch watching her through the door and fell asleep.He woke up 2 hours later...
He looked all over and woke me up. We looked all over, all day, had neighbours looking in the woods behind the house...
We went down the road, over the narrow bridge, thnking, she wouldn't cross that, she couldn't see and we had terrible traffic on that old country road...
It was beginning to rain and the storm was getting worse, we went back , riding 4 wheelers, to get the car.. saw a pizza delivery guy, lost and asking for directions. He had just come from the direction we turned around in. I asked if he saw a little black dog, he said he passed her about 15 minutes ago..we tore down the road, rain and wind, went just a little farther than where we'd turned around and she popped up, right out of the side ditch onto the road... We got up there, crying and hugging the stuffing out of Amy...
She was all kisses, she was scared too. She wondered 1½ miles away from our house, over a narrow bridge and how she didnt' get hit, and avoided other large dogs nearby and coyotes,I will never know, she must have stayed in that ditch along the road... only time she left that ditch as that narrow bridge, no edge or curb on it, she could have easily fallen off the edge into the creek...

We got home just before it started to lightening,I called Al and laid Amy on the bed, she was asleep before Al got to the phone...
The next day, we let her out to potty and stood next to her, she wanted to wonder off in the same direction again... we have no idea what she smelled, but she was sniffing the air and kept wanting to go there...

6 months later she went to the bridge, kidney failure... We got an extra 6 months with her that we could have lost..plus never knowing would have killed us...

We stay outside to watch them with them in a fenced area, to potty.., we don't trust any place is 100% secure, fences fail, critters get over and get them... any fluff parents does all they can to protect their babies, you did what you thought was safe...

It's all of us, our worst nightmare...


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## Silkmalteselover (Apr 1, 2010)

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:


Piccolina said:


> L........(the) Loss in unbearable:crying 2: we are all crying with you:crying:
> 
> I.........It is like losing a child:smcry:
> 
> ...


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## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

I am so so sorry for your loss. I have seen yesterday on Facebook that she is missing and remembered she was here on SM. I am in tears over the loss of your beautiful girl. But please, please don´t be so hard on yourself and think about what could have been


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## Sylie (Apr 4, 2011)

Oh, Courtney I have been thinking of this all day. I have been very cranky all day. When DH got home, I told him about what happened, and I told him how furious I am with that idiot who let her get out. I mean, I want to cause him pain. I want to ... I know you are bombarded with painful emotions, but I think that anger is more appropriate than guilt. I think you should let your ding bat pet sitter and her irresponsible husband know how much they have hurt you and your husband. You are not at fault...THEY ARE!!!! She should never be entrusted with a dog again. Accidents can happen, but they can be avoided with reasonable care, too.


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## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

Courtney, like many others, I am writing this through a steady stream of tears. I am so very sorry for what has happened! You were the very best doggy mom possible to Lisa (and Ozzie)! Because of you and Sean, Lisa knew love for the first time in her short life. Take comfort in knowing that you were her angels her on earth and she is now your angel while she waits at the Bridge. I feel so horrible for this - what if I'd never given you Diane's name - but we can't live our lives with what ifs.

You and Sean did everything you possibly could for Lisa - loved her, cared for her and tried very hard to keep her safe. Sometimes no matter how hard we try things go wrong. 

Hold Ozzie extra close, and feel the love he has for you. Lisa will always have a special place in your heart!


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

Courtney, it has taken me all day to finally actually write something, this whole nightmare is all to close to my heart, I have been crying all day for you and Sean and your great loss. I will never understand why things like this happen, one day when I get to heaven that's one thing of many I would like Jesus to answer. I have never shared my nightmare story with many people but for some reason I feel I am suppose to share this with you

