# please say a prayer...



## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

I have posted before about the problems I have had with Mia and Kissi not being compatable. I have done everything I know to do and things have not improved. My family and my vet both agreed that it is time for a change. As I have stated before this has been such a hard decision for me. I promised myself when my husband gave me Kissi that she would come first...no matter what...and I feel like I have been very selfish and not very true to that promise. I have had Mia almost a year, and I love her dearly but it has become painfully obvious that things are not going to improve and that Kissi is much happier when she is not with Mia. This whole thing is breaking my heart. I talked with her breeder several weeks ago because I don't want to make a mistake and place her with the wrong person. The breeder has agreed to take Mia back and keep her. She is going to have her evaluated and maybe show her...she is a little on the big side but has a beautiful head and her coat is gorgeous. She has offered me another puppy if I should decide to try again...not an option... all I want is for Mia to be loved. I know this is the best move for Kissi and my family but I feel soooo guilty because I can't explain what is going on to Mia. I have to pack her things today because she is leaving tomorrow...this is so hard. Mia is not a dog that has been neglected...she has had lots of love, the best food, homemade treats, and excellent vet care. She sleeps with me (and pushes Kissi out of the bed), has more toys, clothes and "bling" than most children...yes I am that CRAZY lady that treats her dogs like family, so to me this is like giving away a child. Please say a little prayer that I am doing the right thing for all concerned and that I get through the next two days.
Linda


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## Deanna (Jan 14, 2005)

Linda, I know this has been a strugle for you (and Kissi) since you got Mia. One of the most heart breaking things about loving a dog is that you can't tell them what is happening. Mia is well adjusted, well loved, and confident- just the type of girl that can handle going to a new home. I am so glad that the breeder is going to take her back. I hope she keeps her and doesn't move her again. 

I know this is a sad time for you, but Kissi has had such a tough year, and soon you will have your Kissi back. 

Please take care of yourself and try not to feel guilty.


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## Furbaby's Mommie (Jul 10, 2004)

It is so obvious that Mia was loved and cared for just like Kissi while she was there, so don't feel guilty about letting her go back to her birth home. Of course you will miss her terribly! but she will be happy and loved.























Can they show her with a diagnosed patella problem? Or was that just an injury?


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## Ladysmom (Oct 19, 2004)

I know how hard this decision has been for you, but Kissi was there first so she has to come first. How brave of you to post your atory. Maybe someone out there who is considering another Malt will think about the reality that it isn't always for the best.

I'm glad your breeder is taking Mia back. That sounds like a good solution.


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## casa verde maltese (Apr 7, 2007)

I'll be thinking of you and praying for peace with your decision. I know it was hard - but you are doing what is best for Kissi, Mia and your family. It reads like you've tried so many alternatives and you've thought about it a great deal - so you are making the best decision for all.


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## Alvar's Mom (Mar 5, 2007)

what a very very difficult decision







sounds like you're making the best decision for all and it's great that the breeder will be taking Mia back.


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## Scoobydoo (May 26, 2005)

I know exactly what you are going through, I admire your courage, love and thought for Mia and Kissi, I am sure you have anguished over this for some time and your love for both is very obvious








I too have had the same thoughts at times about Koko, he is so bossy and also pushes poor Scooby away all the time, trying to establish himself as the alfa. When Scooby was so very sick I went throught the very same anguish thinking Koko was too much for Scooby at the time and I too almost decided to rehome Koko, but I just couldn't brind myself to go through with it, I love them both so very much. 
The only reason we haven't come to the same decision as you have is that there are more times now that the two boys do enjoy eachother, had they not made some progress in their relationship I too would have to make the same very tough decision out of love for both boys, just as you are doing for your two girls








I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers along with Kissi and Mia


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

Hats off to you for doing what needs to be done. That alone shows the love you have for BOTH babies.


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## Tanner's Mom (May 27, 2005)

I'm so sorry it didn't work out, but you're being a good Mommy and doing what's best for both Mia & Kissi.


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## Bonnie's Mommie (Mar 2, 2006)

It's sad for all of you, but I think it's great (and says a lot about the breeder) that she is going back to her first home. You know without a doubt that she will be in a good home and will be loved.


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## MissMelanie (Feb 13, 2006)

I am sorry for you that it had to come to this. I wish you a swift journey though the painful time this is and I wish Mia a happy transition to her new home.









