# How to deal with a broken heart



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

This past weekend was so hard for us. Weekends are our time to relax at home with the fluffs, to get some chores done, or do visit with family and friends. But mostly, it was time to relax with the fluffs. Being at home is SO sad and difficult for us right now. It hurts every time we take Ozzie out, feed him, when the doorbell rings, he doesn’t rush to bark at them. Ozzie is not himself. He was so accustomed to protecting/dominating Lisa that he just doesn’t know what to do with himself anymore, he just follows me around. He isn’t eating like normal, but eventually he gets hungry enough.

Being at work makes it hard to concentrate on anything else, but at least there aren’t constant reminders. Literally all weekend, I stayed in bed (save for the very few times I would drag myself to the couch) with Ozzie reading pet bereavement books with the occasional watching of trash TV. I couldn’t even be bothered to shower or change out of my pajamas. 

I haven’t been this severely depressed in 5 or 6 years. I went through a difficult period when my grandfather died suddenly, bad break up and getting laid off all within a matter of months. I pulled myself out of that one, only to face my now-husband’s year-long deployment to Egypt a few years later. I finally went on anti-depressants for that, and I’m not even sure if they helped, but I went off them when he came because they made me dizzy. I hope I won’t need to go back on now, but this is worse than any pain I have ever felt in my entire life. I really don’t know how I will ever get over this.

We have discussed the prospect of another dog down the road. I know we will not be ready for several months, years, maybe. I know I will always have a dog, I just have to. But I don’t know if I will ever have 2 dogs at once for a very long time. I turned 29 just a week before Lisa’s passing, so we are talking about having kids in a year or so. Taking care of two dogs can be so stressful… let me tell you, it is SO strange to go from watching over two dogs to one, and vice versa. I don’t know if I have the heart or strength to take on another when I want to have a baby in the next couple years. 

But you all know me, I would never take in any animal but a rescue. Especially to take Lisa’s place, as she was such a special rescue. So part of me would feel guilty and selfish for NOT taking in another. And I can’t foster, my husband couldn’t take it (getting close and then letting them go), plus we both work full time and Ozzie hates other dogs at first, but he also seemed so dependent on Lisa…

I can say this, some of the pet bereavement books helped. By far the most comforting one was Animals In Spirit by Penelope Smith. I am not a religious person, but after this tragedy, I HAVE to believe I will see her again. It is literally the ONLY thing keeping me from bursting out into despair. After reading this book, I NEED to speak to an animal communicator for closure. I HAVE to know that Lisa is okay, and at peace, and that she knows she is dead. And I have to ask if it was quick for her. It has been haunting me. I would have given ANYTHING to lose her to some medical condition. I would have hated to see her suffer in any way, but this is pure ****. At least I would have been able to say goodbye. I envy anyone who got to give their pet a clean, peaceful death.


----------



## BeautifulMaltese (Dec 4, 2013)

Oh Courtney, my heart truly breaks for you. I read your other post and cried right along with you. It is so hard to lose them, but it will get easier. I know the circumstances for which you lost her were especially hard, but it just takes time. Ozzie will be okay, I am sure this is very sad for him too, but he needs you and loves you. Hang in there....Hugs....


----------



## Sylie (Apr 4, 2011)

Sometimes, when my grief became to hard to bear, I would just lay on the floor and thrash and scream like a two year old having a tantrum. The pain will gradually diminish, in 10 years you may be able to tell Lisa's story without hurting. Until then, I say let it out. 
There is plenty of time to make plans for the future, for now it is open to what comes next. Don't make an effort to move on, but be open to your next step.

You know Lisa better than some person who makes a living as an "animal communicator". Remember that place where she could read your mind, and you could read hers? It is in your MIND (not brain or thoughts) and you can find it, and you can find Lisa, it will be more like a feeling than a thought.


----------



## pippersmom (May 21, 2012)

I am so sorry you had to go through this terrible loss and my heart is breaking for you.


----------



## mdbflorida (Feb 28, 2013)

I can't even begin to tell you how much I have thought of you and what you are going through. I do think it is harder for you because you weren't able to hold her and say good bye. I have had my share of pain and I think what you will need to try to do is to try to get some exercise. Take Ozzie for some long walks. I know it is not easy but try not to hide . Hugs from Florida.


