# Socializing Tips Wanted!



## LilyTheBoston (Apr 5, 2019)

Hi everyone! Now, I know that my pup isn’t a Maltese (it was a toss up between the breeds) but everyone here seems lovely and I already have an account.
If I am intruding, I sincerely apologize.

I have a 5 month old male chihuahua puppy that I brought home when he was 9 weeks old.

He is 100% potty trained when he’s in one room, but roaming the house he still has occasional accidents and also pees when overly nervous/excited. He was easy to train and knows a lot of tricks and the basic commands and such!
The issue I’m having is with socializing. He’s always been a shy/nervous puppy although he seemed to be more confident then his brother when I picked him out. I was determined to have a well socialized confident dog so I took him places at least three times a week where I tried my best to let him go at his preferred pace of very timidly sniffing people’s fingers once in awhile but running away if they moved and never letting anyone pet him and running into to my lap and climbing onto my shoulder when he was done and refusing to walk on his leash around anything he dubbed scary.

Unfortunately, he really hasn’t progressed in the past few months. He will walk on his leash past most things/people without asking to be picked up (I want him to have a safe “out” so he feels secure so I always pick him up if he asks) or trying to dart away which is huge for him! But if people look at, talk to, or reach for him at all (even to offer a treat or hand to sniff) he gets very upset. He wants nothing to do with anybody but me although he does like my mother now which is a relief as she’s over often.
Now, I don’t need a dog that loves everyone, I’d just like him to not be so afraid of people for his own well being. I’ve continued taking him places, doing training sessions in public, and trying to get him to be ok with taking offered treats. But he isn’t. He will not go anywhere near people treats or not unless they’re ignoring him completely and I coax him to stand or sit next to me. The closest I can get him to go to a stranger is about a foot and a half if they’re quiet, ignoring him, and I have a great treat and reward him heavily.

He doesn’t bark, although he has started barking 2-3 times when people come in and then stands six feet away making noise under his breath such as quiet grumbling and “talking”. I really don’t want him to turn into a barker either.

He’s not my first dog at all, and I know that chihuahuas are typically one person dogs. I’m just wondering if I’m going about socializing him correctly? My goal is for him to be relaxed with people around him/in the room. I have no problems with him not wanting to be touched or interactive with other people, just not so on edge and scared.

Has anyone else had a puppy like this? How did they turn out?

I apologize for how long this is

(I don’t believe his breeder socialized him much at all)

EDIT: He is currently about 3.5 pounds so quite tiny


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## maddysmom (Mar 8, 2012)

Welcone💐 I cant think of a thing to suggest, other than everything you are doing or tried already. Maybe its just going to be his temperament, idk. He is still so young. The only thing I would worry about is that fearful dogs can easily turn to biting. I have one of those and its not easy.
Im sorry. Im not of any help~hopefully someone else sees your post and comments.


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## LilyTheBoston (Apr 5, 2019)

maddysmom said:


> Welcone💐 I cant think of a thing to suggest, other than everything you are doing or tried already. Maybe its just going to be his temperament, idk. He is still so young. The only thing I would worry about is that fearful dogs can easily turn to biting. I have one of those and its not easy.
> Im sorry. Im not of any help~hopefully someone else sees your post and comments.


Thank you so much for the warm welcome!

I do worry about it turning into fear biting. I had someone come up and stroke his back without his nor my permission while I was holding him twice, and it set his progress back so far that I couldn’t stand near people whilst holding him without him shaking, flaking, and looking around 24/7 struggling to be set down then trying to run if I did set him down. Sigh. The next person to reach for him did get snapped at. People can be so frustrating especially since I always tell them not to touch him and have no problem reminding them.

Thankfully it hasn’t happened since.


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## mss (Mar 1, 2006)

Maybe for a while he should just socialize with people you know and are confident will act appropriately. Or go with another person who can run interference. Or just walk and keep moving. lol He is still young, so still go slow since he is showing fear.

