# you are too involved with your dogs...



## shellbeme (Mar 1, 2011)

What does that even mean? My mother said that to me when I called her about Rocky yesterday. She has dogs of her own that she loves dearly. I just don't get it.

I do stuff with them. I groom them, train them, walk them, go on trips with them. Yes I freak out when they get sick. What is wrong with loving my dogs? I didn't get them to stick in a kennel all day or just for eye candy now and then.

What is so wrong with loving them and taking in interest in educating myself on nutrition, grooming, training, behavior? Why does that threaten people? Why can't my dogs be my family and my hobby?

Sometimes family drives me nuts. If you aren't exactly like them you are abnormal and need to change.

OK. Rant over.


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## jane and addison (Nov 1, 2012)

Our kids believe the same thing. To bad just the way it is. Deal with it.


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## Lou's Mom (Apr 8, 2014)

My kids say that too. One even said that I loved the dogs more than them. (Sometimes I do! - the furbabies don't talk back, give me a hard time and are always glad to see me!)


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## pippersmom (May 21, 2012)

I wonder sometimes if people see us as abnormal because even though other people love their dogs dearly, to them they are still "just a dog". To us they are not "just a dog", they are our family. Basically everything I do is somehow all revolved around Pipper, whether it be that when I go out I don't stay too long because I know he's waiting for me to come home, or I plan to go out when I know he will be sleeping, or if I am going out for dinner I won't go until after I have fed him his supper first. There is no way I could go out to eat knowing he's at home waiting and hungry. I don't think that makes me abnormal, I call that considerate and if other people think I'm abnormal (and I'm sure they do), then so be it. This is what makes me happy and I don't care what they think.


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## Malt Shoppe (Jul 20, 2011)

Shelly, I am in total agreement with you. These are the same people who will spend lots of money for season tickets/travel expenses to football, baseball, basketball games, golf but think we are obsessed with our dogs! HA! I think they need to look in the mirror!

Most people do have a love, whether it be concerts, theater, sports, camping. Ours just happens to be our beloved dogs who give us so much love and attention in return.

At least we don't leave our dog in the backyard, starving for family attention. They are the people who also don't understand us. Too bad; we get more out of our pets than alot of pets get out of their owners.


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## MalteseObsessed (Mar 7, 2010)

I get the same shtufff from our family...it hurts...but I am not gonna stop lovin on my furry family members that give me such JOY every day...love these little loving creatures....


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

I am really lucky when it comes to my family, they adore Boycie just as much as me. When I visit my parents, Boycie sleeps with them!  He adores my boyfriend and other family members. The people who trouble me are some friends and facebook/personal acquaintances who think I am a ´crazy dog lady´ because of the attention I give to my dog. What they don´t know is how he made my life worth living again after several battles with mayor depression, but I guess that would be funny to them as well. 

People can be really hard on other people for no reason, or maybe they just miss something in their lives.


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## kilodzul (Oct 7, 2013)

I've read this today and I think it summarize well why I think it's our obligation to care and love our dogs as much as it's humanly possible:








We'll never understand how it feels to follow one person around all day and still have your heart broken every time they leave you for 5 minutes. If someone dismiss this kind of love as "just dog", they don't really deserve it.


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

I don't think they feel threatened. It's just that they have their opinion and feel like you need to hear it, but you don't have to defend yourself. I don't know what is a good thing to say in return, not as a comeback really but more of a question about why someone had to comment on what you do. 

But you could say 'thank you, I'll take that as a compliment". followed up with 'that's what you meant isn't it?"

and basically it's a " I have my thing and you have yours". for whatever interests she or someone else has.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

I know that most of my non-dog friends and my co-workers think that I'm CRAZY because I'm so obsessed with my fluffs. And you know what? I DON'T CARE!!!

I love my fluffs. I love being obsessed with my fluffs. It makes me happy and it makes them happy. So what? I'm not asking the rest of the world to be like me, but I'm happy being fluff obsessed.

And guess what? I have a lot of dog friends that are exactly the same way and I love each and every one of them!!!


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## Snowball Pie's Mommi (Oct 16, 2008)

Fee said:


> I am really lucky when it comes to my family, they adore Boycie just as much as me. When I visit my parents, Boycie sleeps with them!  He adores my boyfriend and other family members. The people who trouble me are some friends and facebook/personal acquaintances who think I am a ´crazy dog lady´ because of the attention I give to my dog. What they don´t know is how he made my life worth living again after several battles with mayor depression, but I guess that would be funny to them as well.
> 
> People can be really hard on other people for no reason, or maybe they just miss something in their lives.


Shelly, thank you for starting this thread. You are not alone.