Melanie


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## I found nemo (Feb 23, 2006)

You did the right thing..I just know Mia will find that special place..
Be proud of yourself for giving Mia another chance to be happy...
Andrea


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## Jada (Jan 31, 2007)

I am so sorry for you and your little Mia. It sounds like you truly love your little ones, otherwise you wouldn't do this. I am sure that the breeder will find her a great home and she will be happy. My heart truly goes out to you.


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## momtoboo (Jan 30, 2006)

I'm sorry it didn't work out with Mia.You tried hard to make it work but it just wasn't meant to be. I hope Kissi gets back to normal & that Mia does well & has a happy life.


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## Krystal (Feb 3, 2007)

I am very sorry to hear this, but I think Mia will be a lot happier. I cant imagine what you are going through, but just keep in mind that it is what is best for everyone. You are very lucky that your breeder is taking her back, at least you know she will be well cared for and loved! My prayers are with you and your family tonight!


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Linda - this is the brave (and the right) thing to do. Both Kissi and Mia will be happier without each other. Although I'm sure that both would prefer to stay with you and be your only dog, Kissi was there first and is the one to keep - no question. And since Mia's breeder is taking her back, she won't have to go through a lot of readjusting.

When I bred Lhasas, this occassionally happened and I always took my babies back. They readjusted in no time so believe me that Mia will be just fine.

And now, all of your attention can be focused on Kissi which is all that she wants.


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## CrystalAndZoe (Jul 11, 2006)

<span style="font-family:Comic Sans Ms">I'm so sorry.







I know how hard this is and that it is very easy to feel like a failure. I know from several of your posts to what great lengths you have gone through to try and make this work. You have done everything you could possibly do and this is truly a loving thing for both babies. I pray for peace and healing for you and for Mia to adjust to her new family very quickly.</span>


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## dogloverx3 (Apr 14, 2006)

So sorry to hear this - but I hope Kissi returns to her old self . Sarah


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## Gemma (Jan 19, 2006)

Awww, I'm sorry







but you are doing the right thing for everybody in your family


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## msmagnolia (Sep 8, 2004)

I am very sorry that you and Mia and Kissi have had to go through so much. I feel sure that the breeder is the best choice in this situation. She will then be able to evaluate Mia's behavior and hopefully place her in the right home. Was Mia not spayed? I think the only way she can be shown is if she is intact. I might be wrong though.

PS. I suspect my Sadie might rather be a single dog. She gets along ok with Hope but I think that Hope bothers her a lot of the time. Hope, on the other hand, loves all dogs and wants to be friends with everyone. That is how Sassy was, too. Having now had 3 maltese, I am very sure that I like it better when pups like having a sibling. In the future I will probably continue to look for maltese who are about 6 months and have been around other Maltese to try and ensure that they will like and accept other pups. And since this is important to me I will probably not ever have just one....so that they don't get used to being a singleton. That is simply my preference.....I am not suggesting that you have done anything wrong. Seeing what you and some of the others have gone through, I know that I did the right thing to hurry up and get Hope after Sassy died so that Sadie wouldn't get used to being an only.


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## Tina (Aug 6, 2006)

Linda,

Be proud of yourself. You knew you had a problem and you are taking action to rectify it. I am glad the breeder is accepting her back.












Tina


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

I hope everything works out for all conerned.


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## bellasmommy (May 8, 2005)

I'm so sorry for the pain you're feeling. If you need to talk feel free to PM me, I had a similar situation and had to rehome my Harley a while ago. You will be glad to know both girls are so much happier now and its so obvious to me now that they are completely happy and just needed to be in single dog homes. I wish you peace and rest, give kissi a hug and look forward to things getting better.


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

> It is so obvious that Mia was loved and cared for just like Kissi while she was there, so don't feel guilty about letting her go back to her birth home. Of course you will miss her terribly! but she will be happy and loved.
> 
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The patella problem is from an injury and we are hoping for a full recovery...there has already been quite a bit of improvement.



