# Should I Place Lacie?



## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

As all of you that have been following the issues with my poor little Lacie know, she is having a true emotional breakdown about Jerry not being home and her entire life changing.

I love her dearly and would do anything humanly possible to help her, but she just seems so very unhappy 90% of the time. 

Even doing things that she enjoys seem to upset her. For example, she loves to go in the car, and yesterday evening I had a quick errand to run near the house and so I decided to take the girls along for a ride. The weather was cool and so it was a wonderful time to go out. Lacie was very excited to get to go, but once we were about 4 blocks from the house, she just started trembling and trembling and was in somewhat of a panic mode. I have no idea why.

Jerry and I have talked and talked about Lacie and what she's going through and he has suggested that I try to place her with a retiree that is home most of the time so that Lacie will be able to have someone with her all the time.

She is my baby, but if this is what it will take to make her happy again, I'm willing to give her up. Whatever would be best for her. It's just so obvious that she's miserable right now. I'm not certain that finding her a new home would help, but I would do it if she would be happy again.

What do you think about this idea?


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## allheart (Oct 3, 2008)

Oh Lynn, I am so very sorry. Everything medically has checked out with her? My heart is breaking for you both.

Lynn, if everything is checking out with her medicially, my girlfriend is a vet tech, and sometimes, they prescribe a very very very mild xanax for short term use.

Perhaps try something along those lines if all medicial issues have been reviewed and observe her behavoir and well being then.

I just am heartbroken for you both...but I really feel there is still hope....


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## The A Team (Dec 1, 2005)

OH! :new_shocked: ....Too emotional for me to even go there right this minute (I'm at work). You are having to go through some HUGE problems lately, Lynn, and all I can do is hope and pray things straighten out for you, girlfriend. 

Do you have someone in mind? Someone nearby? If so, maybe a trial period......


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## Ladysmom (Oct 19, 2004)

Are you sure there isn't something physical causing all this? Lacie is very sensitive like my Lady and I know if anything is "off" with Lady physically, I can tell by the way she behaves.

If this truly is emotional due to all the upheaval in her life recently with Jerry's illness, I honestly don't think turning her whole world upside down by rehoming her will help. I would think it would make things much, much worse if her one security, her mommy, was gone.


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## LJSquishy (Feb 27, 2008)

I am so sorry you are having to even entertain the idea of rehoming Lacie. :bysmilie: I know she must be having an incredibly hard time for you to even consider it. Poor Lacie has really had her world turned upside down with Jerry away, and with being able to sense the stress that you have all of the time.

I know only you and Jerry can make the decision, but I don't know if placing her in a new home would help her. She would be in an entirely new environment, without her sister. I don't know if she would understand what happened. There has to be another answer to this -- maybe a prescription, like Christine mentioned. I just cannot imagine what you are going through right now, and my thoughts are with you, Lynn. :grouphug:


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

I'm pretty positive that it isn't something medical as she had her dental about 6 weeks ago and had a full blood panel and urine panel done at that time plus her regular annual checkup. She isn't really exhibiting any symptoms that she is ill, but emotionally upset. 

And, yes, she's very, very, very sensitive. She may be more upset than she was because of the thunderstorms as she always is upset during monsoon season. 

I'm hoping that it will pass because by next week, we're not supposed to get more rain for a while.

It was a suggestion from Jerry, but, I'm sure that you all know that my heart isn't into giving up my baby girl -- Princess. And, no, I don't have anyone in mind as Jerry just brought this up last night. I just want to be certain that I'm not being selffish and that I'm thinking of the best for her. :smcry: It just breaks my heart to see my little baby so sad.


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## theboyz (Jan 10, 2007)

Oh Lynn, I am guessing it is the weather also. Jack hates change in the weather and if a storm is near he is in his "Don Knotts" mood. Shakes, paces, pants etc.

She needs you and her home and routine not a new family. Is there someone that would visit while you are gone. I often go to my friend Jennifers house while she is out working. I will play with the dogs for a while and just make sure all is well.


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## maggieh (Dec 16, 2007)

QUOTE (Lacie's Mom @ May 27 2009, 11:18 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=781695


> . I just want to be certain that I'm not being selffish and that I'm thinking of the best for her. :smcry: It just breaks my heart to see my little baby so sad.[/B]


I don't think you're being selfish - you care waaayyy too much about her to ever be selfish. I agree with some of the other posts that rehoming could make things worse. Right now she has you and her sister as her "anchors" and that's her stability. I'd explore an anti-anxiety type medication with the vet and maybe some in home doggy play time for special attention but I think completely uprooting her would make things worse. 