----------



## Lou's Mom (Apr 8, 2014)

Oh sweetie, my heart breaks for you. It's so hard to lose them especially the way you did. I pray that you will find peace, love on Ozzie, he will help you through this. And listen for Lisa - she is with you and she knows you loved her. When my rottie died in my arms my heart broke. She had a very distinct way that she scratched her ears, there was a rhythm to it. Weeks later after I had cried until there were no more tears and I was still in a funk, I heard that scratch and the tags jingle, I thought I was losing my mind. I didn't tell anyone - a few days later my husband came in the kitchen totally white, he told me he had heard Sophie scratching. I smiled and said she's letting us know she's ok. I hope that Lisa will give you a sign, to let you know she's happy and to say thank you.


----------



## jbh06751 (May 16, 2014)

Courtney, it's so fresh. Allow yourself to fall apart a little. This one was rough. Keep Ozzie in your lap and love him up. He has no idea what is going on. Little by little a new normal will develop.
When the time is right to adopt again you will feel it and whatever little dog ends up in your care will be lucky indeed.
We adopted very soon after a loss but that's just us. He helped us heal. The hurt is still there of course but it's getting better. 
Go ahead and grieve for as long as you need to and know it WILL get better.


----------



## wkomorow (Aug 26, 2011)

Courtney,

Death is never easy, but this has been an especially difficult. It is important to continue to talk about it, to take time out to cry, to think about the loss. But is is equally important to think about the great times you have with Lisa, the wonderful set of circumstances that led to to her. And remember Lisa would want you to go to the next level where the happy memories are greater than the pain of loss.


----------



## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

Dear Courtney, I really understand where you are coming from. Boycie is my first pet, the pup I wanted my whole life and everything I ever wanted. Prior to getting him, I was in a very bad place. I also lost my grandfather suddenly from a heart attack, he was my rock, my joy. I was devastated. Not to mention other life circumstances, it seems that when everything starts going downhill, it just won´t stop 

I have been battling major depression and psychosis for over 10 years, I am 26 now and still on meds, my doctor thinks I will need them throughout my life. What keeps me going is my mother and my Boycie. I have held onto him and reflected back on all the happy moments I had with my beloved grandfather. Until I got Boycie, I thought there was no more hope for me, I lost a lot of weight, barely left the apartment for months, neglected everything. He helped me start to love life again and to enjoy life. I even started enjoying going out and being around people because he was there with me! What I want to tell you is that Ozzie is your rock! You will see it now as time goes by. Believe me, I know what it means to lose something you love so dearly, that you think you cannot live without! IT DOES GET BETTER. You will get to a point where you will LOVE to talk about her and everything you shared together, without crying. It does not matter how she passed anymore, it is over. You have to try to be happy again, for your family, for Ozzie. He needs you as much as you need him. Use this time you have to spend more quality time with him, enjoy the moments you have together. Focus on making him happy, that will make you happy. We have to concentrate on happy thoughts in order to be happy, it sounds cheesy, but it is really so. Best of luck to you :heart:


----------



## sherry (Jan 4, 2013)

Lisa, my heart has been broken more than once. It is never easy and it hurts, a lot. Take your time, feel the pain and release it as your soul allows it. Take care of Ozzie, think about the family you want. Little Lisa wants her Mommy and Daddy to be happy and live a wonderful life. She will always be there in your heart.


----------



## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

Courtney I'm very proud of you, you are reaching out to us, instead of stuffing it down inside yourself, so many of us have been through death, it's not easy, we all have different stories, but we all know that deep sadness and pain. I never knew I could cry like I have, losing a loved one or a loved pet it's the same pain, we miss them, it's not fair how little Lisa died, it's a terrible nightmare, one day you will look back and only remember the wonderful times you have had with her. Promise
Ozzie is grieving, it will take time, my Miss Bow grieved for her previous owner for almost a year, Matilda has lost Muffy and Miss Bow, her way of grieving is having to be with us, if we aren't in sight she freaks out. Hopefully she will adjust soon.
I wish I could give you a big hug :wub:


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

I know it's not the same as a close family member but it was the circumstances surrounding her death... & less Than 2 years together.... We were robbed. Lisa deserved far better... A long & happy life with us  she had been thru SO much already... She was dumped & abandoned at Chicago animal control where she was matted & terrified. They thought she was a male bichon. She had her eye removed. She was a good dog, she trusted us... She didn't deserve this  she didn't deserve to die on the side of the road, alone and scared. 


