# I am so heart brokens and guilt ridden....



## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

I got Max in October. Since then I have been home with him and happy I was able to because the first couple of months are the most crucial. He got used to me being here and used to going everywhere with me. Perhaps not the greatest thing, maybe I spoiled him with that too much. Since, he was out with me so much, I always worried about the possibility of him getting away or getting lost, so a couple of weeks ago I put his tag on and now added his rabies tag because we needed it for him to get groomed last week, too.

Today I started my first day of class to become and alcohol/drug councelor. This morning, I gathered a box of toys for him, his big biscuit to keep him busy, a nice cushy pillow to sleep on and a magazine to tear up, because that is what he liked doing. I put him in the kitchen and put the baby gate up. Ofcourse he was upset when I was leaving. I left at 8:30 in the morning and returned before 4 pm...to find him hanging on the baby gate life less with his nose poking through one of the triangles. His name tag got caught in one of the openings and he choked to death......I feel soooo guilty. I feel so heart broken. He is in my lap right now, and I feel like he is going to wake up any minute and start licking my face like he always does, but this time he won't.

I just called the vet and they asked me to bring him in to get cremated, but I said I wanted to hold him for a while. I am crying rivers at the moment and still in shock.

Please remember to take their collars off in the house, it is deffinitely not to be taken lightly...as I learn the hard way.

I still can't believe this happened. I still can't believe he lies here lifeless.

Well, in the couple of months I had him, I can tell you he touched my life so deeply. I was suffering from major depression that even the meds were not doing the greatest of jobs lifting me out of it. As soon as I got Max, within days he did more for lifiting me out of depression that 2 strong antidepressants did....and now, I am back to grieving...grieving for him, this time....and I have no one to blame but myself.

Anyway, for obviousl reasons I won't be on this board for a while....I am going to get him ready and bring him to the vet for our last car ride together...because this only happened because he wanted to be next to me......................

I just felt like I had to spill it out on here...because my head is throbbing right now.

Thank you for listening.

~Max's mom

R.I.P. Max 8/05/05 = 1/23/06


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## triste (Aug 30, 2004)

Oh my gosh. I am so very sorry.


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## elliesmomie (Apr 9, 2005)

I am SO sorry! I don't know what else to say... I'm in tears.


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## NewMom328 (Apr 15, 2005)

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry for your loss. I cant even imagine how sad you must be feeling right now. You cant blame yourself though, you thought he was safe. You will be in my prayers. Just remember you will see him again someday.


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

OMG... I am terribly, terribly sorry for your loss and the anguish you are going through. You did the best you could do...


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## Scoobydoo (May 26, 2005)

I am so very sorry for your loss







Please don't blame yourself, you thought he would be safe and you did what you thought was right for him. I just wish there was something I could say to ease your pain right now


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## Brinkley & Neyland's Mom (Jun 14, 2004)

OMG!








I am SO sorry...I don't even know what to say.....
My heart just stopped when I read what happened.








I am just aching inside for your loss...


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## cindysilver (May 15, 2005)

This is just awful. I am so so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine how you are feeling. I am just sitting here crying and holding Jack for you. Much love.


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## Holliberry (Feb 5, 2005)

I cant believe it







omg I am so sorry. I dont know what else to say. how horribly sad. I cannot even begin to imagine. I am thinking of you


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## miko's mommy (Feb 8, 2005)

I am so sorry.







It is just so sad, but its not your fault.







I know all about feeling guilty and I know that there is nothing I can say to make you feel better. I hope that you have somebody to talk to.


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## saltymalty (Sep 14, 2004)

I am so sorry for your loss. Please don't blame yourself. I am so glad you posted your story because it may help to prevent such an accident from happening to someone else.


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## LexiAndNikkisMom (Apr 13, 2004)

OMG!!!







I'm so sorry for you loss.


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## msmagnolia (Sep 8, 2004)

I am sick to my stomach. My heart is absolutely breaking for you. I hope that you can try and let go of the guilt that you feel.....Bless your heart.


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## thinkpink (Sep 25, 2004)

I am so sorry. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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## hambys97 (Feb 25, 2005)

Your loss is just terrible! Your heart I am sure is shattered. Please realize that you did the absolute BEST that you could possibly do for your baby. You need to let go of the guilt immediately. Your baby is waiting at the rainbow bridge for you now. Thank God that he came into your life to get you out of your depression. Thank God he came and gave you back the ability to love and realize you could be loved. Please know that you have a family here all praying for you and trying to offer support in the only ways we know how...


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

MaxMommy, I can tell you that your tragic loss has hit us all very hard. I have had PMs from several people who at the present time are so distraught over this, that they cannot even post their condolences to you yet. Our hearts are breaking for what you are going through.


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## Mystify79 (Apr 6, 2004)

My heart just sank when I read your story.