Go give both of those sweet little girls big hugs and puppy kisses from all of us! We're hoping and praying that things will get better for ALL of you very soon!

Maggie, Sweetness and Tessa :grouphug:


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## mom2bijou (Oct 19, 2006)

You are going thru so many changes right now with Jerry and it certainly has affected the girls, but personally I really don't think Lacie would be happier in a new home. She would be without her sister and without you. Although she may have someone with her all the time, I think she would suffer more if she were to leave her family. I know you want Lacie to be happy just as our pups want us to be happy....but maybe it's better for you and Lacie to be each other's comforts. You would be lost without her Lynn, and I think she would be lost without you and your family. 

I hope things turn around for all of you soon. Stay strong and positive. Sending lots of hugs to all of you! :grouphug:


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## Ladysmom (Oct 19, 2004)

The changes in the barometric pressure during thunderstorm season is very unsettling to dogs. It can trigger seizures in dogs with low seizure thresholds like Lady. I wouldn't be surprised if that was causing a lot of Lacie's anxiety.

http://www.petplace.com/dogs/how-do-dogs-s...orms/page1.aspx


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## bbry (Feb 17, 2007)

QUOTE (LadysMom @ May 27 2009, 11:32 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=781706


> The changes in the barometric pressure during thunderstorm season is very unsettling to dogs. It can trigger seizures in dogs with low seizure thresholds like Lady. I wouldn't be surprised if that was causing a lot of Lacie's anxiety.
> 
> http://www.petplace.com/dogs/how-do-dogs-s...orms/page1.aspx[/B]



That was very interesting. I have noticed that in my Yorkie. Long before I know there's a change, she begins to tremble. It is getting dark & threatening thunderstorms right now & she is at the groomers. I feel bad that she is having to go through both stresses without me.

Lynn, I don't think the stress of a rehoming would be good for Lacie now. Do you know when she might be able to be with Jerry during the day?


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## thinkpink (Sep 25, 2004)

Everything you're going through now is just temporary. Believe me I know it feels like it will be this way forever but it won't. I'd hate for everything to calm down and you not have your Lacie with you. There has to be other options to consider before taking such a big step. Maybe your vet could give her something mild to help her nerves or even some of the natural things that are out there may help. Bella went through a spell where she'd get sick everytime I got really upset. Today she's as happy as can be and driving my crazy begging for my lunch. :biggrin: Hang in there, Lacie will get back to her old self.


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## luvmyfurbaby (Feb 11, 2007)

Lynn I'd check with the vet about a sedative. I was totally against giving Mia anything but we are in rainy season here in FL. Mia has been really nervous this morning because she sensed the rain was coming. As soon as I saw her like that I sprayed the Chill Out around her and gave her a tiny bit of the liquid Xanax that the Vet prescribed. It started raining and she started shaking. As soon as the meds. hit she is just laying there no trembling or spazing out. You may want to ask your Vet.


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## mysugarbears (Aug 13, 2007)

Lynn, i'm so sorry that Lacie seems to be getting worse, i don't think rehoming her will help i think it will hurt her more. She'll wonder why mommy and daddy don't love her anymore, she won't understand that you did it because you love her so much and she'll probably wonder what she did to cause her mommy and daddy to give her up. I know how hard it is to watch your little girl going through this and you want to do what's best for her, but i don't think rehoming her is going to be the answer. Can you look into getting someone to come and stay with the girls during the day while your working, not someone that comes and goes, but someone to stay with them all day? Maybe that will help Lacie to have someone with her all day. :grouphug: :grouphug:


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## Hunter's Mom (Dec 8, 2008)

I don't have anything to add because I think you have gotten so much good advice and since rain doesn't bother Hunter (knock on wood) I can't really help but I can tell you that I am hoping that a prescription and no more rain helps to heal her little heart and soul. 

xoxo


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## mpappie (Jun 28, 2005)

no, i think she needs her mommy, if she is upset about Jerry what would she think if you both weren't there for her. she would feel so abandoned. sometimes rehoming is necessary, i don't believe that is the case here.
I believe you are very upset about Jerry (rightly so) as well as Lacie, she is picking up on your feelings and energy. 
Just hang in there. 

