# kids need to learn respect!



## triste (Aug 30, 2004)

I just took oliver for a quick walk before the storm hits and what do I see? Two boys that are about 10 rummaging thru my 95 yr old neighbor's flower bed!!!! I asked them what they were doing. I look over and I see they have ridden their bikes thru her yard! They respond to my question... " nothing." I ask what they were looking for ...again... "nothing." I then say " this is a very nice old lady's flower bed and you have no business walking on her flowers!" I was half expecting them to say they lost their cat, ball, etc but they responded they were doing "nothing." I told them to move along and that they were ruining a 95 yr old lady's flowers! Really ...I swear I would be embarassed if my kids treated someone else's property like they were treating her flowers!


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## dogloverx3 (Apr 14, 2006)

That's why I have a sprinkler system  - stand on my flowers and feel my WRATH  Sarah


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## crow (Jul 20, 2008)

I know what you mean. We have a huge Cuban Laurel tree in our front yard and when we were going to pick up Delilah yesterday, there were 4 boys in our yard, under the tree, with their bikes, playing with sticks and lounging about. I asked them what they were doing and they just looked at me like I was from another planet. Then, my one daughter told them to please leave bc we have big dogs that like to go out on the lead out front, so they watched us leave. They were gone by the time we got back about an hour later. Garbage was left under out tree, though.


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## domino_angel (Apr 17, 2008)

Yeah, No kidding. We just got done with a weekend garage sale. There was a family that came by, and bought a few things. They stayed forever! While they loitered, the little boy and girl wrecked havok. They actually BROKE things, thank god it was nothing expensive! It could have been! I almost told them to take the hellish children and leave. I only didn't because I don't know where they live, and don't want to make enemies of close neighbors. (we are new in the neighborhood) 

I would have been beat til next week had I done that sort of stuff!


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## bonniesmom (Jun 2, 2008)

I couldn't agree more with all of you, and I think it's because there is way too much permissiveness with kids these days. It
wasn't like that in my generation, or even in my daughter's! Parents actually bring infants and young children to nice restaurants
in NY and I've even heard of one time when a mother changed the kid's diaper ON THE TABLE. (The place DID have a ladies'
room!) When they start off being treated like they are the center of the universe, how are they going to become civilized
when they get a little bigger??? :smpullhair: :angry:


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## carrie (Aug 24, 2004)

i think the excessive permissiveness has to do with the legal system these days. parents are afraid to discipline their children for fear of punishment by law.
seriously, you speak to your children in anything but a polite tone, and you can be in for a nice verbal abuse case.


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## wolfieinthehouse (Dec 14, 2007)

I think kids generally aren't taught manners by their families (some are) and that they have always been rascals by nature, free spirits unconcerned with the bigger picture.

I love kids but don't want them uninvited in my yard.

(I have three kids of my own and their friends are welcome here)


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## 5maltsmom (Aug 12, 2007)

On the news the other night they were showing where a lady got caught on an outside store video, grabbing her 4-5 year old son by the ear, and then knocking him in the head with a big shopping bag, and knocking him to the ground. Needless to say they are looking for her. I know it's hard to discipline your children in public anymore, but where is the happy medium?


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## bonniesmom (Jun 2, 2008)

QUOTE (Carrie @ Jul 20 2008, 06:58 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608533


> i think the excessive permissiveness has to do with the legal system these days. parents are afraid to discipline their children for fear of punishment by law.
> seriously, you speak to your children in anything but a polite tone, and you can be in for a nice verbal abuse case.[/B]


Carrie, you have a good point, but I think the training can be accomplished at home, where the law (hopefully) is not
watching or listening. I do know of A FEW well-behaved kids who are that way because their parents teach them from a
very young age in the privacy of their home.


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## bonniesmom (Jun 2, 2008)

QUOTE (5maltsmom @ Jul 20 2008, 07:11 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608542


> On the news the other night they were showing where a lady got caught on an outside store video, grabbing her 4-5 year old son by the ear, and then knocking him in the head with a big shopping bag, and knocking him to the ground. Needless to say they are looking for her. I know it's hard to discipline your children in public anymore, but where is the happy medium?[/B]


Good question! An example of the opposite extreme which makes me wonder how that "lady" was brought up :bysmilie:


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## Toby's Mom (May 7, 2004)

Don't even get me started on this topic! LOL It is a big pet peeve of mine!

