# When does it all just become too much for you?



## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

:::Rant Warning::: I hate to be a debbie downer, but does being involved with dog rescue, or simply just reading rescue/byb/puppy mill posts on here or on Facebook sometimes become too much to bear? As in, you find yourself becoming increasingly depressed or just have to turn away? At least temporarily?

I have been finding this true with me a lot lately. Sometimes it is anger (I don't have the best temper) but mostly it is just severe sadness and hopelessness at the lack of humanity you see in almost all of these cases... whether it be cruelty, "euthanasia," or abandonment. Some days I just can't take it... I am just wondering how you all cope or if you simply look away when it becomes too much. 

Sometimes I become so angry (ex: recent post on here where new poster is in complete denial about her new puppy's origins) I have to simply log off here or FB before I say something I regret. I have de-friended a college acquaintance who :rolled eyes: at my picture of a gas chamber... because I am on my "high horse" and rescued and slamming people who purchased from "reputable" breeders... keep in mind his dog is a designer breed.

Anyways, what brought this all up today, at least, was a heartbreaking post on FB from a SM member here of a 9 year old Maltese mix that had been in a CA shelter since 11/30 who was euthanized today. I know it happens every day, but I guess the fact that he looked just like Ozzie as well as little Buster having an ID tag on just broke my heart... when I see these stories, especially cruelty/abuse, I just HURT inside... I guess I should say I have been on antidepressants and have been off them for about 5 months or so and while I deeply believe in this cause, I am wondering if I can handle it.. all of it. 

It just seems like an uphill battle that will never be won. None of my FB friends (except fellow rescuers) are supportive nor seem to care. They sometimes bother to comment that my posts are "depressing" or they can't bear to watch the gassing YouTube links. Obviously they'd rather not deal with it. It seems as if not buying from pet stores is enough but that is just one part of this massive problem that most Americans don't even seem to care about!!

I'm not saying I want to give up, I am just asking how you real rescuers deal... advice, actually, would be great. I would love to foster someday when I own my own home (and have my pups behaving better!) and pull from shelters, etc. but I just sometimes wonder if I am cut out for it because some days I just want to sit and cry at the pain these animals endure... but never will I do what most Americans, including many self-proclaimed "animal lovers" do, and that is stick my head in the sand.

With that, I'd like to say RIP Buster... may you run free at the bridge...


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## Sylie (Apr 4, 2011)

it is a never ending battle. It is reasonable to feel hopeless. However, we who support dogs have, in fact made great progress. You need to keep the progress in mind...and in perspective. Now, me, I do not watch television news. I found that watching left me in a state of depression I couldn't handle. Some news you just can't tune out. But honestly, if there is no way we can help to prevent...I would rather not know. Perhaps, I am burying my head in the sand, but I do that to preserve myself. Self preservation.


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## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

It can be overwhelming - however - every time I do a transport, I hold the scared little fluff in my arms and tell it that it is now safe and it doesn't ever have to be scared or afraid again. Telling them that really seems to help me deal with whatever circumstances the fluff came from. 

Several years ago, I transported Samson who was very sick with a liver shunt. He pulled through the surgery and was adopted by his foster mom. I see him every year at NMR's picnic and at the Chicagoland Family Pet Expo. The puppy kisses I get from him make it all worth it!


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## kaeco510 (Sep 28, 2012)

Maggie, how do you deal with seeing all these poor babies in such terrible conditions? I have always wanted to get involved with rescuing but I feel like I couldn't handle it. I would probably want to take them all home :-( and go after the horrible people who treated the dogs so terribly. 


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## LoveLucy (Mar 18, 2012)

It is overwhelming, and I don't currently work in rescue, but I follow rescue groups and the cause. I saw the photo of Buster, and started crying immediately. And then, instead of going on to something else, I keep going back and looking at him. He is beautiful. How could nobody have wanted him? Now, I also have to say, that I have always been pretty sensitive, and I cry easily, but the plight of all these poor dogs just makes me so sad and upset. When I'm done working and babysitting so much, I want to become more involved in rescue, and I, too, wonder if I can handle it. I'm going to start now by volunteering just one day a week at our local shelter. I wonder if it will make me feel better to spend time with these dogs, or if it will just destroy me emotionally. But I have to give it a try. I think the root of MY problem (and maybe yours too), is that I just can't understand how this problem is so out of control in a country that claims to care about the helpless and the vulnerable. It's just hideous. I've just never been the type of person who can just ignore things, even though I know that the solution is largely out of my control. I feel that I have to at least try to do my part to change things.
Anyway, just wanted to say that I know EXACTLY how you feel. (And I've been off my anti-depressants for about the same amount of time as you. LOL) But they didn't prevent me from reacting this way. My husband always says, "why do you torture yourself by looking at the stuff." I guess I feel like by looking away I'm somehow condoning it. . . .