:grouphug: rayer:


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## LUCY N PETS (Apr 21, 2009)

I agree with the others giving up Lacie is not the answer. No I don't have the right answer but I do have a little advice.
You probably know now that I lost my husband almost 1 1/2 years ago now, and it was an emotional roll. I was staying at Hospice most of the time with him and my poor little babies at home didn't understand.
We went through this for almost 3 months. I was a mess, my husband was dying, my babies at home needed
me and I need them. Anyways after my husband passed away, if I didn't have my furbabies to hold and comfort me when I needed them most I don't know if I could have made it through each day.
They needed me as well because they felt abandoned at home alone most of the time. But time does heal, your furbabies do forgive you and they are there for you if and when you need them, no questions asked.
I also thought I should give them up, but instead had my son go feed and water and let them out to play, but I am So, So, So glad I didn't.
Now we are expecting "Savannah" life does go on and it is hard sometimes, but the rewards of having your furbabies more than make up for it. They always somehow bring a smile to your face.

Lucy


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## Furbaby's Mommie (Jul 10, 2004)

I didn't read every comment so I may be repeating something-- I think if Lacie is upset emotionally for some reason, putting her in a strange place would be awful for her. Think if you were fearful and full of anxiety and the only people you know sent you off to a foreign land with strangers and you didn't know why. You would be more frightened and feel abandoned.

I realize I'm looking at it as if she was human, but that's the only way I can. I also think our babies think more like humans than most animals too.


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## godiva goddess (Nov 19, 2007)

QUOTE (mom2Bijou @ May 27 2009, 12:28 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=781703


> You are going thru so many changes right now with Jerry and it certainly has affected the girls, but personally I really don't think Lacie would be happier in a new home. She would be without her sister and without you. Although she may have someone with her all the time, I think she would suffer more if she were to leave her family. I know you want Lacie to be happy just as our pups want us to be happy....but maybe it's better for you and Lacie to be each other's comforts. You would be lost without her Lynn, and I think she would be lost without you and your family.
> 
> I hope things turn around for all of you soon. Stay strong and positive. Sending lots of hugs to all of you! :grouphug:[/B]


i totally agree!! im so sorry Lynn..i will be praying for you and Lacie and Jerry!!


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## I found nemo (Feb 23, 2006)

I have no advice.
I just wanted you to know your in my thoughts and I hope the best outcome for all.. :grouphug:


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

I only have a minute and haven't read everything here but ....

If you love her and she loves you .... then ... NO!!


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## princessre (Dec 23, 2008)

I can tell how much you love Lacie. I'm sorry-- the fact that you are even entertaining the idea of placing her says to me that you are being too tough on yourself. You must be blaming yourself for not being a good enough Mommy to even think about giving her up. It is natural for her to be upset because you're upset. She loves YOU, not someone random who is not upset. Our Malts are so loyal and they like their tribe. I wouldn't re-home any pet unless I was not capable of taking care of them any more. Though we all have our ups and downs as parents, we know ourselves and we are much more reliable than the average person who may appear loving, but may be fickle and send the dog to a shelter if they should change their mind or lose their job or move, etc. Lacie is exactly where she should be! Don't be too tough on yourself! Things will turn around.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Thanks for all the comments and reassurance that Lacie needs to be with her Mom (ME). I would never, ever have thought of placing her, but Jerry suggested it and I gave it some thought -- wondering if she would be happier with someone that was around all the time. But even when we're home together on the weekends, she doesn't seem happy. I'm just so worried about her. Hopefully we soon won't have thunderstorms daily and maybe she will be better.

I love her so very much and just want what's best for her. I know that Tilly would be LOST without Lacie, so that too, would be another consideration as it might end up doing damage to both of them instead of helping.

So, I'll just keep trying and trying to find ways to comfort my baby girl and hope that she cheers up very, very soon.

I am going to call Dr. Patricia about getting her some doggie Xanax to try to help.


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## lovesophie (Jan 28, 2008)

I'm sorry, Lynn, as I don't have any advice to offer, but I agree with the others that re-homing Lacie is not the solution. I know you're going through a lot right now, but please try to work things out with her. :grouphug: 

I'll be thinking of you, Jerry, and your girls. :grouphug:


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## Maidto2Maltese (Oct 19, 2004)

I , too, am one who thinks it would not be in Lacie's best interest to re-home and might even be even more traumatizing to her. Checking with the vet for something to 'take the edge off' her anxiety seems a good option in my opinion.

I'd even take her in and have the vet check her mouth ( to be sure no residual 'something' bothering her since her dentistry) . 

Also even if she did have blood work up ore dentistry... was a thyroid 6-panel done? Have heard "off" thyroid can create anxiety in some pooches....just a thought.


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## lillykins (Oct 15, 2007)

My heart breaks every time I think of you, Jerry, and your shared concerns. Perhaps Lacie has picked up on this, too? I agree with everyone who has posted about contacting your (trusted) vet. Let him/her know what's going on with Lacie and see if there are any easy suggestions: perhaps Rescue Remedy? It is my understanding that this product works best when administered regularly.