Whenever hubby and I go out to eat, we are always amazed at the undisciplined children we see running around restaurants! The best one was a few weeks ago, some kid was rummaging through his mother's purse on the floor. (My mom would have KILLED me if I ever went through her purse!) Anyway, the family left and when we walked by the table that they had been sitting at, there was mascara, a brush, three credit cards, and some blank checks laying on the floor. The kid must have dumped it all out and the mother never saw. We picked it up and brought it to the manager. I hope she got her stuff back.


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## Matilda's mommy (Jun 1, 2005)

It seems kids have no respect now days and they usually learn it from their parents, when I see a family with well behaved children I always make a point to go over and thank them for teaching their children how to be respectful. I had 4 children and fostered two or three with mine, they new to be good and respect others, now they are grown and only one of my kids have respectful children. When I have my other grandkids I have to sit down and explain to them when they are disrespectful, they have gotten away with it and just don't think anything of it. By the time they leave grandma's they know they are not allowed to be that way with me. funny thing is they always beg to come stay with me. A little love goes along way


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## camfan (Oct 30, 2006)

QUOTE (Matilda's Mommy @ Jul 20 2008, 08:26 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608571


> A little love goes along way[/B]


You got it, Paula. Love = discipline in my opinion. And discipline doesn't mean beatings, either. I'm BIG on teaching respect in my house and I can see the difference in my kids vs. a lot of their peers.

Not too long ago the boy (around 10 at the time) directly across the street was playing football on my front lawn (??). Pete didn't understand me getting upset and joked that I would be the nasty old lady who peers out the window ready to pounce on anyone who makes a false move. But that's not it--it's the respect issue. I was really baffled why they were doing this and I eventually went outside and said something like "did you guys need something?" The mother of the boy, when I've had to RESPECTFULLY confront her on a few issues, always looks at me like I'm crazy, never apologizes or offers to fix the problem (that has clearly been hers--like her cat tearing up one of my window screens which I saw with my own eyes). So....as they say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.


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## MissMelanie (Feb 13, 2006)

:smpullhair: OHHHH how I could go on, and on and on in this topic.

When we moved into our house in 1998 our first evening here, with only about 1/10th of our things unpacked, our front door opened and in walked a very small boy, barefoot and without a shirt on. We all just about came unglued. Calm as could be he said to us, "what are you doing here?"

I walked over to him and asked him, "is this your home?" "Nope" was his reply. So then I asked him where he lives and why he walked into a house that isn't his. He told me, he saw our cat in the front window and knew that the people that lived here before didn't like cats, so he wanted to save the cat.

Turned out, he lives nextdoor to us and his parents DRINK and his Mom is wacky as all get out. He was ONLY 4 years old at the time, out barefoot, shirtless and walking into a house that wasn't his at 9:45 PM! Could I have hoped for much from those neighbors? Nope and I never did. 

Many of the children in this neighborhood never thought anything about playing in our huge front yard... and I NEVER understood that at all. Some climb our big trees, oh that was until I started going out and asking them to sign the "release" so they could be in our yard or climb our trees. I also gave them a copy to take home for their parents to sign.  

When I encounter a child misbehaving at work now... I speak to them in a quiet tone and tell them "You are better then your actions, so let your actions show just how good you are." It works 97% of the time. And when I see children that are well behaved, I also always tell the parents, "Job well done."

Parents are not doing their children any favors by letting them run wild or "free". WHAT are these parents going to do when their "free" teenager says to them, "give me your car keys" or "hand me your credit cards" ????? And just what are these parents going to do with these "free" children that just want to loaf about their house all day long and never get a job?