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Sorry I'm just saying what keeps going thru my head... I'm so angry with the world right now, not any of you! <3


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

:hugging:I understand:wub:


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

And I wish I could talk to Lisa.. But I don't have the psychic gene... I just hope she is happy & at peace and that if heaven is real that dogs are there too..


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

Courtney, if you can find a copy, there's a book I like by Charles Tazewell called The Littlest Uninvited One. Brings tears to my eyes every time I read it.


----------



## MalteseObsessed (Mar 7, 2010)

Courtney, hugs to you during this very difficult time. Grieving is very hard and we all grieve very differently. I am so sad for you and yours during this very difficult time. We are all with you as you carry this loss in your heart, and so is your sweet loving Lisa! ...so sorry...hugs!
Hedy


----------



## Ann Mother (Dec 18, 2013)

Wish I could remove this inconsolable pain of grief. Keep on venting do not hold it in & we are here for you.


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## SammieMom (Nov 13, 2010)

Courtney-
I am glad your giving yourself time before making any big decisions. It helps me put things in perspective to talk with a clergy in times of great loss. The anger and pain can suck you in fast if your prone to depression. Keep sharing. It helps. Poor Ozzie. He is going through a lot too. 
Take care.


----------



## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

CorkieYorkie said:


> This past weekend was so hard for us. Weekends are our time to relax at home with the fluffs, to get some chores done, or do visit with family and friends. But mostly, it was time to relax with the fluffs. Being at home is SO sad and difficult for us right now. It hurts every time we take Ozzie out, feed him, when the doorbell rings, he doesn’t rush to bark at them. Ozzie is not himself. He was so accustomed to protecting/dominating Lisa that he just doesn’t know what to do with himself anymore, he just follows me around. He isn’t eating like normal, but eventually he gets hungry enough.
> 
> Being at work makes it hard to concentrate on anything else, but at least there aren’t constant reminders. Literally all weekend, I stayed in bed (save for the very few times I would drag myself to the couch) with Ozzie reading pet bereavement books with the occasional watching of trash TV. I couldn’t even be bothered to shower or change out of my pajamas.
> 
> ...


Oh Courtney, it makes me very sad to see you suffering so much but I can understand of course and unfortunately there are no words to take away for your pain and grief.
Every day and night, every single minute or situation is new and so different for you and your family now and makes it more difficult. 
You are writing down your feelings to us and this is a first step. We all are here trying to help you with listening, so sorry there is not more we can do for you. 
May be there is a chance to find and talk to an animal communicator as you suggested in your post. Often these people are familiar to situations and losses and can help professionally.
Courtney, I have never been through such a tragedy you are just going through but I have lost two beloved dogs in my life yet. One in the young age of only 1,5 years through not curable health issues and the other one through her age. Both situations were the hardest in my life I can tell they changed it and my person very much. 
My family and one good friend helped me through both hard times. 
I really hope and wish you will find a way to deal with it and handle your deep sadness. 
Please know we are always here for you to listen! May all this answers comfort you a little bit.
Sending lots of hugs and prayers to you, your husband and of course little Ozzie. For him it's probably very hard and confusing. 

Alexandra


----------



## cyndrae (Aug 30, 2009)

Courtney I am so sorry you are going through this and it will take time but please don't let depression win. There are so many choices for meds if the ones you have taken don't work for you there are others. Make sure your dr. helps you find the right ones. I have been on depression meds for a very long time and I know I will be for a very long time. Talk to your Dr. I am on two different types one alone did not cut it.

So many people do not understand how depression can be do debilitating. It is not something that we can see like a broken arm but it is there and can stop us from living life. 

Again I am so sorry for your loss and pain and time will help but please get help if you need it even if for only this painful time.


