# Separation Anxiety-HELP ME/US!



## PauliesMom (Jun 13, 2009)

Little Paulie is 7 months old. He was flown in (hand-carried) from a reputable breeder in a different state. He has adjusted to his new home, seems quite happy and content (no kids, just hubby and I). HOWEVER... he follows me around, at my heels, ALL DAY, EVERY DAY. Honestly... I am so afraid I am going to fall down the stairs or trip over him. I work from home so other than errands, I am basically here 24/7. Every time I turn around, he is at my feet - standing - not even sitting - looking up at me. I'm very active around here...don't sit still for long. This is so frustrating. I love him dearly, but my patience is wearing thin. It's like wearing a ball and chain - CONSTANTLY! I play fetch with him several times a day. I hold him if I am sitting still periodically throughout the day (not excessively). He has chew toys, stuffed toys, etc. He shy's away from guests... by hiding behind me as they try to pick him up or befriend him. Our previous Maltese was independent and outgoing, so this is all new to me. I understand he IS a puppy, but I feel I should address this while he still is a puppy. I want him to feel secure. Again, I/we love him dearly. If my hubby takes him down to the basement with him, he cries and scratches to go back up to where he can see me. We are in the process of training him the basics, sit, stay, heal, etc. He tests us, like any puppy, with disciplinary issues... chewing shoes, etc. It takes some work, but for the most part he usually adheres. Any suggestions? Is there a good book/website pertaining to this? I realize behaviour is very breed specific, so I thought I'd start here. Thanks in advance for ANY help!


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## jmm (Nov 23, 2004)

I'll Be Home Soon by Patricia McConnell (dogwise.com)

Although it is hard for us people, it is good for dogs to learn they can be separated from us. My dogs are with me all day (they even go to work with me), but I do make a point to put them up for part of the day. You can put him on a schedule to include your time to do chores during which he is penned/gated/crated. 

The issue with new people is lack of socialization. He needs to get into a basic obedience class and you need to actively take him out of the house and expose him to new people (new people toss tasty treats that he never gets any other time).


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## PauliesMom (Jun 13, 2009)

OH MY - *Thanks so much for the response*... we will get that book!


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## LUCY N PETS (Apr 21, 2009)

:Welcome 2: Glad you joined us, can't wait to see pictures of your Little Paulie and some of your experiences and stories.

From :Sunny Smile: Florida,
Lucy


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## CeeCee's Mom (Sep 14, 2006)

Good luck with your problem......He is darling!!! Welcome, so glad you have joined us!!!!! :welcome1:


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## princessre (Dec 23, 2008)

I asked my trainer the same question because I work from home when I don't have meetings. She has me putting him in his crate a couple hours in the morning and a couple hours in the afternoon. Puppies need alot of sleep anyways. I think those few hours will train him to be independent and let you feel alot more space in your life for just you.


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## PauliesMom (Jun 13, 2009)

Thanks for the warm welcome! And the suggestion. I will try that.

Also... I love all the photos... so cute! These pooches have a better wardrobe than me! lol


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## camfan (Oct 30, 2006)

Hi & welcome. What you're describing isn't necessarily separation anxiety. There's a lot more to it than what you're describing. What you're describing sounds a lot like typical Maltese behavior, actually. My Ollie is pretty independant but he still does the following me EVERYWHERE bit and I have heard the same from many, many other members here. 

I agree w/ JMM. Socialize him, train him and give him the opportunity to be away from you every day. I used to be a SAHM and was with Ollie practically 24/7 but with two young kids it gave me enough time to be out of the house here and there for him to get used to us being gone. Now I'm working and gone all day and he's had to adjust. I've had a much harder time at it than he has, lol. We got him a "friend" our rescue "YoYo" who is with him during the day now. I he'd be fine even without YoYo, but I like having them together during the days.

Best of luck!


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## godiva goddess (Nov 19, 2007)

QUOTE (princessre @ Jun 13 2009, 10:51 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=790611


> I asked my trainer the same question because I work from home when I don't have meetings. She has me putting him in his crate a couple hours in the morning and a couple hours in the afternoon. Puppies need alot of sleep anyways. I think those few hours will train him to be independent and let you feel alot more space in your life for just you.[/B]


This is great advice!! 

Mia follows me everywhere too..but when she first came home w/ me, she would cry/whine if I leave her..I was miserable..she was too! I couldnt stand hearing her cry and call for me..so I called my breeder and he basically told me what Princessre wrote..a couple hrs a day, at a set time, I would put Mia in her play pen, alone. That was her "alone time." She cried in the beginning but eventually, she got over it. lol..Now, she is fine being alone! You would be amazed how quickly our babies learn! The beginning is always very hard..but you need to be persistent!