My first Maltese, in the first few days I had him, was deliberately terrorized by an old man who lived in my apartment building. He said my dog needed to learn who was boss. While I was carrying him around. I am sure he had dementia, so I didn't know what to do to undo it but try to avoid him.


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## mss (Mar 1, 2006)

Maybe get a satchel shoulder bag or to carry him when needed so people are less able to touch him without permission.


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## LilyTheBoston (Apr 5, 2019)

mss said:


> Maybe for a while he should just socialize with people you know and are confident will act appropriately. Or go with another person who can run interference. Or just walk and keep moving. lol He is still young, so still go slow since he is showing fear.
> 
> My first Maltese, in the first few days I had him, was deliberately terrorized by an old man who lived in my apartment building. He said my dog needed to learn who was boss. While I was carrying him around. I am sure he had dementia, so I didn't know what to do to undo it but try to avoid him.


Those three times in one day were the only times people have touched him without permission, and they were people I knew and didn’t expect to act inappropriately. They seemed to be overtaken by the “need” to touch him because he was so tiny despite my blatant instructions. Arg.

I’m definitely going as s l o w as he needs. Obviously getting pushed out of his comfort zone at all sets him back tremendously so I really am being very careful.

A bag could actually be a really good idea! I’ll look into ordering one for sure.


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## maddysmom (Mar 8, 2012)

You need to get him a t-shirt warning people, because no matter how many times you tell people, they dont listen. I literally have to stop people, even after I warn them.


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## LilyTheBoston (Apr 5, 2019)

maddysmom said:


> You need to get him a t-shirt warning people, because no matter how many times you tell people, they dont listen. I literally have to stop people, even after I warn them.
> View attachment 276422


Unfortunately he HATES clothing, collars, and harnesses of any sort. Step in harnesses that are quick to get on he’s a lot better with. Collars (for id or cute factor only) are a huge no, and even trying to get a shirt/coat of any kind on him is impossible. I’m working on it with positive reinforcement but it’s going extremely slow. 
He knows a harness means outside time, but if it buckled around his neck or has to go over his head he completely flips out...I bought him a sweatshirt since we have horrible winters here and haven’t been able to even get him to stick his head through the neck hole yet. But he will come sniff it while I’m holding it and let me touch him with it a little bit which is improvement.

He’s still too small for any harnesses you can put “DO NOT PET” patches on as well. Maybe I could buy sew on patches and sew them to his current step in harness?


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## maddysmom (Mar 8, 2012)

LilyTheBoston said:


> Unfortunately he HATES clothing, collars, and harnesses of any sort. Step in harnesses that are quick to get on he’s a lot better with. Collars (for id or cute factor only) are a huge no, and even trying to get a shirt/coat of any kind on him is impossible. I’m working on it with positive reinforcement but it’s going extremely slow.
> He knows a harness means outside time, but if it buckled around his neck or has to go over his head he completely flips out...I bought him a sweatshirt since we have horrible winters here and haven’t been able to even get him to stick his head through the neck hole yet. But he will come sniff it while I’m holding it and let me touch him with it a little bit which is improvement.
> 
> He’s still too small for any harnesses you can put “DO NOT PET” patches on as well. Maybe I could buy sew on patches and sew them to his current step in harness?


oh, what a little stinker! He sounds just like my Ling Ling!

Btw…ijust noticed your username. Are you from Boston area?


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## LilyTheBoston (Apr 5, 2019)

maddysmom said:


> oh, what a little stinker! He sounds just like my Ling Ling!
> 
> Btw…ijust noticed your username. Are you from Boston area?


No, I have a Boston Terrier cross named Lily.


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## maddysmom (Mar 8, 2012)

LilyTheBoston said:


> No, I have a Boston Terrier cross named Lily.


Ha! when you said you had horrible winters, my first thought was Boston. Sooo much better to have a BT than live here in Boston 😉


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