> I know exactly what you are going through, I admire your courage, love and thought for Mia and Kissi, I am sure you have anguished over this for some time and your love for both is very obvious
> 
> 
> 
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Thanks for understanding...I am glad that your two are getting along so you don't have to go through the guilt that I am feeling.
Linda


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

> I am very sorry that you and Mia and Kissi have had to go through so much. I feel sure that the breeder is the best choice in this situation. She will then be able to evaluate Mia's behavior and hopefully place her in the right home. Was Mia not spayed? I think the only way she can be shown is if she is intact. I might be wrong though.
> 
> PS. I suspect my Sadie might rather be a single dog. She gets along ok with Hope but I think that Hope bothers her a lot of the time. Hope, on the other hand, loves all dogs and wants to be friends with everyone. That is how Sassy was, too. Having now had 3 maltese, I am very sure that I like it better when pups like having a sibling. In the future I will probably continue to look for maltese who are about 6 months and have been around other Maltese to try and ensure that they will like and accept other pups. And since this is important to me I will probably not ever have just one....so that they don't get used to being a singleton. That is simply my preference.....I am not suggesting that you have done anything wrong. Seeing what you and some of the others have gone through, I know that I did the right thing to hurry up and get Hope after Sassy died so that Sadie wouldn't get used to being an only.[/B]


No Mia is not spayed. We have had compatability issues from the beginning and I knew that the best hope for the breeder taking her back if necessary was if she was intact and able to show her. She is very pretty and has a wonderful coat and good pigment. As for my girls wanting to be singletons...that is not really the issue. Kissi loves to play with other dogs (gentle dogs) and so does Mia...the problem is Mia is very "busy", dominant and plays very rough...Kissi is just the opposite. Mia is also very possessive of me...and she outweighs Kissi by close to 3 lbs so Kissi's only recourse is to retreat to the bedroom and hide. They got into it about 2am in our bed last week because Kissi was snuggled up asleep with me and Mia apparently did not like it... 
Linda


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## TheButtercup (Mar 3, 2005)

linda, no guilt! it sounds like you have a win-win situation all around. Kissy will be able to be an only baby, which she relishes, and Mia will be placed/kept in a home where which she can thrive. it's no knock on YOU... not at ALL! it's just how these babies are. some are definitely "only children".... like the buttercup. as much as i want a second, she would just not be the same buttercup if i brought anther one in. 

bellasmommy went thru a very similar situation not long ago, she had a yorkie that she rehomed, and all parties are happy now







(see, i may not always reply, but i pay attention!!!!)






































it's all good


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## 3Maltmom (May 23, 2005)

I wish the very best for you, Kissi, and Mia. 

I don't know your breeder, but am a little concerned that this will be the second time you have placed her, unspayed. I thought you were having her spayed earlier this year. 

I'm not judging at all. My thoughts, and prayers, are with you. 

I just don't understand the breeder. Why was Mia sold without a spay contract? 

I'm more curious about the breeder. What happened with the first time you let Mia go? Why would your breeder allow that?


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

Thanks to everyone for your kind words and understanding. I spent the afternoon bathing and brushing Miss Mia so she will look pretty and smell sweet tomorrow. I packed her food, her favorite bed, her cutest clothes and favorite toys and baked her favorite peanut butter cookies to send with her. I have all of her paperwork ready so I guess all that is left is saying good-bye. She knows something is wrong, I have spent a good part of today crying...and tonite she is stuck to me like glue. Tomorrow is going to be a very hard day...I will miss her...
Linda


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

> I wish the very best for you, Kissi, and Mia.
> 
> I don't know your breeder, but am a little concerned that this will be the second time you have placed her, unspayed. I thought you were having her spayed earlier this year.
> 
> ...


I purchased Mia as a "show prospect"...my daughter planned to try and show her but that did not work out. When we did a "trial" placement earlier this year, it was to someone interested in showing her. I had the breeders permission. That person had me totally fooled. She had a little male maltese that she had been showing who was diagnosed with severe liver problems, she got another male from the same breeder and that pup also has severe liver problems. She was a "friend" and I truly thought this might be a really good home for Mia. She has several rescues and does therapy work, agility, etc. with them. When I made it clear that I was not giving her a "uterus" and that I would retain control (with a contract) until we saw how things went in the show ring, etc., her interest seemed to change. I gladly brought Mia home...
Linda


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## starry (Sep 4, 2006)

> Thanks to everyone for your kind words and understanding. I spent the afternoon bathing and brushing Miss Mia so she will look pretty and smell sweet tomorrow. I packed her food, her favorite bed, her cutest clothes and favorite toys and baked her favorite peanut butter cookies to send with her. I have all of her paperwork ready so I guess all that is left is saying good-bye. She knows something is wrong, I have spent a good part of today crying...and tonite she is stuck to me like glue. Tomorrow is going to be a very hard day...I will miss her...
> Linda[/B]


I can't imagine how hard this is for you and hopefully Mia will adjust quickly.
That was so good you didn't let her stay w/ the show breeder w/male liver problem malts.
Mia would've been in for a prego life for sure!