----------



## pammy4501 (Aug 8, 2007)

Courtney, I too lost a dog way too early in her life. She had GME. For me what helped was having meaning come from the loss. I decided to work to raise funds for GME research. Perhaps you could start something similar in Lisa's name. I know of a wonderful site where you can start a fund raising page to collect donations for what ever health realated cause you are fond of. Or perhaps for a rescue. All in Lisa's name. It helped me to bridge the seeming pointlessness of the loss.


----------



## Polly's mom (Apr 29, 2013)

CorkieYorkie said:


> And I wish I could talk to Lisa.. But I don't have the psychic gene... I just hope she is happy & at peace and that if heaven is real that dogs are there too..
> 
> 
> Sent from Petguide.com Free App


Courtney, have you thought of Sonya Fitzpatrick? I would also be desperate to communicate with my precious baby and I know a few Moms on the forum have used her.


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Yes, I have, but she charges $300 for half an hour... that's about how much Lisa's adoption fee was..! I also found one one in IL who charges $95 for an hour, but not sure if she is as "good" as Sonya. I am also thinking about trying to call into her Sirius show too, but probably won't get through..

I will definitely start a memorial... just not sure which organization to use, she came from Dog Patch which is for profit, and before that Chicago ACC which is funded by the government and is a pretty horrendous place...

Thank you all for the kindness. I know no one knows what to do/say for me. It is nice that you all listen. I just felt I was robbed and that this shouldn't have happened. 

I still have a lot of anger, especially at my former dog walker and her husband, who are ultimately responsible for Lisa's untimely and horrible death.


----------



## Kathleen (Aug 4, 2011)

Sonya Fitzpatrick has a book - I think it is "No Sad Dogs in Heaven" - about dealing with loss. It gets very good reviews.
I think it is definitely worth a try calling her show. You never know, you might get through.


----------



## pippersmom (May 21, 2012)

CorkieYorkie said:


> I know it's not the same as a close family member but it was the circumstances surrounding her death... & less Than 2 years together.... We were robbed. Lisa deserved far better... A long & happy life with us  she had been thru SO much already... She was dumped & abandoned at Chicago animal control where she was matted & terrified. They thought she was a male bichon. She had her eye removed. She was a good dog, she trusted us... She didn't deserve this  she didn't deserve to die on the side of the road, alone and scared.
> 
> 
> Sent from Petguide.com Free App


 
Don't let anyone tell you that it's not the same as a close family member because it is. Lisa was part of your family and you loved her so much. I know I would feel exactly the same as you are feeling right now and I would be so angry at everyone, I would even be angry at other people who still had their dogs and I would think that its just not fair, why did this have to happen. I know I would feel like that because that's how I felt after my Dad died. I would look at other elderly men and think "how come they are still here and healthy and my Dad's gone". Just keep coming here to let it all out because we all understand.


----------



## Chardy (Oct 30, 2008)

Courtney, My heart aches for you... I did speak with an animal communicator after my Chardy's passing. I will share with you what she had me do. Lay very still in bed on your back with nothing to disturb you (no tv on etc) and think of Lisa looking at you with your eyes closed. Slowly take both of your hands and criss cross them over your heart and hold them there.

Let me know what you feel.. it is amazing.

I hope this will help.


----------



## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

Courtney, try not to think of it as you are replacing Lisa... You're not...It's not wrong to want to have the pitter patter of little fluff feet...
You did all you could to keep her safe and I know it hurts...
Give it time, you can always look into rescue when you;'re ready...Taking care of two dogs plus a child can be hard. 
If you plan on kids, then maybe think about kids first, then you can add a doggie later, when it's time...
hugs,my dear!