Arnela, you are so blessed. That is so sweet that Boycle sleeps with your parents when you visit them.

I am a believer that how we treat dogs is how we will treat humans. 

There is one family member who says ... "He is just a DOG!!!". She also put down so many of my FB friends because they have fluffs ... as though implying that are below her standards, too. If only she knew the wonderful friends behind those pictures and names. Friends who come from all walks of life ... men and women who are doctors, nurses, lawyers, veterinarians, stay at home moms, secretaries, retirees, like me and my husband ... you name it, the list goes on. The fact is that this family member has her own issues and insecurities that she has not dealt with ... so, thus it is easier for her to try and find fault in everyone else. 

I have another family member who thought I should share an inheritance with her. She couldn't understand why I had chosen to help those less fortunate and do things like pay for our granddaughter's college education. This is a family member who, with her husband, has TWO beautiful homes, they have travelled the world over, and she goes on cruises at least twice a year. Anyway, she had written me a letter telling me that I no longer needed to send her gifts and flowers (along with phone calls, which I always did over the years) and, that, to ... "just take the money and spend it on Snowball". She, too, obviously has issues she hasn't dealt with. She instead finds fault with practically everyone ... just like the other family member. My sweet hubby, who really surprised me ... sent her back the letters she wrote to me with an attached note that asked her to stop sending "poison pen" letters to me. Sadly, it is her loss ... because I always sent her the most thoughtful gifts, handwritten notes, and flowers. But, it was never enough.

And, then there is one of the guys who golfs with my husband ... who showed me his true side. Snowball was not feeling well, and it happened to be on a golf day (which is five days a week for DH) that Felix gave up ... so that we could both take Snowball to the vet. This guy said ... "It's time to get rid of the dog!". Needless to say, I was so PO'd. Here's the same guy who plays golf every day and who seldom visits his wife of many years ... who is now in a nursing home, suffering from Alzheimer's. 

So, with just sharing these examples ... I hope it helps everyone to see that you are not alone in hearing negative remarks about how much we care for and love our precious fluff babies. Even, Snowball's godmother, who is a vet, said Snowball has the soul of an angel. And, she is right. I believe that all of our fluff babies are earth angels. And, I am at the age of who cares if others don't get it ... because it's their loss ... and our blessings ... to have our beloved fluffs who gift us with so much joy and unconditional love.


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## Furbabies mom (Jul 25, 2011)

My family doesn't say anything about my dog obsession but........ I'm sure that they think it!!


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## Snowball Pie's Mommi (Oct 16, 2008)

Furbabies mom said:


> My family doesn't say anything about my dog obsession but........ I'm sure that they think it!!


:HistericalSmiley:


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## dcm (Aug 31, 2012)

Here's a quote I saw on a groomer's sign in front of their shop....and I think it's quite appropriate:

Dogs are God's apology for relatives! :thmbup:


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## Snowbody (Jan 3, 2009)

Preaching to the choir, here on SM. :innocent::HistericalSmiley::HistericalSmiley: 
For the most part my friends and relatives adore Tyler (of course my son will always be jealous of out little "usurper" as he puts it). Yup, kiddo, go to college and you're replaced. :w00t::smrofl: Hey, he's even come around and I've caught him playing with Tyler. I know that some people on FB have written comments about my dog obsession, but usually in jest, but I don't care. I love whom I love and I'm not hurting anyone so too bad if it doesn't fit with your range of normal. Marie - I so agree that watching people interact with animals is very telling of how they treat humans. 

I do have to admit that I had dogs all my life growing up, but I never felt as involved or head over heals in love with one as I do Tyler. Hmmm, I wasn't on a forum either. Okay, I'll blame all of you on SM. Totally your fault that I'm this way. :blink: :eek2_gelb2:


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

Wow, this is happening to us right now
One of my grandson's is graduating today, we will stop by to see him before his gradation party, my son said he knew we had Matilda, so he thought it would work out better for us and for him.
Finally they are getting it, it has taken years for them to understand, I respect others if they aren't dog friendly, so I expect them to realize Matilda is our fur daughter. I love her and if they love me they will have to except that's the way it is.


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## shellbeme (Mar 1, 2011)

Thanks everyone, I was just sort of blind sided. My mom-though she feeds crap food and has some backwards ideas about dog behavior-utterly adores her dogs. I kind of thought we were on the same level so when she said that I was stunned. Then I got angry.

My family is usually great about the boys-they tease me a bit but it's always been good natured. When I talked to my sister about it, she says "We all have our passions, yours is your dogs." And though she teases me a bit now and then she has never put me down or questioned me about why or how I do things for the dogs. Though she doesn't share it-she gets it.