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## Daisy's Mommie (Sep 24, 2012)

There is evil around us in the form of living, breathing human beings. They delight in causing pain and agony to their fellow humans and do not think twice about hurting a defenseless animal or child. I know my limitations after a lot of soul searching and being stabbed in the heart and gut by devils that have been associated with my life. I can't even watch the commercials on tv from the ASPCA. I go into a shake and cry uncontrollably. Happens every time. The news got me this evening. They had a story about a mother that starved her child to death. It was 5 years old and weighed 17 lbs. This was in our immediate area. When I hear these things about precious little children and all the little fluffs (furchildren in general), I grab my little fluff angel and hug her tight and promise her that bad things will never happen to her. That bad people will never touch her and she will be loved all the days of her life. I am so proud of those of you that can do rescue. I support you with every fiber of my being and if I could, I would give each of you a hug. I just know that I would not be good at it. I would probably wind up with a houseful of babies and not be able to take the best care of them that they deserve. Finances would not allow me to get them the medical care they might 
need and I am realistic enough to know that love cannot heal. 
I don't know the answer. Is there an answer? As long as evil walks this earth, we will have these problems. All I know is this--we save everything we can, love the ones we have and pray for a day when evil will not walk this land causing death, destruction and oceans of tears. God bless all of you who have scars on your hearts for every fluff you have rescued...


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## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

LoveLucy said:


> It is overwhelming, and I don't currently work in rescue, but I follow rescue groups and the cause. I saw the photo of Buster, and started crying immediately. And then, instead of going on to something else, I keep going back and looking at him. He is beautiful. How could nobody have wanted him? Now, I also have to say, that I have always been pretty sensitive, and I cry easily, but the plight of all these poor dogs just makes me so sad and upset. When I'm done working and babysitting so much, I want to become more involved in rescue, and I, too, wonder if I can handle it. I'm going to start now by volunteering just one day a week at our local shelter. I wonder if it will make me feel better to spend time with these dogs, or if it will just destroy me emotionally. But I have to give it a try. I think the root of MY problem (and maybe yours too), is that I just can't understand how this problem is so out of control in a country that claims to care about the helpless and the vulnerable. It's just hideous. I've just never been the type of person who can just ignore things, even though I know that the solution is largely out of my control. I feel that I have to at least try to do my part to change things.
> Anyway, just wanted to say that I know EXACTLY how you feel. (And I've been off my anti-depressants for about the same amount of time as you. LOL) But they didn't prevent me from reacting this way. My husband always says, "why do you torture yourself by looking at the stuff." I guess I feel like by looking away I'm somehow condoning it. . . .


:goodpost: THANK YOU!! lol sorry, you just hit the nail on the head for me on everything. I was brought to tears as well by Buster... I can't for the life of me think of why anyone could dump that sweet baby for death... I just wish more could have been done, I should have noticed him before and shared or done something, it just hurts my heart... and I can't stop thinking about him. I just hope he had a quick, painless death. CA and NYC seems to have SO many fluffs and such a high euth. rate...  it just seems hopeless at times. My bf also asks why I torture myself and whenever he sees me looking sad on my computer/iPad he asks "are you looking at puppies again?"

I also am equally as baffled as to how it has gotten so bad, but as Sylie says, progress has been made. Maggie, I do feel good for adopting my fluffs (I have never transported or fostered) but I feel like it is just not enough, and so many others have suffered... I view things very pessimistically which is a personal problem of mine. I suppose that is why this issue is getting to me so much... it just doesn't seem to be enough. But I think I need to try and have more hope. This reminds me of "Madonna of the Mills" where the 'Madonna' (Lori, I think?) cries as she thinks of the dogs she couldn't save, despite saving hundreds already.. it is just not enough.

There is definitely evil in this world, and in this country. Just so much it is sometimes overwhelming. Sandy Hook is a the most recent example most people think of... it just boggles the mind how a human being can have such a lack of compassion for helpless beings... but at the same time it made me think... children are helpless much as domesticated animals are, yet they are slaughtered on a daily basis which is ALL LEGAL. Where is the outrage for them? Where is the national outrage for the animals who are tortured? Who are gassed everyday despite being healthy and adoptable? Or the dogs and cats dumped every single day...? I am just glad puppy mills have gained attention but people still purchase from the Internet and don't put 2 and 2 together... it is just so frustrating..