----------



## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

CorkieYorkie said:


> I know it's not the same as a close family member but it was the circumstances surrounding her death... & less Than 2 years together.... We were robbed. Lisa deserved far better... A long & happy life with us  she had been thru SO much already... She was dumped & abandoned at Chicago animal control where she was matted & terrified. They thought she was a male bichon. She had her eye removed. She was a good dog, she trusted us... She didn't deserve this  she didn't deserve to die on the side of the road, alone and scared.
> 
> 
> Sent from Petguide.com Free App


Courtney - I just saw this on FB -- someone posted an article in the Washington Post: The death of pet can hurt as much as the loss of a relative - The Washington Post
I wish there was some way for us to ease your pain. I know that it's hard for you to see, but Lisa's life was the time she spent with you. She didn't know if it was short or long...she just spent every day loving the three of you and being happy after whatever bad things preceded you adopting her. That was her life. I always think that when people die suddenly we're so devastated for them...but it wasn't hard on them, it's hard on us living without them. I lost my dad that way when I was 6. He walked out the door whistling and dropped dead in an office meeting that afternoon of a severe heart attack. He went very quickly and didn't know what was happening. Nothing to prepare us at all. Problem was back in those days people didn't talk about it (especially to kids)and that's the worst thing that could happen. You bottle up a lot of pain for years. I'm so glad you're opening up and talking to us. I think it will help. :grouphug:


----------



## Ahag (Aug 28, 2013)

I hate when we have to go through this pain. I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. I wish for you to start feeling better soon. Lots of prayers and love sending your way.


----------



## sdubose (Feb 21, 2012)

Courtney, I am so sorry you are going through this. I am praying for your pain to ease. You was a good mama to Lisa. She did not have a good start, but then she had you. You and your husband showed her how it felt to have a loving and good life. She was blessed to be a part of your family. I do believe in heaven and I'm not saying that to push my beliefs on you. It's just how I deal with the loss. I believe anything with a soul goes there and is made whole. I believe our pets have souls. I picture their spirit in this wonderful and beautiful place with no pain and no suffering. This brings me a little comfort. I will being thinking of you in this time.


----------



## edelweiss (Apr 23, 2010)

Courtney, I can't get you off my heart---so many here feel this way. I know you are in deep pain & grief. I also know a broken heart is much like a broken bone---it takes time to heal & no matter what, it can't be hurried. 
I don't speak of this often because it is so personal, but I am on a first name basis with relentless grief. The "if onlys" will consume you, the guilt, the blame, the anger, the hurt, the revenge you wish on others, the jealousy you feel when you compare situations & other's joy. This and so much more can lead you to a deep, deep hole that becomes harder & harder to dig one's self out of.
I don't want to share too much on an open forum, but I truly understand where you are coming from---mine had to do w/the murders of 2 persons close to me & not w/a pup and there was a finality about it that could not be reasoned out. The only thing that got me through it was my faith---the same faith by which I have been sustained in other times of grief.
Please try to think about Lisa this way---she did not understand time---she lived in the moment & you & Sean gave her all the sweetest ones she ever had. She did not think "oh my life was short & I have suffered so much." She lapped up the attention she got from you both. She was a human magnet---she understood that she was loved. I would say she was a "lucky dog" to have landed w. you & be able to spend her last days on earth being cherished.
Any animal communicator is going to tell you what you want to hear and although I don't believe in them myself, I would say if that is what will bring finality for you then go there; take out of it what you need. 
I believe God loves his creation, both animal & human (he spared more animals than people when he destroyed the earth in the first big flood). I also know that animals will be in heaven because He says "the lion will lie down w/the lamb" in eternity. 
Grief exacts a high cost on those who must bear it, but we can redeem it by what we do w/it---that may be a long way down the road, but keep putting one foot in front of the other one & you will arrive.
I wish I could take away your pain. It is good to keep opening up & talking about it---don't feel bad about your feelings---they are part of your deep, sensitive person. Big hugs to you both!


----------



## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Courtney -- my heart breaks for you. I know how hard it is to lose someone we love, and, of course to lose a pet. I once lost a 4 month old Lhasa puppy. She drowned in the swimming pool when I ran in the house for "just a minute". The guilt and loss were overwhelming. It's been more than 25 years since this happened, and I still live with the guilt and loss.

Since I suffer from severe depression, I do know that medication can help. But it sometimes takes a while to get the exact right medication. I've gone through so many. Some have helped for a while -- some not at all. Some have side effect and others haven't had side effects for me. I would encourage you to try another medication and see if it helps.

If you are able to go to a Pet Physic/Communicator, please consider Sonya Fitzpatrick. She is truly the best, imho. As you probably know, I have annual readings with her and have communicated with my fluffs that have passed many times. Her readings with my fluffs that have passed have provided me comfort and insight.