I am so sorry for your loss.


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## saltymalty (Sep 14, 2004)

Our hearts are breaking for what you are going through.






















[/QUOTE]
You are so right...Please know that we are here for you....


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## yorktesemomma (Aug 2, 2005)

I am so sorry......








Jess


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## Furbaby's Mommie (Jul 10, 2004)

I am in shock! I am so sorry. Please know we are all weeping and praying for you. God be with you.


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## pompomsmom (Jan 8, 2006)

I am sooo sorry this happened. Nothing I can say will make this time easier. Stay strong, he is not hurting, he is at peace.


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## bellasmommy (May 8, 2005)

I am so sorry. Know that we are here for you.


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## gottagettamaltee (Dec 1, 2005)

oh my gosh, i am so sorry sweetie. i am just shocked right now that something so tragic could happen. i've read many of your posts and you are such a great furmommy. i am sorry that this has happened to you but know that we are all here for you. i really dont know what to say, i know that no words can defer your pain and agony right now. just know that we are here.


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## angelsmom (May 28, 2005)

I am so very sorry for you. I know how you must be feeling but it wasn't your fault. You tried your best to keep him safe.


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## kodie (Aug 24, 2004)

I am in complete shock.







I dunno what to say.. i'm speechless... I always see ur posts.... i feel like i lost something as well..... on this forum we talk about our babies and we basically get to know each of them and their mommy (daddys)... I honestly am in total shock... as i'm sure you are too. If you ever want to talk.. you know any of us are here to listen.







I am completely sorry to hear about this horrible accident. Words really cant explain how i feel... I dunno if your religious or not.. but my prayers are with you.


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## Sylphide and Shrek's Mom (Dec 4, 2004)

OMG...I am so very sorry for your tragic loss. I'm sure we all wish we could be there to comfort you in this terrible time.


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## littlepeanut (Dec 5, 2004)

I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart is breaking for you







Remember that we are all here for you if you ever need to talk







I'm so sorry, I dont' know what else to say


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## dr.jaimie (Mar 23, 2004)

im so sorry this has happened...this is not ur fault.


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## mmo (Sep 4, 2004)

Oh GOD!!! What a sad thing to happen. I am so very sorry for your loss and words can`t really express how we all feel for you at this moment. We are with you, sending prayers for your heart to heal and your guilt dissappear. This was a horrible accident, you gave your little one the best life you could and something like this is absolutely not your fault. My heart goes to you.


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## dr.jaimie (Mar 23, 2004)

double post sorry


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## MalteseJane (Nov 21, 2004)

I am so sorry.. my heart aches for you and your baby


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## micaela (Jan 7, 2006)

OMG!!!


I'm new here and this is a shock to me filled with sadness














I'm so sorry!!! I really just don't know what to say..........














I just feel like crying


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## Boobookit (Dec 3, 2005)

It took me a while to post...because my heart was breaking for you.....There is nothing that I can say that will make you feel any better, you will need time to mourn, except that I am so very sorry.

We are all here for you when you need us...just please know that you did nothing wrong. Max was an angel that was put here to help you and now God needed him home...There was a special spot just for him and that's where he is...watching over you.

he came here to help you, he brought laughter and love back into your heart when you were down and needed him and like I said God needed him now.

Now it is your turn to help another unfortunate furbaby that needs you and keep max's love strong.

I am so sorry.

Marie & pacino


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## Maltese Adora-Belle (Jan 23, 2005)

I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am that this tragic accident happened to you. This is the first post that has tears just streaming down my face and I feel sick. I can't imagine how terribly heart broken you must be. I wish there was something I could say to ease your pain. Please know that my prayers are with you, and as said before we are all here for you. Depression is an ugly illness and without my baby I know how very depressed I would be. I too am on anti-depressants but these babies are truly a gift from God. I do believe God will send you another baby to love when the time is right and Max will be watching over you and being happy for you.


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## Puddles Mom (Jun 20, 2004)

I'm so sorry, my heart goes out to you.


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## lynda (Oct 11, 2005)

It was very courageous of you to let us know what happened when you are in so much pain and to warn us of the silent dangers that could affect any of us at any time. Though you cannot help your fur baby I am sure you have helped many others with your unselfish words of warning at such a difficult time.

May you find peace and comfort knowing that others care.

Lynda


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## puppylucy (Jan 8, 2005)

OMG.. i just read this and i don't know what to say

i am so, so, so sorry. this is completely unfair and shouldn't have happened to you.. but it is not your fault and you must never think that.

again.. i'm sorry


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## kab (Apr 11, 2005)

I just read this and I am in total shock. I wish there was something I could say to help. I am so very, very sorry for your loss.