Many years ago we had two very special fluffs they were cockapoo's, brother and sister, we got them when they were 6 weeks old, we named them Muffy and Annie. We lived in a RV, traveled the country, everywhere we went we were know as the couple with the two white dogs. We were always with Annie and Muffy, many happy years passed. One year we took our RV to my husbands brother's ranch, we were planning on spending the summer with them, the ranch was a half mile off the main road, very safe we thought.
One day my husband and his brother decided they were going into town, they ask me if I wanted to go, I had been feeling ill and decided I would stay at the RV with the fluffs, before my husband left I received a call from my daughter she needed to be with me, so I decided I would go see her, my husband told me to leave the fluffs outside, he said they would be safe, after all we were in the middle of the country and his brother's mother in law would be home. We had NEVER left our Muffy and Annie outside without us.
I remember getting in the car, I noticed Annie staring at me, it was like she was asking me to take her with me, well my heart told me to take Annie and Muffy with me, but I didn't listen to my heart, I was gone 2 hours, I drove down the drive way and noticed Annie was laying in a ball next to the road, I thought how weird that was that she was taking a nap there. This is so hard to relive this but I feel like I need to share this with you. When I got close enough I noticed she wasn't getting up, I stopped the car in front of our RV and went to Annie, someone had drove in the drive way with a tractor and had ran over my Annie, they placed her right in front of our RV like she had gone to sleep, they never even stopped and told anyone.
My heart broke that awful day, the guilt I felt for not taking them with me was something awful. I went for months hating myself for not being there for Annie, I cried everyday, I lived with the what if's for months. I would pray and never felt like God heard my prayers. One day I woke up from that nightmare, God showed me it wasn't my fault, things happen down here, bad things that we have no control over, it's as if Jesus was right beside me, I felt like he was weeping with me, he hurt because I hurt, he knew the guilt I felt and Courtney it was as if he just let me cry it out, I felt safe and felt forgiven for not being there with my Annie. Through that great loss I have learned so much, God has promised he would never leave me and he hadn't, he helped me through the great sorrow, months went by and that following July I was given my Matilda, when God takes something he ALWAYS gives something extra special back to you. My Matilda lead me to spoiled Maltese and to all the wonderful friends here, I met you here, I'm sharing my sad story with you to bring you hope for the future. We can never go back and change things but we can share our life's with others and just maybe help them. I do believe in a place like Rainbow Bridge in heaven, I do believe God has set this beautiful place there for our loved babies, they are free from pain, they have new bodies, they are happy there, one day we will meet them again.
Your precious Lisa is running free, safe, happy, just waiting for you.
I will continue my prayers for you and Sean, I wish with all my heart I could take away your pain. I am here if you ever need to talk with someone who understands.


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

Sylie said:


> Oh, Courtney I have been thinking of this all day. I have been very cranky all day. When DH got home, I told him about what happened, and I told him how furious I am with that idiot who let her get out. I mean, I want to cause him pain. I want to ... I know you are bombarded with painful emotions, but I think that anger is more appropriate than guilt. I think you should let your ding bat pet sitter and her irresponsible husband know how much they have hurt you and your husband. You are not at fault...THEY ARE!!!! She should never be entrusted with a dog again. Accidents can happen, but they can be avoided with reasonable care, too.


 Gotta agree it was her fault and her husband's too for not watching her like hawk,being a new place...


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## Barb and the boys (Oct 26, 2007)

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Lisa was so blessed to have you as her mommy.


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## =supermanskivvies= (Aug 7, 2008)

I am so incredibly sorry. I was never lucky enough to meet Lisa in person, but I have been crying on and off all day. Your little girl felt so much love while she was with you, which is the greatest gift you can ever give a dog.

I just can't believe this happened. I am so sorry.


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## socalyte (Nov 15, 2010)

I am so, so sad to hear of this horrible tragedy. Words can't even express how upset and sorry I am. My prayers are with you. Please don't beat yourself up...it was an accident and they happen. Little Lisa knew she was dearly loved and she loved you..nothing can change what a special bond you'd formed, so try to cherish the sweet memories after the sharp pain of grief begins to ease a bit.