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## CrystalAndZoe (Jul 11, 2006)

QUOTE (camfan @ Jun 14 2009, 11:09 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=790754


> Hi & welcome. What you're describing isn't necessarily separation anxiety. There's a lot more to it than what you're describing. What you're describing sounds a lot like typical Maltese behavior, actually. My Ollie is pretty independant but he still does the following me EVERYWHERE bit and I have heard the same from many, many other members here.
> 
> I agree w/ JMM. Socialize him, train him and give him the opportunity to be away from you every day. I used to be a SAHM and was with Ollie practically 24/7 but with two young kids it gave me enough time to be out of the house here and there for him to get used to us being gone. Now I'm working and gone all day and he's had to adjust. I've had a much harder time at it than he has, lol. We got him a "friend" our rescue "YoYo" who is with him during the day now. I he'd be fine even without YoYo, but I like having them together during the days.
> 
> Best of luck![/B]


I agree. What you're describing is pretty normal for a new little one coming into a new home/family. Remember that toy breeds are bred to be companion dogs so they naturally want to be with their people. But you do want to be careful not to allow that instinct to turn into separation anxiety. Follow JMM's advice. Good luck!


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## PauliesMom (Jun 13, 2009)

camfan - OMG - your little sweetie looks SO MUCH like Paulie! It's amazing! Thanks for the advice. I appreciate it.

godiva - Thanks... you're so right! Mia is a doll!

Crystal - Your two are too cute! And thanks... you are so right... toy breeds are companions...I needed that reminder!
-----------------------------

I really appreciate an opportunity to vent about this. Venting is probably 80% of the solution! lol And reading your posts has helped in many ways. Thank you - to all of you... Paulie is such a sweetie... hubby and I love him lots! He is absolutely ADORABLE! Now... if I could figure out how to add some photos to my posts! lol


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## Moxie'smom (Dec 16, 2007)

We also found at this stage, as in any stage exercise is very important. The more tired they are the more tired they are..LOL
And walking will expose them to all sorts of things. Very important part of socialization. We brought Mox into the office and let everyone hold him. Now, I can hand him to anybody and he won't just want his mommy. I agree with Jackie with the puppy classes. As soon as he has all the shots, look into a puppy social and/or puppy classes. They make a world of difference. And you will also find that at this age a few minutes training also tired out their little minds. And he won't be as "Needy"

Good luck.


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## Moxie'smom (Dec 16, 2007)

QUOTE (godiva goddess @ Jun 14 2009, 11:47 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=790771


> QUOTE (princessre @ Jun 13 2009, 10:51 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=790611





> I asked my trainer the same question because I work from home when I don't have meetings. She has me putting him in his crate a couple hours in the morning and a couple hours in the afternoon. Puppies need alot of sleep anyways. I think those few hours will train him to be independent and let you feel alot more space in your life for just you.[/B]


This is great advice!! 

Mia follows me everywhere too..but when she first came home w/ me, she would cry/whine if I leave her..I was miserable..she was too! I couldnt stand hearing her cry and call for me..so I called my breeder and he basically told me what Princessre wrote..a couple hrs a day, at a set time, I would put Mia in her play pen, alone. That was her "alone time." She cried in the beginning but eventually, she got over it. lol..Now, she is fine being alone! You would be amazed how quickly our babies learn! The beginning is always very hard..but you need to be persistent!
[/B][/QUOTE]


I remember our phone conversations!... brings back many memories :biggrin: ...xxxoooo, Auntie leslie


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## sofiesmama (Oct 7, 2008)

Is that little Paulie from Divinity Maltese? He is a carbon copy of my Samson which I suppose isn't extraordinary considering they were littermates. 

Samson was kind of clingy when he first arrived home as well. I think he was just used to being around his littermates and Claudia most of the day. I worked with a trainer to deal with his separation anxiety. Mostly, it was just practicing short bursts of him being in his x-pen or crate (in the other room) with verbal corrections for any unwanted barking or whining, followed by praise as soon as he stopped the unwanted behavior. I was amazed - there were major improvements and they happened pretty quickly.

Best of luck to you and Paulie!


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## PauliesMom (Jun 13, 2009)

Thanks again for all the adive/suggestions!

Sophie'sMom - YES... it was Divinity! I think Sampson and Paulie are siblings... we did get him from Claudia. My hubby logged on here right after Paulie was delivered to us and he told me about Sampson possibly being his sibling. Pualie is absolutely adorable! And honestly... like I mentioned in a previous post, I think venting about this has really helped! lol Not only is he adjusting to us, but we are adjusting to him. Hands down... he is a joy. The best part... in the morning... before we get out of bed, he loves to play kissy face! lol He rolls on his back and "paws" at my face. He is so adorable. I will post Paulie's baby photo when I learn how to do it... thanks for answering my post!


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