My best to you as you navigate this journey. . .


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## ckim111 (Dec 17, 2008)

I can speak from first hand experience. When something really small bothers our dogs physically, they can act depressed. For example, Bella kept trying to lick at her stomach. We put a bandaid on the area for her to stop. She acted extremely depressed and looked as though she was emotionally upset. Also this behavior was not constant either. It was very random...

I'm not saying that Lacie necessarily has anything wrong with her physically. I do however think you should get a second opinion from a different vet. I think once you can rule out any physical ailments with 100% certainty then you can consider some other options for her. But I also tend to agree with others that if she really is acting this way due to not having 1 family member around, imagine what would happen to her if she was to lose her whole family. 

Whatever the case, I will be keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers... Hang in there


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## gatiger40 (Jun 7, 2007)

Lynn,

I don't have too much to add as the other posts have said it all, I just wanted you to know you are a wonderful mommy and Lacie needs YOU now more than ever.

The idea of a sedative or an anti depressant is an excellent one. She may be experiencing a chemical imbalance and this would help even her out. I know if I don't take my Zoloft (an anti-depressant) I start to feel on edge. I would at least try her on something your vet suggests short term and see if it helps. It certainly can't hurt to try.


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## Harley & Dakotas Mum (Jun 11, 2005)

Lynn I am sorry you and Lacie are going through this. I know what its like to have an anxious pup, and it's heartbreaking when you can't seem to do anything to get them to relax & feel calm.

Have you thought about trying a Dog Appeasing Pheromone (DAP) diffuser? Info on DAP Diffuser Maybe when you speak to your vet you could ask their opinion on using it?


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## joyomom (Jan 13, 2008)

Hugs to you!!!!! :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:


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## bonniesmom (Jun 2, 2008)

QUOTE (Lacie's Mom @ May 27 2009, 03:26 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=781821


> Thanks for all the comments and reassurance that Lacie needs to be with her Mom (ME). I would never, ever have thought of placing her, but Jerry suggested it and I gave it some thought -- wondering if she would be happier with someone that was around all the time. But even when we're home together on the weekends, she doesn't seem happy. I'm just so worried about her. Hopefully we soon won't have thunderstorms daily and maybe she will be better.
> 
> I love her so very much and just want what's best for her. I know that Tilly would be LOST without Lacie, so that too, would be another consideration as it might end up doing damage to both of them instead of helping.
> 
> ...



I think that's the right approach, Lynn - it's probably best for all concerned (human and fluffs) to all stay together. At least give the Xanax a try and wait
for the thunderstorm season to be over and see how she does. I'm sure she's picking up on your anxieties and general stress, which of course are 
somewhat out of your control. Hang in there with your babies and know that we're all thinking of you and hoping for the best for all. :grouphug: :grouphug:


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## CeeCee's Mom (Sep 14, 2006)

Sometimes we just need to put pen to paper so to speak (fingers to keyboard) and in this way, we can work out our problem!!!! So glad you have figured out what to do!!! Good luck to you..................


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## CrystalAndZoe (Jul 11, 2006)

I'm just so sorry you even had to consider this. But it just shows how much you love her and want what's best for her. No matter how hard it would be for you. I agree with everyone else that rehoming her would just further upset her and turn the last little bit of her known world upside down. Hang in there and give it some more time. I really think she is picking up on all the emotions you are going through right now.

Just a thought. Is it Lacie or Tilly that is so fond of your other dog? Is he/she (sorry can't remember) home with you now or still at your friends? I'm wondering if bringing him/her home would help?


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## PreciousPrince (Feb 27, 2006)