Sending lots of hugs to you and prayers for Sean. From my experience, it takes time to get over the loss and there's really nothing one can do to speed it up.


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Thank you all for the kind words & prayers, & especially those of you who shared their own experiences with loss &/or depression.. I am determined not to let it overpower me again, I finally have a career I love and a man I love who loves me, & little Ozzie of course, so I refuse to sacrifice any of that... When it was just me, now that's a different story. It was much easier to succumb when I was single, dogless and either in a dead end job or unemployed.

Some days are worse than others, mostly when I have time to stop & think & dwell are the worst... Excercise is great advice , just have to get back into it.

Poor Ozzie is a completely different dog without his little Lisa to protect (or dominate lol). He Doesn't know what to do with himself, just follows me around like he did before we got Lisa & eats sporadically as Lisa is not there to steal his food... 


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## beckinwolf (Sep 2, 2008)

You could try Denise Zak. She charges $75 for half an hour. She is a guest on a local morning radio show every Thursday. People call in and ask about their pets. I think she's pretty good. Here's her website...

Tails of the Heart


----------



## Bailey&Me (Mar 8, 2010)

Courtney, my heart hurts so much for you and I am so sorry what you have gone through. It is unimaginable and I know the loss and pain must be so difficult. Please know that we have you in our thoughts and prayers.


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

beckinwolf said:


> You could try Denise Zak. She charges $75 for half an hour. She is a guest on a local morning radio show every Thursday. People call in and ask about their pets. I think she's pretty good. Here's her website...
> 
> Tails of the Heart



Thanks, she is half the price & doesn't live far from me. I just got Sonya's book at work, so I'll see if that persuades me to drop the dough... Was even mildly considering asking the dog walker to pay for it... Still haven't received anything from her regarding Lisa's cremation...

Or I might try calling into Sonya's or Denise's radio show... Maybe they'll feel badly enough for me to out me through...

Just got off the phone with our groomer... Broke down, of course, when she asked "what about Lisa?" I spoke with the owner who groomed my mothers Yorkie for years & used to work at dog patch.. 

She told me months ago that Greg, the owner of dog patch, used Lisa as an example in one of his dog seminars about rescues and how the fact that she was missing an eye made her a desirable dog to adopt... I definitely felt for that poor little girl and her one eye


----------



## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

CorkieYorkie said:


> Thanks, she is half the price & doesn't live far from me. I just got Sonya's book at work, so I'll see if that persuades me to drop the dough... Was even mildly considering asking the dog walker to pay for it... Still haven't received anything from her regarding Lisa's cremation...
> 
> Or I might try calling into Sonya's or Denise's radio show... Maybe they'll feel badly enough for me to out me through...
> 
> ...




I went on Denise's site and read about her. Sounds very interesting and she really is in your area, Courtney. 
It's very disappointing to hear the dog walker hasn't sent anything regarding Lisa's cremation. That's very indecent and disrespectful of her after all what happened. Your lives are shatterd and you and your husband have to deal with it now and of course poor Ozzie.

Hope she will has the decency and catch up with her promise to care for it. Makes me speechless, sad and angry she didn't do yet.

Sending hugs to you and your family! 




Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Yeah who knows what her reasoning is for not sending us the money... We will see if we ever hear back from her.

Just finished Sonya's book, it was very comforting & I'd recommend it to anyone going through grief from losing a pet, but it is all about reincarnation, so not everyone will buy into that... I found it to be extremely comforting but I'm still on the fence with what I believe...

While I realize a psychic is going to tell me what I want to hear, maybe she will have more information, like if Lisa went quickly, if she suffered, if she was sacred (I'm sure she was..) I guess I just want to hear for myself... I need purpose out of this needless tragedy. And I'll admit I am curious what Lisa will say & if she will come back to us as another dog.


----------



## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

Thinking about you and your family today...I hope you hear something from the dog walker/sitter...I'm so sorry this happened..

Please don't take this the wrong way..I'm not a lawsuit happy person.. I don't want to upset you... I'm saying this with love.