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## Teddyandme (Feb 6, 2005)

MaxMommy,

I am so very sorry that your little angel was taken in such a horrific way. Your heart must be in a thousand pieces right now...but know that he is up in heaven right this very moment because God needed him for something. He is helping someone.

Please know that my prayers are with you and Max for his speedy transition to the other side. 

I pray that you will not blame yourself for this terrible terrible accident. Please don't cut yourself off of this site just yet...as you know we are family here and you need us at the moment. I know it will be hard for you but come and let us help you. 

Please know that we all thought you were a wonderful furmommy.

Susan


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## joe (Jan 5, 2003)

i am so sorry to hear this, it truely breaks my heart, my thoughts and prayers are with you, please dont blame yourself, please, you did what you thought best and that is all that any of us can do, Max knows that, find peace in that if nothing else


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## Haven (Sep 22, 2005)

OMG
Reading this has brought me to tears
I am so sorry about your loss.
((((((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))


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## Bijousmom (May 29, 2005)

Mersada, words can't express how sorry I am for your loss.







You can't blame yourself for this horrible tragedy. Depression causes you to be harder on yourself than anyone else could possibly be. I know this because I also have had gone into depression for months at a time. We all care about you very much so please get the help that you need. Please take care of yourself.







Julia


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

Thank you for all your kind words, they helped me release alot of the grief I am feeling, right now. I dropped him off, it was one of the hardest things I had to do.

You know I was thinking the same thing some of you said. The first time I experienced tragedy was losing my mom in a car crash at age 15. Developed severe depression a few years ago and was unable to kick it for the past few years. It got so bad (major depression) that I was having delusions. I was put on Meds last year, they hardly helped. 450 mg of Welbutrin and 120 of Lexapro...medeocre results. The minute my little angel came into my life...I felt better than I have in 5 years. Something about constantly hugging and kissing him...and him making me laugh with his little bratty ways...just pulled me out of depression 100 times better than the meds. I was blessed with him.

YOu are right, God sent him with a mission to cure my soul and show me how love feels again. That mommy child love that I lost at a young age, I felt it with him. And yes, this little angel was sent on his little mission and had to go, he deffinitely earned his wings. Since I had him, such a short time....he brought cheer to 2 people out there who had lost their pups...so it wasn't only me he brought joy to. 

I didn't want him to run loose in the house, because he liked chewing wires...who would have expected this...but, you are right....God gave him his mission on earth and now his time was up and he did such a tremendous job while he was here.

I took his dog tags and attached them to a favorite shell bracelet of mine that he stole from me and loved to shake against the rug to make it rattle....I took the bracelet and attached his tags and hung it over the kitchen door frame where I found him.

I have been listening to this song over and over and thinking of him....I was listening to it this morning before I left him here....and the words fit my memory of him so perfectly:
(thank you all for your kind words, i feel so lost, right now)

CELINE DION LYRICS

"The Reason"

I figured it out
I was high and low and everything in between
I was wicked and wild, baby, you know what I mean
Till there was you, yeah, you

Something went wrong
I made a deal with the devil for an empty I.O.U.
Been to heck and back, but an angel was looking through
It was you, yeah, you
It's all because of you

You are the reason
You are the reason I wake up every day
And sleep through the night
You are the reason, the reason

In the middle of the night
I'm going down 'cause I adore you
I want to floor you

I'm giving it up
No more running around spinning my wheel
You came out of my dream and made it real
I know what I feel
It's you
It's all because of you

You are the reason
You are the reason I wake up every day
And sleep through the night
You are the reason, the reason

In the middle of the night
I'm going down 'cause I want you
I want to touch you
I want to floor you
You are the reason, baby

You are the reason
You are the reason I wake up every day
And sleep through the night
You are the reason, the reason


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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

Oh I can't come near expressing how my heart aches for you. I've started to write and had to leave and come back, As everyone has said.. please don't feel guilty, you did all you could to keep him safe. This was a terrible accident and it was just that an accident. We don't know the "whys" when it comes to these things.
You know in your heart how very much you loved Max.... you know you did all for him with love.. that is never ever wrong .
I have to also tell you how very very special you are to have shared your pain with us. That was not an easy thing to do.. Please know your SM family is here for you... understanding your pain, and feeling your saddness with you. You little Angel Max will live forever within your heart.. he also lives forever in that special place where he can still be your very special little guardial angel.