I know what u mean about them not getting along, my Lhasa hurt my malt tonite bc she is crabby and didn't want to play. That really upset me that Holly was hurt and would move her leg for a while. Im scared she instigated a patella problem!
How did Mia's patella get hurt? I want to be on the look out, as if I don't stress everyminute of the day as Holly runs all over and now jumps up on the beds w/out using the doggystairs AND will jump off the stairway over the last one even!
Some dogs are just agressive more than others and I understand how hard it is for you.It sounds like u were a very good mommy to Mia and Im sure bc she is young she will adjust to her new surrondings. Maybe she will think she is at camp being there will be other dogs..
Good Luck and Hugs to you both. Let us know how things are when u can..


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

> > index.php?act=findpost&pid=379815
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## phesty (May 30, 2006)

I've been thinking about you and praying for this time to go as smoothly as possible. I can't imagine the pain you're dealing with, but you know that you're doing the best thing for both dogs and that's what's important.


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## msmagnolia (Sep 8, 2004)

You poor thing! I'll be thinking of you today. I know how miserable it must be to have to do this. I think I understand....Kissi would have done OK with a gentler dog. She would probably love Hope. She loves to play, but she never makes physical contact. She just runs by Sadie with toys and runs up to her, etc., trying to entice her. If you ever try again (and I know you don't want to think about that now), maybe an older pup or a retiree???

I'll just bet that your breeder will be able to find the perfect home for Mia, unless she does keep her for herself.


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

Thinking of you...hope you are doing okay.


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

I thought I would send an update on Mia.. I met the breeder today around lunchtime. She had a friend with her, her granddaughter and her handler. Mia was scared to death I am sure and is probably very confused as to why she did not come home with me but was very friendly and gave lots of kisses. The breeder called me a little while ago to give me an update because she knew how hard this was for me. So far Mia is doing really well...she immediately attached herself to her older brother (who is the King of the household)...and they are apparently inseperable tonite. The handler was very complimentary of Mia, she couldn't believe her coat and of course her beautiful eyes. Mia, who does not particularly like kids, apparently fell in love with the grand-daughter (almost 5 yrs old) and the feeling is mutual (they shared many kisses on the way home and played all afternoon). She said when Mia got tired she got up on the sofa with her brother and took a nap. The breeder wants to show Mia but she also wants to start her grand-daughter as a jr. handler and has been looking for the right dog for her...Mia might just fit the bill. She is very feminine looking but is a little heavier boned than some maltese and is not a particularly nervous dog. If this turns out to be the case then it is the absolute best possible situation for Mia. She will get tons of attention, and I know she will be well cared for. 
I had a hard afternoon...I actually came home and cried myself to sleep...in the middle of the day!!!...I don't ever remember that happening before!! Anyway, I feel better tonite since Mia seems to be okay.
.
Thanks for all the support ...it really helps to have a place to go and put your thoughts into words and have someone understand.
Linda

p.s. by the time I gave the breeder all of the paperwork, food, meds, etc. the handler and the grand-daughter had already tried three different outfits on Miss Mia before settling on the "right" one...Mia totally enjoyed all the attention...I told them she is kinda like a hairy barbie doll!!


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## msmagnolia (Sep 8, 2004)

Linda,
Thanks for taking time on a really hard day to update us. I think that I speak for many people in saying that I've had you and Mia on my mind all day. I really think that dogs are resiliant and with a lot of love and attention I'm sure Mia will be just fine. I hope you will not be too hard on yourself.


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## phesty (May 30, 2006)

Oh, it sounds like things are going as good as possible!! That's awesome! Of course, it's still really difficult for you, and don't feel bad about crying. You're grieving the loss of a relationship, which is just as hard as death in many situations. 

Thanks for the update, I've been thinking about you all day.


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## miko's mommy (Feb 8, 2005)

It sounds as though things went well. I can't even imagine how hard this must be for you. Thank you for sharing your story with us...I think it makes a lots of us think twice about getting another dog.


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## starry (Sep 4, 2006)

Oh I also thought of you today and all the sweet things you had lovingly packed for Mia.
Im sure you are so drained and it was a VERY hard day for you.








It sounds like Mia is getting alot of attention and soon will be so involved with her new situation she'll be just fine.
Keep us informed on if she gets to be shown! 
You did the right thing letting her breeder have her it sounds like.
Take Care and don't be too hard on yourself. 
Like my friend said.. "You have to try things to see if you can do them." Sorry if that doesn't make too much sense but what I mean is you may have always felt guilty for not getting Kissi a friend and now you know.