I'd sue for mental anguish,it sounds mean or vindictive,it's not even about money..it's not intended that way...

She was careless and Lisa paid the ultimate price..She caused the loss of a precious family member.
Maybe it will help, it will be on the record and hopefully someone researching for a pet sitter will find it and think hard before using her services...

Maybe she will be more careful herself about others beloved babies.. If she decides to pet sit again...

It's about letting that information be known to protect others beloved pets, so they can make an informed choice. It's not about stopping her from petsitting. but letting the consumer beware...

I know if I had to use a pet sitter,I'd sure want access to that information..

You can do what you feel you need to do.
If you get anything out of it,but it might help you feel a little closure and you can use it for a Lisa memorial or donate it to Dog Patch to help other fluffs find homes..


----------



## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

Michelle's words are so true. Fills my heart with more sadness and concern to know that the dogwalker is still in this business and other dog owner's don't know about what happened to Lisa because her inattention. 

I know it's not the money that counts it's more the gesture of her...! 

In this situation it's hard to know in what to believe, I can comprehend very well. Felt empty and desperate after the sudden death of my first dog and had many open questions in my mind. 

As everybody has it's own way of faith I can absolutely imagine the uncertainty you feel what Lisa went through.

Therefore I would try to contact a neutral person to talk about your open questions to find more comfort and peace after it. 

Wishing you will find a way that comforts you in this difficult time. 

Lots of love
Alexandra


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

It makes me sad she hasn't done anything at all. It's inexcusable, it wasn't a little incident it was full out negligence that ended in death. It really break my heart..


----------



## Alexa (Aug 6, 2009)

michellerobison said:


> It makes me sad she hasn't done anything at all. It's inexcusable, it wasn't a little incident it was full out negligence that ended in death. It really break my heart..



You have brought it to the point, Michelle!

That's inexusable but shows up her attitude. 

Heartbreaking, just heartbreaking. 


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

I was recommended her by Maggie (Sweetness & Tessa's mom) here on SM, and I am not sure, but I think that she is still their dog walker/pet sitter.

She is not on Yelp, but I found some weird website where she is listed, and I left a review explaining what happened. 

I am pretty sure the only business she lost/will lose from this whole experience is mine. 

I am also pretty sure that she will never keep her "clients" at her house ever again after this... we were the VERY FIRST ones, and I will never stop being angry that she had to learn this lesson through Lisa's life. Lisa was the one who paid the price for her to "learn;" and our grief and heartbreak, of course. 

As I keep thinking to myself... Lisa certainly didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve to such a violent and horrible death, scared and alone and in the gutter on the side of the road. For all I knew, she laid there suffering, bleeding to death. These are the awful thoughts that keep me up at night. But even more so, how preventable this was... if I had listened to my instinct, instead of trying to be "nice," and if Diane had DONE HER JOB......... 

okay, I need to go focus on something else. Thinking about other things is the only thing keeping my sanity right now.


----------



## Kathleen (Aug 4, 2011)

Courtney, please know that you and your husband are still in my thoughts. I hope that you are doing okay.
A few years ago, my husband and I lost our very first dog, Grendel. The end was very tough. After he died, I found it very difficult to stop thinking about the pain that he went through at the end. One thing that helped me was to make a memory book - sort of a scrap book. I wrote down all the silly nicknames that I had for him, what his favorite toys were, all his little quirks. All the little day to day things that made him unique, and that I missed so much when he was gone. It helped me to focus on the good memories, and think about what a good life he had - good food, lots of snuggling, kind words, how much he loved his little hedgehog toy. Their lives are made up of these little day to day moments, that don't seem important at the time, but they are everything. 
Our minds can go to very dark places, and sometimes I think we just have to fight to push the awful thoughts away and replace them with good thoughts. I know it is not that easy. For me, it was the only way that I could survive - to push the bad thoughts away, and focus on all the happy times. I know it sounds silly - just a little suggestion in case it might help lessen your pain a little.
I know that Lisa had a wonderful life with you and your husband, filled with special moments. Not too many dogs are so loved that they get to be a wedding cake topper. :wub: I hope that you can fill your heart and mind with the happy times - they are in there, you just have to reach for them.


----------