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## TheButtercup (Mar 3, 2005)

mersada, i'm so so sorry to hear this







as the others have said, please dont continue to feel guilt over this, you did what you thought was best for your baby, no different than millions of people do each day with their pet. many of us have done the same thing, daily, for years. please hold on to the joy he brought you, as that's what he is doing right now, looking down from heaven, searching for his mommy's smiling face. 
he showed you true happiness and unconditional love. many people never see that in their lives. 








you're in my prayers tonight, i pray for happiness and joy to return to you life quickly, and remember, we're ALL here for you!!!!























ann marie and the buttercup


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## joe (Jan 5, 2003)

for max and his mommy...

http://spoiledmaltese.com/rainbowbridge/ma...505-012306.html


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## Kisses-4-Princess (Dec 4, 2005)

Max's mom, I'm so sorry you had to go through this.This brings tears to my eyes .I can only imagine how you are feeling. My last puppy died in front of me. I had my hands on her to keep her warm and she stopped breathing- I started screaming and crying so hard... I kept thinking she will start breathing again. I was a zombie for the few days that followed but I started thinking in a whole different way. I think, at least I had her for the time I did and had all that fun with her.

I know its hard to loose him but at least you had him for the time that you did =), it was enough time to show that life can be so much better. It was enough time to make you laugh and smile enough to make your condition better. I was just like you, in the hospital for a few days before she came home with me and I felt like she was better medicine than anything Dr can prescribe. Its been almost 2 months now and I am a few weeks away from getting a new puppy. I'm sure, one day, another special furbaby will find his/her way to you and touch your heart again.

lots of hugs!!


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## Carol Ann (Dec 5, 2004)

I ache so deeply for you. I am so very sorry. You were (and will always be) a great mommy to Max, and did everything you could to make the time while you were away better for him. He will always live in your heart, and you in his. I don't often cry, but I am now. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.





















Rest in peace, Max.


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## Gemma (Jan 19, 2006)

Sorry to read this so late. I am so sorry. I am so shocked, my heart just dropped and I'm sitting here with a big headache that just came out of nowhere. I can't even imagine how you are feeling. It was an accident and the chances of having an accident in the house was even higher especially with all the wires. Please take some time and then bring another Maltese home. I am so sad


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## sassy's mommy (Aug 29, 2005)

It has taken me a few hours to gather my thoughts and to be able to respond to this thread. I am truly sorry for the loss of your beautiful little Max. I can not imagine how you must have felt when you walked into your home and found him there. My heart goes out to you. I hope you are able to allow yourself to find another baby soon. These little angels are great companions and as you said they help when human medical knowledge can not. I lost my father 2 yrs. ago. My Sassy was such a little angel through all my grieving, she was always there sitting with the mommy even when I was having a bad day. I know you will need to grieve in you own way. But please, allow yourself to love another little fluff butt. The love they return is worth more than words can ever express. You don't have to go away, you can still hang out and continue to learn and share funny stories. We are all friends here. We sometimes get on one another's last nerve, but through it all we are a family and friends. Please accept our sincere condolences and may the memories of little Max forever fill your heart with joy and laughter. 

~Pat and Sassy


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## Carla (Aug 30, 2005)

I am so very sorry for you. I can't imagine what you are going through. Please don't blame yourself. As others have said, you did what many of us do on a daily basis. This was a tragic accident that you are not to blame for it.

Many have found that getting another pet helped them to overcome their grief. The new pet won't take the place of your other one but they can bring you a great deal of comfort.









Carla & Shotzi


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## Amymalteser (Sep 19, 2004)

I'm so very very sorry.

God bless Max.

Susan and Amy


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## SandiJM (Nov 18, 2005)

I'm so glad you came back to the forum. As the others have said, this accident was not your fault. My heart breaks for you and I'd love to give you a big hug... but as I can't... is there someone that you could stay with that could?? I'm so worried about you being home alone now. Is there a possiblity you could stay with your mom, children, or best friend for a few days? (Hopefully someone with internet access.)


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## Guest (Jan 24, 2006)

I am so very very sorry for your loss. My heart is aching for you.


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## abbey (Apr 4, 2005)

Maxsmommy, I am so sorry for your loss. My prayers will be with you. You were a good Mommy, unfortunately tragic accidents do happen. Please don't blame yourself. We are all here for you & feel your pain.








God bless Max.


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## zsazsasmom (Nov 1, 2004)

I am so so sorry. My heart is so heavy right now and the tears wont stop. May Max watch over you always.


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## maltx3 (Dec 23, 2004)

I would like to add my sincere condolances to you at this sad, sad time. I am so sorry this accident happened, my heart is breaking for you. I hope you can take some comfort in knowing your SM family is here to help you in any way we can


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## Ladysmom (Oct 19, 2004)

I am so sorry for your loss of your Max. I cannot imagine how awful you must feel. I am at a loss for words.


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## lacey (Oct 17, 2005)

I am so sorry. Prayers for you. Hearing this breaks my heart.