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

It sounds like Mia will be fine...that is great news. How is Kissi doing?


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Linda -- it sounds like Mia is getting settled in, as I was sure she would, back with the breeder. I'm sure she remembers her breeder and other siblings at the house.

How is Kissi doing? Is she happier? I sure hope so. I know that it must have been very, very hard for you, but you need to concentrate on little Kissi now. She's your forever baby and wants and needs all of your attention. 

Mia is fine and is getting love and attention from the breeder and her family -- so concentrate on Kissi. Spend time loving her and letting her know how very, very special she is.


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## casa verde maltese (Apr 7, 2007)

It reads like Mia is in a great situation and that she has quickly made friends (people and maltese). I do hope the jr. handling works out for them (it sounds really cute).

You did the right thing for all involved. You are amazing for making it happen, even though it was going to be hard and hurt.









Take care of yourself.


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## Furbaby's Mommie (Jul 10, 2004)

Hi Linda, I am thinking about you and hope you are doing O.K. today. I know it must be the hardest thing you've ever done to let Mia go. It sounds like she will have a nice life and get the attention she needs too. Take care!


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

Thanks so much for the upate. If not in your home, Mia is definitely in the next best place. It sounds like she is already enjoying her new family. I'm so sorry you're going through such pain. Just put your thoughts to Kissi and how she will enjoy sleeping with you tonight with no fear of being booted out of her spot!


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## Boobookit (Dec 3, 2005)

Marie & the Boys


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

Hi everyone, just thought I'd update you on Mia and Kissi. 
My husband and I took Kissi and went to the Bay this past weekend. I just didn't want to be home...everywhere I looked there was a reminder of Mia. Anyway, Kissi is doing really well. I don't think I have been out of her sight for more than a few minutes all weekend. When she knows I am upset she sticks to me like glue. Since we came home this evening I think she is looking for Mia but honestly, she seems much more contented...she has come out of hiding and is rejoining the family. As for Mia, I talked with the breeder briefly this evening...she is doing okay. She is used to being fed twice a day (Merrick canned, veggies, cottage cheese + dry kibble and sometimes chicken & rice)) and in her new situation she has to get used to free feeding kibble...and sharing several (?) plates of chicken, rice etc....this is going to take some getting used to for Mia I am sure. Also, she is having some potty issues...she has been going potty in her crate at nite which she NEVER did at home. The only thing I can think of is she probably puts her in the crate earlier than Mia is used to going to bed...I stay up late everynite and my dogs don't go to bed until I do. I am sure she just needs to get used to "holding it" which she never had to do here...I always keep a p-p-pad available.
Anyway, it sounds "so far" like the right choice for both dogs...I hope so...because I really miss the little stinker. 
Linda


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## casa verde maltese (Apr 7, 2007)

Hang in there!


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)




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## bellasmommy (May 8, 2005)

I know the feeling well enough to know nothing I can say will help much right now, but it will get better. I'm glad to hear Kissi's coming back out of her shell


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## beckybc03 (Jul 6, 2006)

I can't even imagine how hard this is for you


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## paris (Apr 8, 2005)

Linda, how are you and Kissi doing?


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## Kissi's Mom (Apr 21, 2006)

> Linda, how are you and Kissi doing?[/B]


Thanks for asking...Kissi and I are doing fine. I feel kinda guilty because I am truly enjoying our one-on-one time. Although, I actually feel pretty good about the decision tonite...I talked with the breeder this evening and Mia is doing really well. She has settled in quickly and has lots of new friends (relatives). She has been checked out by the breeder's vet and got good news about her leg (luxating patella injury), it is pretty much back to normal ...YEAH!! She is being a very good little girl and has become best friends with the breeder's grand-daughter, which makes me very proud. Only one of the breeder's other dogs likes the little girl...but my Mia knows no fear!! My daughter says that maybe I was meant to have Mia just long enough for her to be confident enough to be this little girls friend. Mia loves attention and apparently is getting lots so she probably doesn't miss me at all. I still miss her...especially at nite...and even though it was a hard decision I think it was the right decision.
Thanks again,
Linda


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## Carole (Nov 1, 2005)

Can't think of a more difficult decision for a Malt lover to have to make. 
Hugs to you, Linda...







...and prayers that Mia will have a good life.


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