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## maddysmom (Mar 8, 2012)

Everyone I know thinks I'm the crazy dog lady, however, those same people that made sly remarks about my obsession with how I take care of Lacie are now telling me that when they die...they want to come back in time as my fluff and live the life of royalty :yes:


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

My family says the same thing... Al's folks still think we're nuts over dogs.. But when we had Amy , our little black cocker spaniel, they vowed now dogs sleeping in the bed... we were gone a week, came back, she charmed her way into sleeping with them the second night and and a squeaky named George...

We told them "welcome to the dark side"...


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

Shelly, sometimes, maybe all times....it might just be good to say exactly how it made you feel. 

Mom wow that really surprises me I thought we felt the same way about our dogs. Sometimes just starting with that opens up a meaningful chat.


I feel bad for my niece who loves her cat (she's 19 and the cat about 10) , my brother and his wife tolerate him but know she loves him and do what they need to do to keep him safe etc. but he's not loved by them. And I'm sure she's heard so many negative comments and put downs about him all his life,
they 'd do anything for her and she wanted a cat so much, it's too bad she just couldn't have him and enjoy him without all the negativity.


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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

I totally understand ! Though some of my faily and most of my friends totally 'get-it" when it comes to me and my 'babies".... there are many that think I'm totally 'over the top". However I don't care one iota! LOL


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## silverhaven (Sep 6, 2009)

It is annoying particularly with family. I must admit I have probably rolled my eyes at people fawning over pets before. When I was a child I had an Aunt and Uncle with two yorkies who totally babytalked to them constantly. It seemed over the top. But now I am that person LOL.


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## SammieMom (Nov 13, 2010)

I had this issue too when I got Sammie with a brother. Now he knows I ignore him. lol. 

This kinda stuff never ends Shelly, at work, friends and family. People are complicated. Older I got the less I care what people think. They prob got their own issues they worry about. Your a beautiful, caring woman :wub::wub: and that is why this hurts you. I think a lot times the other person has forgotten or never even realized how we perceived it, while we stew over it for days..try and not let what people think define your day. They really do go by so fast.


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## The A Team (Dec 1, 2005)

Well I've been told MANY MANY times by people (friends and family) that when they die, they want to come back as my dogs. :blush::innocent:

I take that as a compliment!!! :thumbsup:


Also, when I run into people I know from the neighborhood, the first thing they ask is "how are the dogs?" :wub:

....oh and I've run into neighborhood friends in Cosco, who....knew they knew me, but didn't recognize me without a dog. 

There are people, of course, who don't like dogs. And I see them on occasion, but usually talk about the dogs just to irritate them....:innocent::innocent:


My daughter loves the kids, but is a bit jealous that I have pictures of the dogs all over the house, and maybe one of her somewhere...:blink: whoops...


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## michellerobison (Dec 17, 2009)

The A Team said:


> Well I've been told MANY MANY times by people (friends and family) that when they die, they want to come back as my dogs. :blush::innocent:
> 
> I take that as a compliment!!! :thumbsup:
> 
> ...


I saw the same thing,I want to come back as one of our dogs if I die,Al totally spoils them..

Just tell them "there are worse things to be accused of " ...


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## Maglily (Feb 3, 2009)

My friend's husband was walking his dog Benny in the park the other day and a woman stopped to admire Benny....she asked " Is that Benny? I haven't seen him for 2 years! " 

His 'mother' and I used to walk the dogs in the park a few times and ran into that woman who had her own dogs.


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## IzzysBellasMom (Jan 16, 2013)

dcm said:


> Here's a quote I saw on a groomer's sign in front of their shop....and I think it's quite appropriate:
> 
> Dogs are God's apology for relatives! :thmbup:


I LOVE this!!!


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## justagirltv (Jun 3, 2014)

I'm going through this now. I've only had Bentley for 2 months but every decision I make effects him. I tend to over read and research everything and I think I should be educated on the decisions I make for him. 

I'm single and in my early 30's and I've had friends say to my face, that I'll never find anyone because I'm so in love and obsessed with Bentley. I'm not looking for anyone right now!!!! Just because someone is single is doesn't mean they are looking! Sue me because I choose to focus on loving myself an my furbaby! 

My parents accepted that he might be their only Grandchild. They love him because I do. They haven't met him yet! 

Luckily my best friend is obsessed with her Toy Poodle, Molly so I tend to spend my free time with her Molly, and Bentley.


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## yukki (Aug 22, 2007)

lol My youngest child said that I loved my Malt more than I loved her!!!!