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## fach (Jun 27, 2005)

> I got Max in October. Since then I have been home with him and happy I was able to because the first couple of months are the most crucial. He got used to me being here and used to going everywhere with me. Perhaps not the greatest thing, maybe I spoiled him with that too much. Since, he was out with me so much, I always worried about the possibility of him getting away or getting lost, so a couple of weeks ago I put his tag on and now added his rabies tag because we needed it for him to get groomed last week, too.
> 
> Today I started my first day of class to become and alcohol/drug councelor. This morning, I gathered a box of toys for him, his big biscuit to keep him busy, a nice cushy pillow to sleep on and a magazine to tear up, because that is what he liked doing. I put him in the kitchen and put the baby gate up. Ofcourse he was upset when I was leaving. I left at 8:30 in the morning and returned before 4 pm...to find him hanging on the baby gate life less with his nose poking through one of the triangles. His name tag got caught in one of the openings and he choked to death......I feel soooo guilty. I feel so heart broken. He is in my lap right now, and I feel like he is going to wake up any minute and start licking my face like he always does, but this time he won't.
> 
> ...


Oh my goodness! I am soo sorry. I can only imagine what you must feel. Please allow the kind members on this site to help you over this extremely difficult time. This might have been your baby, but we all fall in love with the other members dogs here. We will be here if you need us. God bless.


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## Gizmosmom (Oct 21, 2004)

I read half of what you posted last night and had to log off. I thought I was going to trow up and I cried all night, and now I am back here and I am crying again. I can't believe such a tragic thing could happen and I can't begin to imagine how you feel right now. I won't be back into this thread because it upsets me too much (I'm a very sensitive person as I'm sure you can see) but I had to come back and tell you how sorry I am. If I could reverse time for you I would do it in a heartbeat. I want to thank you too. My mom has the type of gate you described and I have often worried about it but pushed the worry out of my head. I will no longer allow her to use the gate when we leave my furbaby's there. I don't know what else to says. May your heart heal and please take care of yourself. You couldn't have known and if you did you would have taken measures to prevent this from happening. I wish, I wish, I wish I had the power to undo.


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## Theresa (Mar 10, 2005)

I am deeply sorry for your lose, PLEASE don't blame yourself








My tears are with you right now. 
I will keep you in my prayers , Please keep intouch with us I feel we are a family.


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## Maria71 (Sep 25, 2005)

I am so very sorry for your loss..my heart just dropped when I read what happened .Please take care


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## Fenway's Momma (Dec 6, 2005)

I am very much in shock after reading about your tragedy. I am deeply sorry for your pain and loss.









Renee


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

I am so sorry for the terrible loss of your Max. Please take comfort in knowing that he loved you so unconditionally. I can't imagine the pain you are going through as I am sitting here crying with my heart in pieces. Please know that we are here for you and if there is anything I/we can do for you, please ask. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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## sheila2182 (Nov 28, 2004)

There are no words that I can even find to say how sorry I am







What a horrible thing to happen,my heart is just breaking for you.Please remember that it was not your fault,your a great Mommy.Allow your SM family to help you through this time







We are here to listen,talk ,send







and cry with you.God Bless you and ease your pain


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## Janice29 (Jan 9, 2006)

I am so sorry for your loss. I have heard this is a possibility when it comes to collars, but I have never known it to happen. Again, I'm very sorry.


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## pico's parent (Apr 5, 2004)

You are a brave woman to write us all a warning in the midst of such a tragedy. It broke my heart to read your post and to know you felt so guilty when you were really protecting little Max out of unmeasurable love for him.

We all protect these vulnerable furbabies, sometimes to extreme degrees, but accidents will still happen.

Max has some wonderful company at Rainbow Bridge where he waits to join you some day. My Gertie, Missy and many others whose names don't come to mind immediately are all gathered round Max to reassure him that someday you will reunite. 

As we at Spoiled Maltese gather round you to reassure you that you are a good Malt Mom and we all look forward to the day you introduce us to a new furbaby.


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## Baxter and Wally's Mom (Aug 18, 2005)

Mersada, I'm so devastated for you. It took me nearly a day to come back and tell you how much I pray that you don't feel guilt. I hope knowing the love and joy Max brought you will encourage you to adopt a new baby to love and comfort you. One never replaces another, but you'll find you have an abundance love to give and recieve. god be with you in this tragic time. Please PM me if there is any thing I can do for you! Jean


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## Paco Taco (Dec 12, 2005)

Oh my gosh. I am so unbelievably sorry to hear this. It really is heartbreaking. I'm sure there's nothing any of us can say to make you feel better. You poor thing, I hope that you have people around you to give you plenty of hugs right now.

Thank you for telling everyone here about this and making us more aware that something like this can really happen. I'm so very sorry sweetie. Take care of yourself, please.

Many hugs going your way.


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## BaileysMom (Feb 7, 2005)

I'm terribly sorry for your loss.. It was obvious through your posts the love you had for Max..


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## AJ (Jun 5, 2005)

Oh, I am so so sorry, I just can't believe this happened







I'm just speechless, I feel so bad


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## cindy6755 (Mar 20, 2005)

I am so, so sorry. I cried while reading your post.