I need to start volunteering at a shelter, but I just don't know if I could take it.. not to mention guilt over working about 36 hours a week and still feeling like I don't spend enough time with my own fluffs  I should do some research anyhow... I am not sure if I could stand volunteering in a kill shelter, though I would think those animals are the ones who need human contact the most..


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## socalyte (Nov 15, 2010)

I know it's a tough thing to think about, but as Sylvia said, even little steps mean progress. Our county now has the goal of having a no kill shelter due to the efforts of animal lovers such as we. I consider that an amazing goal and tremendous step forward! So, I have to balance out my anger/sadness/depression at some of what I see and hear, and remember that each little fur-baby saved is a win. 

Though sometimes the task seems overwhelming with all the horrible stories and tragic happenings, I try to remember this story:

While walking along a beach, an elderly gentleman saw someone in the distance leaning down, picking something up and throwing it into the ocean. As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young boy, picking up starfish one by one and tossing each one gently back into the water. He came closer still and called out, “Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?”

The boy paused, looked up, and replied “Throwing starfish into the ocean.” The old man smiled, and said, “I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?” The boy replied, “The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them in, they’ll die.” Upon hearing this, the gentleman commented, “But, young man, do you not realise that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can’t possibly make a difference!”

The young boy listened politely. Then he bent down, picked up another starfish, threw it into the back into the ocean past the breaking waves and said, _*“It made a difference for that one.”*_


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## Summergirl73 (Sep 18, 2011)

Thank you for posting this thread...it was as if you read my heart. Just last night I was crying over Buster (I saw him on Facebook) and the millions of other babies who die a the hands of humans each year. I too am at the breaking point. I've considered getting off of FB all together. Instead I will start eliminating those threads from my FB feed. I've decided that though my heart is not strong enough to see their little faces each day, all day, it will not change my committment to stopping mills, kill shelters, abuse etc. I will donate. I will raise funds. I will petition. I will fight for their rights. I will pray for them. I will not see those eyes staring back at me on the screen every day though. I can't ~ it's too much and takes away from my spirit to fight for them ~ it weakens me. I think we must all find our place in the mission field. We are each blessed with different strengths and we MUST each do our part as we are called upon. I am so thankful for the rescuers, cross posters etc. They I believe are thankful for my contributions as well. We are a team, there to support in many ways.


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## LuvMyBoys (Jan 2, 2012)

Too many thought swirling around in my head to type any of them down coherently (did I spell that right?). I want to tell you that I am with you, I understand you, I feel the same overwhelming grief and hopelessness (sp???) too sometimes. (but I am still on my antidepressants...) It seems like a never ending battle for us, but we will get there, one dog and one dog owner at a time.

EDUCATION!!! We don't know what we don't know...we teach others and hopefully they will continue the chain. We alert others and save dogs and hopefully others will do the same. 

Unfortunately, we loose some, and we go home and bury our heads in our beloved baby's fur and cry and thank God for this one.


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## mss (Mar 1, 2006)

Focus on what you can actually do, not what you can not do.  And "network" in other ways. Because Facebook posting of pictures can be so upsetting. And frequently not all that helpful. ...

I like to deal with local shelters and some email lists concerning them and a limited number of rescue groups that are known to be good. 

I like the starfish story. And one person can not do it all, but each person can do something!


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## plenty pets 20 (Jul 8, 2006)

I agree with Margaret. Only way I can deal with it is to focus on our success's and one dog at a time. 
Sadly the shelters in L.A are full again, but we have some great happy saves, that take some of the sting and heart ache from the one's we cant get to.
I also want to Thank everyone on this list for the continued support of all the Rescues that you all donate to. With out you, we in Rescue could not help even a small percentage of the ones we do reach.
Just please do continue to educate the public. We are making progress and the more people hear it for many different sources, they will hopefully add their voices. Hugs,Edie


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## piratelover (Nov 11, 2012)

I agree that it is a battle that will never be won. and it is really too bad. I hate seeing all those euthanized as well. It brings pure sadness to my heart.


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## Yogi's Mom (Jan 6, 2013)

*Hello from Pa. My Heart Is Breaking. I Have The Greatest respect for all the above posts i just read. I Have Been On The Net Looking For A Rescue But Everything Is States Away From me. i live in a Oh So Small Town/Uniontown,Pa. No Maltese Are Ever In a Shelter Here. Most Cases PitBulls In My Area. The Ones I Have Tryed To Get Were All Scams.*
*I Hope You Find Some Peace Today,Just Knowing How Much You Care.*

*My Prayers Are For Your Peace Of Mind/Buster Is At Rest!*


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