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## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

justagirltv said:


> I'm going through this now. I've only had Bentley for 2 months but every decision I make effects him. I tend to over read and research everything and I think I should be educated on the decisions I make for him.
> 
> I'm single and in my early 30's and I've had friends say to my face, that I'll never find anyone because I'm so in love and obsessed with Bentley. I'm not looking for anyone right now!!!! Just because someone is single is doesn't mean they are looking! Sue me because I choose to focus on loving myself an my furbaby!
> 
> ...



I am not single, but no plans on having children, I think our pets are part of the family and need care and attention as well as kids. That is why I am perplexed at the thought of people without pets judging those who have them. I think it would be cruel to get a dog, especially a small dog that needs lots of care, grooming, etc...and then neglect him. That is just awful. I think it is fabulous that you love and care for your little Bentley so much. And oh, he is so cute and sweet! I love the name! Do not worry about others, as long as you´re happy, and little Bentley is happy, that is all that matters :thumbsup::wub:


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## BJR (Mar 19, 2014)

I, too, made the choice many years ago not to have children and be a fluff mom. Being an only child, it was difficult for my parents to understand. Of course they were disappointed not to have grandchildren, especially when all of their friends were passing around baby pics. Strangely, my ex-husband wanted to "re-connect" (after I was remarried). He asked if I had any children (one of the reasons we split), and when I told him I was a very fulfilled mom to my Maltese girls, his comment was..."yeah, you always loved your dogs best" My current husband of 27 years LOVES our girls as much as I do. We are a very small family, and we like it that way. Like others have said, confidence to not care what others think takes time. I am not totally there, but am getting better.


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## justagirltv (Jun 3, 2014)

Fee said:


> I am not single, but no plans on having children, I think our pets are part of the family and need care and attention as well as kids. That is why I am perplexed at the thought of people without pets judging those who have them. I think it would be cruel to get a dog, especially a small dog that needs lots of care, grooming, etc...and then neglect him. That is just awful. I think it is fabulous that you love and care for your little Bentley so much. And oh, he is so cute and sweet! I love the name! Do not worry about others, as long as you´re happy, and little Bentley is happy, that is all that matters :thumbsup::wub:


Life doesn't always go as planned. I thought I would get married, get a puppy, have a baby. I ended up getting the fluff first! :aktion033: He's my family (I'm an only child and my parents live 900 miles away). I'm hoping that my family will grow but for now were happy and he's my priority.
I celebrate and make note of his milestones just like I would for a human baby. He lost another tooth last night 

I still go out and have a "life", I never really was a party girl I'm kinda a low key homebody. Now when I choose to go out I make sure all of Bentley's needs are met. If I have to stop home first. I don't mind, if I have to end the night early, I don't mind. 

I think there's dog people and fur baby people. Were fur baby people. :thumbsup:

All our fluffs have is us (unless they have siblings). They can't text a friend when they are bored or go online or read a book when were not home.


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## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

Well said! I actually only go out when I am visiting my parents and somebody can stay with Boycie. I take him shopping, to work, to Uni, he goes everywhere with me. If I do have to leave him for a while (2 hours tops), I cannot concentrate on anything because I am thinking of him and know he is lonely. Call me a crazy dog lady, but he is my baby  My whole life revolves around him.


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## lydiatug (Feb 21, 2012)

Yep, guilty as charged! Hubby always says if we were in a sinking boat, I would save the puppies first! 

I mostly get teased good naturedly, but there are those that really do think I'm the crazy dog lady. On the other hand, my friend trusts me to watch her mama weenie and her 4 5wk old puppies for the next 4 days, so I guess I can't be all bad!


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## CorkieYorkie (Apr 10, 2012)

Ha, I think you are among friends here... ;-)

I displayed my dog-craziness at my wedding last month:










My parents think I am nuts, but I don't care! I also insisted that they slept with me the night before my wedding and were there the morning of in their little wedding accessories (pictures later!). 

The only reason they didn't walk down the aisle is their severe anxiety (they are rescues and very shy and scared around strangers)...! 

They are our babies. And when we have skin-babies, they will STILL be our babies! We will just have a slightly bigger family ;-)


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## Fee (Oct 26, 2013)

Congratulations on your nuptials! Wow, that is one AMAZING cake and I love the little pups on top! I don't think it is too much


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## lydiatug (Feb 21, 2012)

Courtney, I just LOVE the cake! It turned out absolutely fabulous!!!


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## cush123 (Nov 26, 2013)

I didn't get it either until I got my first dog a Bichon. I could not understand how anyone let a dog get in their bed or lick them in the face. But oh how I do now, so much that I also got a sweet maltese..... I think even people with pets love them differently and in different ways, but there is nothing wrong with your fur baby being your pride and joy and treating your fur baby special. Most of the time I would rather be with my two fur babies than my human friends.


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