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## Katsgirls (Oct 25, 2005)

I am so very sorry for your loss.







As I read what you wrote my heart just broke in two. I don't know what to say. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


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## danah (Jan 8, 2005)

I am so sorry I am just now reading your news. My heart goes out to you. There is nothing I can say that can take away your pain. Just know you did what you felt was best and you are in no way to blame!







We are all friends here and please feel free to share your feelings anytime, we are here anytime you need us. Bless you!!!


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## Littlemans Mom (Apr 6, 2005)

My heart goes out to you







I have no words that could possible express how I felt when I read about your baby. My heart melted and all I could do was cry







I am so sorry for your loss and wish that I could just take away your pain. I know that I cannot do that, because to feel the pain now is to have felt the love as well and all the joy that your little one has brought you. Please, as others have said , don't blame yourself. You both will be in my thoughts and prayers .....


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

I am crying as I type this, I am so sorry you had to go through this. I know how you feel, I went through something like that two years ago. I felt so guilty that I wasn't their to take care my Annie. I also held her for along time, praying God would some how bring her back, My heart still greives the loss, but 6 months ago God gave me my Matilda, she will never replace my Annie, but she brings me great joy and lots of love and kisses.Grieve and cry but know that you did what you thought was right, One day you will look back with memories you and Max shared. I will pray for you, I am so sorry. Paula


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## Theresa (Mar 10, 2005)

> I am crying as I type this, I am so sorry you had to go through this. I know how you feel, I went through something like that two years ago. I felt so guilty that I wasn't their to take care my Annie. I also held her for along time, praying God would some how bring her back, My heart still greives the loss, but 6 months ago God gave me my Matilda, she will never replace my Annie, but she brings me great joy and lots of love and kisses.Grieve and cry but know that you did what you thought was right, One day you will look back with memories you and Max shared. I will pray for you, I am so sorry. Paula[/B]


MALITADA , I COULDN'T SAY IT ANY BETTER THAN THIS. I READ MAX 'S POST THIS MORNING AND CRIED MY EYE' S OUT.







I THOUGHT ABOUT YOU ALL DAY LONG MAX'S MOMMY AND I HAVE TO SAY, PLEASE DON'T BLAME YOURSELF GOD HAS A PLAN FOR EVERYTHING . HE NEEDED MAX FOR SOMEITHING VERY IMPORTANT. I TRULY BELIEVE THIS.. PLEASE STAY ON THIS SITE WE WOULD MISS YOU VERY MUCH..I'M THINKING OF YOU
THERESA AND SUMMER

YOU KNOW I HAD A VERY GOOD FRIEND WHO LOST HER DAURGHTER TO CANCER AT AGE 11 THIS LAST MONTH AND I BELIEVE GOD MIGHT HAVE CALLED ONE OF HIS VERY SPECIAL PETS TO HEAVEN TO HELP A VERY SPECAIL LITTLE GIRL TO ADJUST TO HEAVEN GOD BLESS YOU


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## wagirl98665 (Jan 5, 2006)

I just can't begin to express how my heart breaks for you and Max. I am so sorry for your loss. Please don't blame yourself for trying to protect and keep Max safe, you did the best that you could. I know there aren't any words right now that will ease your terrible pain, but try to remember that...God Never Makes A Burden To Heavy To Carry...Time will heal your pain and you will be with Max again someday.









Our Deepest Sympathy,

Brenda & Mikey


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## Brooks (Jun 27, 2005)

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know you feel guilty, but it's not your fault. I'll pray for peace in your heart for Max.


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

I want to thank all of you guys for your caring and kind words. It helps to know that if anyone understands the bonds and the love we have for our little munchins it is all of you.

Today I walked into Barnes and Nobles where my eyes focussed on a little book, and the title of that book was "Max's Valentine"....when I got him ready for his last time, I put a little satin ribbon with a little metal heart on his left paw. It came from a little mini book called "True Love"....so, when I saw that book today, I thought it was his way of guiding me to that store to let me know that he loved me, too and still. Lord knows how much he loved to chew books.

Maybe some of you guys don't believe in that stuff, but I do. My little munchin lost his life trying to be near me, and somehow managed a way to come to school with me today...and we spent lunch time together.

It made me feel a bit better. I hold on to the fact that in a few short months that little thing pulled me out of depression. I am not going to let go of that miracle he did for me. I am sad, but not depressed...and have to be grateful to God for giving him to me even for the short time I had with him.

xo~

thank you all.

Max's mom, Mersada


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

Just wanted to share....coincidence? 
I am going to get a copy to keep by his pic.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/reader/0670036684...001#reader-link


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

I know what you mean about little coincidences like that. I remember at my mother's funeral that there was a gust of wind that blew right by me during her burial and it made me think it was her letting me know she was with me. Little things like that and your seeing that special book can go a long way in helping us cope. I'm glad that little book "spoke" to you today.