Oh Lynn I'm so sorry that you have this situation with Lacie to deal with on top of what's going on with your husband. It must be very hard to watch your baby become so sad. I'm glad that it seems you're no longer considering re-homing her - if she's so sensitive that she's reacted this way to losing her daddy and having her routine changed (when you go to visit him for example), imagine what it would do to her if she was placed in a new environment with complete (even if loving and doting) strangers. Things change, even for our babies, and right now she just needs help dealing with that change; and she needs you as that's all she has right now.
I think it was awesome that you contacted Sonia to have her try to explain things to her. Even if Lacie is still confused about what's going on, or just does not want to accept it, at least you know she didn't like the daycare, and she's not having that stress added to her life. How is she doing when your neighbor comes over with her dog? Does the neighbor say she perks up a bit and plays? 
I do agree she needs something to help her, and if it were me I'd try natural therapies before pharmaceuticals. There are side effects with those, and dogs can't tell you how it's making them feel so you can adjust dosages, ect. I know they have their place but like I said, would want to try other things first. My parent's dog developed isolation distress, I won't go into details but I consulted with a homeopath and the remedies are really helping him. I don't know if homeopathy works well for grieving/confusion/sadness ect but it's worth checking into. If you are interested and can't find a homeopathic vet near you the one I work with used to live here but moved, so I did Andre's consult on the phone, and I could give you her info. She seems to know her stuff, and studied under Dr. Pitcairn.
Flower Essences might even be a better option since her problems are so emotionally based - there are lots of pet essence companies out there, but here's one I had bookmarked because it was developed by a vet and a behaviorist. SpiritEssence You could call and see if they have something or a combo of things that could help with Lacie. 
Another thing to look into would be some reiki sessions for her. I'm sure most of the human reiki practitioners would be glad to do some mini sessions with her. Maybe she needs some energy balancing and that could help. Now Perri's gotten the last part of my reiki sessions since he was a pup and he has his issues so I'm not saying that it would be some magic treatment, but might help a bit in conjuction with other things, and just be worth trying out. Oh and I like Jacqui's suggestion of a dap room diffuser for your home too. Ok I'm done sounding like a total hippie, just trying to give some other options. 
Again, I'm so sorry you guys are going through this, please know we're here for you. :grouphug:


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## lillykins (Oct 15, 2007)

QUOTE (PreciousPrince @ May 27 2009, 09:14 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=782045


> Ok I'm done sounding like a total hippie, just trying to give some other options.[/B]


I think you sound like a very caring person.
I can't speak for Lacie's mom, but I appreciate this info.
:grouphug:


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## dwerten (Oct 6, 2007)

Have you tried the rescue remedy for pets with no alcohol in it -just a thought -- i am so sorry for all you are going through


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:


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## aggiemom99 (Dec 3, 2007)

I can't think of anything to add. Please know you, Lacie, Jerry and Tillie are in my thoughts.


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## Lacie's Mom (Oct 11, 2006)

Thanks to all for the great suggestions. :ThankYou: 

I have tried the diffuser (at my vet's suggestion) for the thunderstorms and it did not seem to help at all. I do have a really good homeopathic vet near me that I may contact and the reiki is also a great idea. I've had friends that have used acupunture on their furbutts, but only to help with pain issues. (Ashley, I certainly don't think that you're a hippie. I live very close to Santa Fe which is full of New Age believers -- so I do have a lot of resources available. :biggrin: )

Our thunderstorm yesterday was mild and happened a little earlier in the afternoon, so I'm not certain how Lacie did. :Bad day: She seemed very happy when I got home and I did give her a little dose of rescue remedy with her dinner. I don't know if it had to do with that or not, but she seemed a little happier last evening. :thmbup: She came and asked for snuggles (which I am more than happy to provide) :hugging: and sat with me while I was reading and didn't go into her Pampered Pink Princess House to be alone. And then she and Tilly romped and played and seemed to have a good time and she wanted to sleep on the bed in her normal place. Lately she's been spending about 1/2 of the night in her House. And this morning when we got up, she was very happy and got up and started to romp and play. But after her cookie (which is the last thing I do before I leave for work) she looked at me again and put her tail down and was sad. :smcry: 

When Kathleen comes over in the daytime, Lacie is always glad to see her and I know that Lacie enjoys the company. 

BTW, it is Tilly (not Lacie) that is best buds with Nellie (our Black Lab), and I couldn't pry Nellie away from Jerry if I tried.

I'm more hopeful today that it is just the thunderstorms that have caused Lacie extra stress and that she will be better after they are over. She had seemed to be making progress until the thunderstorms started. 

After our snuggle time last night, I knew that I couldn't give her up. She's my baby girl and is probably much happier where she is than she would be elsewhere. I just have to keep working on getting her past this emotional crisis.


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## I found nemo (Feb 23, 2006)

QUOTE (Lacie's Mom @ May 28 2009, 02:21 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=782290


> Thanks to all for the great suggestions. :ThankYou:
> 
> I have tried the diffuser (at my vet's suggestion) for the thunderstorms and it did not seem to help at all. I do have a really good homeopathic vet near me that I may contact and the reiki is also a great idea. I've had friends that have used acupunture on their furbutts, but only to help with pain issues. (Ashley, I certainly don't think that you're a hippie. I live very close to Santa Fe which is full of New Age believers -- so I do have a lot of resources available. :biggrin: )
> 
> ...


Lots of love and all the best for you and Jerry and your family :grouphug: :grouphug:


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