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## Orla (Jul 5, 2009)

How devastating  I am so sorry for your loss x


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Thinking of you, Sean and Ozzie today and your little angel in heaven. :grouphug::grouphug:


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## Summergirl73 (Sep 18, 2011)

Snowbody said:


> Thinking of you, Sean and Ozzie today and your little angel in heaven. :grouphug::grouphug:


 :grouphug::smcry::grouphug:


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## Brick's Mom (Apr 19, 2014)

So very sorry for your loss


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## Sophieanne (Aug 1, 2013)

I am so sorry for your loss. I pray for your peace. Please dont blame yourself.


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## LovelyLily (Mar 26, 2013)

I am so sorry for your tragic loss. I am in tears. God bless.


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## SammieMom (Nov 13, 2010)

Fragile Circle
"We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached.
Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way.
We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan."
~Irving Townsend


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## Daisy's Mommie (Sep 24, 2012)

SammieMom said:


> Fragile Circle
> "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached.
> Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way.
> We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan."
> ...


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## maltese manica (Nov 6, 2012)

Its not your fault! I blame the babysitter as well!!!!!! My condolences to you and your family, I just feel so awful for you.


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## educ8m (May 19, 2010)

My heart hurts for you. I am so sorry for your loss. I know you are in too much shock, pain, and disbelief right now, but please don't blame yourself for going on a trip. You did everything you could to ensure that she would be well taken care of. As Sue (Snowbody) said, accidents happen in the snap of a finger to our four-legged and two-legged children. They can happen when we are there or when we're not. It's so hard to not do the "what ifs", but it will drive you crazy and prolong your healing. I know two people whose fluffs have died while they were on vacation. One was in a kennel, but the other was at her own home. We do the best we can to keep them safe, but some things are taken out of our control. It doesn't mean you weren't the best mom possible. Praying for you as your difficult journey through this grief begins. :grouphug:


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## Chardy (Oct 30, 2008)

SammieMom said:


> Fragile Circle
> "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached.
> Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way.
> We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan."
> ~Irving Townsend


Very beautiful Kandis...


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## Kathleen (Aug 4, 2011)

Courtney, just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and your husband today. 
I tossed and turned all night thinking of your sweet Lisa and how unfair life can be and how it is just an unbearable loss for you.
Please know that there are lots of us here who have never met you or Lisa, but feel that she is one of ours too. She had lots and lots of love during her lifetime, even from strangers through the internet.

Since I lost my best little buddy, Grendel, I swear that sometimes I feel his presence when I look up at the stars. I know it sounds crazy. Maybe those little white moths are telling you that Lisa will be with you forever, in your hearts, and all around you, dancing in the breeze, light and free.


Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
- Mary Elizabeth Frye


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## kd1212 (Nov 5, 2013)

I'm so so sorry. Please try not to blame yourself. It's a horrific situation-not your doing.


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

Thinking of you today.


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

Praying for you and Sean


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## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Thank you all so much for your kind and comforting words. It really means so much to me during this time. I posted an updated on today, but the format of it is really weird, not sure why... none of the normal SM options are showing up. Can any Moderators take a look?


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## zooeysmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Courtney, I continue to keep you, Sean, and Ozzie in my thoughts and prayers :crying:Sending you lots of love and hugs.


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## chicklet and simba (Mar 19, 2013)

I'm sorry to hear. Please find comfort in the memories you have of your baby.

Simba sends puppy kisses!


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## BeautifulMaltese (Dec 4, 2013)

Oh no...I am so very sorry. I haven't been on SM for a few months and this is the first post I read. My heart breaks for you, I just cannot imagine what you are feeling. It isn't your fault - the fact is we sometimes have to leave our little ones in the care of others. Prayers and hugs to you and your family...


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## minysmom (Jun 3, 2014)

Courtney, I'm still sobbing from reading your story. I am so so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.


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## damara23 (Nov 24, 2012)

I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you.


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Sending you love and comfort this weekend, Courtney. <3


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## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

Courtney, keeping you in my prayers and sending you and Sean strength and hugs.
These days must be extra hard for you. 

Alexandra


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