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## zsazsasmom (Nov 1, 2004)

No coincidence, it was sent to you by Max. I am a firm believer in all of those kinds of things. I believe that is his way of showing you a sign that he made it to the Rainbow Bridge.


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## chloeandj (Apr 1, 2005)

I am so devastated for you, I cried and cried reading your post. Big hugs to you.


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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

I truly believe we are given what we need when we need it most. I think this is to assure you Max is fine and he loves you. You were meant to know this.... and you will always have that special connection!
It gave me 'goose bumps' and a smile knowing you received this very special "gift".

Terry, Naddie and Angel Missy


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## rubyjeansmom (Jan 6, 2005)

Oh my goodness I am sooo sorry you are going through this right now. Prayers and hugs from us--







. That is a beautiful page Joe made for you and Max. I hope you know you have the support and love from all of us.


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

> I know what you mean about little coincidences like that. I remember at my mother's funeral that there was a gust of wind that blew right by me during her burial and it made me think it was her letting me know she was with me. Little things like that and your seeing that special book can go a long way in helping us cope. I'm glad that little book "spoke" to you today.
> 
> 
> 
> ...











I still see little signs from mom sometimes, too. It's comforting. You guys have been a comfort, as well.

thank you so much.


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## HollyHobbie (Apr 12, 2005)

I don't even know what to say....I know sorry is not even enough. I can't imagine the pain you are in. Please take care of yourself. and if you need anyone just know that we are all here for you.


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## Scoobydoo (May 26, 2005)

> > index.php?act=findpost&pid=145200
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I too strongly believe that our loved ones send signs from the other side. When my brother was in the hospital dying of cancer I had just come home late that afternoon from seeing him, I was so miserable and just went and laid on my bed thinking of him and his suffering. As brother and sister we were very close and always were there for one another through good and bad times. I felt what seemed like a weight on the bed behind me and also what felt like a hand on my shoulder, soon the phone rang and it was my sister inlaw calling to tell me my brother's pain was now over and he had gone to rest. To this day I still believe he came to me that afternoon to assure me that he was ok.

Mersada I am sure Max did the very same for you as my brother did for me


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## Chelsey (Dec 17, 2004)

I'm so , so sorry for your loss


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## Tavish (Feb 5, 2005)

God bless you and keep you through this difficult time. I can't imagine what you are experiencing right now, but I do believe that "Max's Valentine" was meant for you. Your little baby doesn't want you to feel guilty about something you had no control over. I am so happy that you were both able to share your lives together, even if it was only for a little while, and it is wonderful to hear what a positive affect Max had on your life. I will keep you both in my prayers.


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## Terri (Jan 26, 2005)

Puddy and I wish to add our condolonces on the loss of your beloved Max.


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## saltymalty (Sep 14, 2004)

May Max be that light which shines brightly in the evening, always guiding you home. 

May his little soul rest in peace.


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## sweetypiegirl (Nov 17, 2005)

i'm soo sorry about what happened to your furbaby Max









"In your time of sadness Thoughts of heartfelt sympathy are with you"

Thinking of you and praying that God will send your peace in this difficult time.


Sorry for your loss,
-Agnes and Sunshine-








a flower for your max


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

Oh Mersada, I cried again when I read your post about Max sending you to the book store. That little boy loved you so much and he wanted you to know that. Just picture him running through the grass now with all of his new little buddies. What a beautiful sight that would be.


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## steponme (Aug 26, 2004)

Words can not explain how sorry i am to hear about your loss. My family will be praying for you. God bless you.

Stephanie and Macy


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## Baxter and Wally's Mom (Aug 18, 2005)

Mersada, I was so relieved to hear you say you were not depressed. Depression and sadness are two different things and I would never want you to go back to that. You are strong now and it is a great testament of your strength. God bless you for coming here with your story, there is probably no one on this board that will ever have a gate without a protective rail on top again, if they have one I urge them to throw it out. You may well have saved other little lives. Glad you are still with us! Stay here and let us know what goes on in the next chapter! I hope it is a new baby. I know from experience how happy they make us when we are sad! Jean


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## louise (Sep 10, 2005)

I am in tears as I read all of this. My heart goes out to you. My little Sophie Is only a week younger than your little one. I have had her for about the same time as you and I understand what a difference they make in you life in a short amout of time. I love her so much. Thank so much for taking the time to warn all of us. just today I was thinging of putting her tags on her collar. 

I am glad to read you are not feelling depressed. I know how hard it cant be to bring youself out of that. You will be in my prayers.


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## Carol Ann (Dec 5, 2004)

Mersada, you are still in my thoughts daily. I'm so glad you had a reassuring sign from little Max. Also, I can't stop thinking about the earlier post of the little eleven year old girl who died last month, and it's comforting to think that Max may now be helping this child, as only these little wonderbabies can. 

Glad you're not depressed.


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

For those who may read this in the future and not know there is a related thread ..... here is Part II ......

http://spoiledmaltese.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=8928&hl=


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## JAKIEP33 (Apr 20, 2005)

i am so sorry for your loss.....


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## denise&chico (Oct 14, 2004)

ohhhhh my heart is broken for you . I am so very sorry at the loss of your little max . Again i dont know what to say except i am so sorry ~ Denise


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## jellybn1 (Mar 16, 2005)

I am terribly sorry for your loss!!! I read this yesterday and cannot stop thinking of you and your baby....I wish you my deepest condoleces....


















































Jellybn1


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## Tanner's Mom (May 27, 2005)

I have been out of town all week and just now read this, I am so very sorry for your loss, you will be in my prayers.


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## Carole (Nov 1, 2005)

Mersada,
I apologize for being so late seeing this thread. How kind of you to take time in your moment of heartbreak to warn others so that they might be spared the kind of grief







you are enduring.








Sending my deepest sympathy for your tragic loss.









~Carole, Bella, and Krista~


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## AmyGil (Jan 6, 2006)

That is so very sad, I understand what you mean about your dog lifting you more than any meds can becuase I have simular problems, I hope you will be able to get better. The same thing happend to a friend of mines Maltese cross, except she jumped off the deck and got cought on something. It is very shocking, I am very sorry for your loss.


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## Koa (Oct 11, 2005)

Ohhhh... I am so sorry for your loss. :-( It made me cry to read. I am so sorry. Don't blame yourself. There are a million things that could go wrong and there is no way to prepare for them all. I always thought you were so helpful to me raising Koa. I hope you start to feel better soon. And after a while, maybe you can get a new maltese to bring extra love into your life. Take care.


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## samsonsmom (May 4, 2005)

I just now read this post, and like the others, I have no words to express my deep sorrow for your loss. Please don't blame yourself for this tragic accident. Max does not blame you. From personal experience I would advise you to search out a new companion as soon as you feel you can handle it. Don't deprive yourself of the joy of being owned by a maltese because of this. A new little friend will never replace Max. But there is room in your heart for a wee little fur ball. I know my late Woofie sent Sammie to me and visits with me from time to time through Sammie-boy. It won't mean you love Max any less, but you already know the comfort you can get from their sweetness and the pure joy of just having them around. 

Positive thoughts and prayers are with you. 

Samsonsmom


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## corisu (Jan 18, 2006)

Hi,

I am new to here and just read this. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I can totally relate. I used to have another maltese. His name was Bobby. He was about 2 years old when this happened. He was out for a potty break on Saturday night-my street is normally a ghost town around this hour. Anyways, he went across the street (he knows he's not supposed to). He was gone for a few minutes so I went outside to look for him. I called his name the first time but he didn't come. So I walked out the the sidewalk and asked him to come over again. Just as he was about to do this, out of nowhere a bunch of teenagers came down the street at 30-40 m/h and ran into him. My heart just stopped and I screamed his name. They took off and without getting out of the car to apologise. I saw his tail waging as he lay there lifeless. I cried for days as I blamed myself for being so careless. 

A few days later I decided to get another dog and that's when I met Haylie. She is a yorkie. Our house was so empty without a pet. I just can't bare the pain of owning a maltese again at that time since it was too painful to see something I loved so dear leave me. I was afraid I would see it all happen again. It was only recently I build the courage again to get a maltese. I met Yoshi in June and have been very cautious and careful with him. I told myself that this will never happen to Yoshi or Haylie.

Mary


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

Thank you for more of your warm thoughts.

I am actually doing ok with it. I chose to hold on to the good Max brought into my life and spend less time thinking of the tragedy. I do thank God for letting me have him for the time that I did....and for my gratitude I think God blessed me with Angie....she is the sweetest most gentle dog I have known.

I am teaching her how to kiss...she doesn't really lick but she does peck my lips with hers...it's the cutest thing.

Thank you for your sympathy....but, I have deffinitely moved on putting a positive memory attached to Max...and hope to keep it that way.

there are no guarantees in life...but we can choose to hang on to the grief or choose the joyful memories...I chose the later...and will always be Max's mom.


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## hillary&lola (Apr 4, 2006)

i am crying as i read what happend to your baby and you. you will be in our thoughts, thank you for sharing what happend so that you can help others. please find someone to talk to and help you thru this very difficult time.


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

It's April, this tragedy happened in February....we are doing alot better, have been blessed with two Angels since then.......

In Max's memory, my new pup was named Angel (Angie for short) and I just adopted a 5 year old Malt named Angel (male)....and I will never forget how two Angels came to be......


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