OH, yes, I could go on and on.
Melanie


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## hambys97 (Feb 25, 2005)

Unfortunately, you can't discipline your children at home either. It isn't because some parents don't want to, it is because kids are taught in school that if you are abused you should call and report this. Well, a child's understanding of "abused" is not the same. And you have children who threaten to call CPS (Child Protective Services). They are willing to exaggerate situations (as that is what kids do, not out of malice but it is simply something they do) and then where are you left. Going through a legal battle to prove that you weren't beating your children. 

I have been told more than once by complete strangers that I have the nicest, polite children. I AM proud of that. But, I am also terrified alot of the time because of the way the laws are against parents. If my children are misbehaving in public, I should be able to take care of that in public. But, I can't. And then I have others looking at me thinking I am a horrid parent because I am not doing anything. My hands are tied. It isn't because I don't want to take care of my responsibility, I simply have no means to do it in certain situations. IMO.


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## LitGal (May 15, 2007)

I understand that many parents feel that they're restricted when it comes to disciplining children, but parents don't need to use physical discipline to be effective. I know parents who have never spanked their kids and they are perfectly well behaved - they have lovely manners, follow rules, interact with adults in a mature way, etc. Parenting is a huge commitment, and I don't know if enough people think about the work and effort that is required to raise delightful children. 

I was in a restaurant with a friend of mine and a kid (about 6 or 7 years old) came up and hit my friend on the leg. She looked at me in shock and the kid hit her again. She told the kid that she needed to stop hitting her. The parents overheard this and they said to my friend, "are you telling me how to raise my kid?" Obviously someone needs to help them raise this kid.


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## carrie (Aug 24, 2004)

QUOTE (hambys97 @ Jul 21 2008, 11:40 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608800


> Unfortunately, you can't discipline your children at home either. It isn't because some parents don't want to, it is because kids are taught in school that if you are abused you should call and report this. Well, a child's understanding of "abused" is not the same. And you have children who threaten to call CPS (Child Protective Services). They are willing to exaggerate situations (as that is what kids do, not out of malice but it is simply something they do) and then where are you left. Going through a legal battle to prove that you weren't beating your children.
> 
> I have been told more than once by complete strangers that I have the nicest, polite children. I AM proud of that. But, I am also terrified alot of the time because of the way the laws are against parents. If my children are misbehaving in public, I should be able to take care of that in public. But, I can't. And then I have others looking at me thinking I am a horrid parent because I am not doing anything. My hands are tied. It isn't because I don't want to take care of my responsibility, I simply have no means to do it in certain situations. IMO.[/B]


EXACTLY, i completely agree with you here. i've had a few scares myself....the most recent was when i told my kids they weren't allowed the SNACK i bought them if they didn't straighten up when i picked them up from school. apparently someone felt the need to report me and all of a sudden the police showed up at my house and interviewed myself, my husband and my children! i was going to be brought up on neglect charges for withholding food from my children! WTH?! before that, the girl who used to live in the apartments around the corner was charged with neglect when she let her 6 year old son ride his bike in nothing but his under roos (no shirt, no shoes, no shorts, no helmet) after dark. the police were called and found the boy at the store parking lot at 10:30pm, filthy from head to toe. for some reason she thought i was the one who called (i wasn't even out at that time) so she called the police on me in retaliation. AND TOLD ME ABOUT IT AFTERWARD. said my kids were out doing what her kids were doing, said they were riding their bikes with no helmet and were filthy and unsupervised all the time. problem was, i had friends over that evening, it was 7pm and the police showed up, my kids were playing in the backyard with my friends kids and they were fully dressed, clean and accounted for (supervised). that was stated in the report. but my god, you have to be on the defense these days! i'm scared to death!

EDIT: and i want to say, i have extremely intelligent, well behaved, respectful children...they are complimented all the time. i am proud of my kids and i do everything in my power to make their lives better. that's what i do, i'm a mom.


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## jazak (Feb 12, 2008)

I just had a situation last night where the neighbors across the street were outside actually on the street (about 7 adults). My 3, Max and Lilly, and myself were all sitting outside on our front porch. One of the kids, a little boy about 3 yo walks up into my yard, over to where Mad and Lilly were laying down, about 5 feet away from me, and kicked Max in the but, HARD!!! I told the boy no and ushered him to go back home, and out of 7 adult standing there not 1 said anything to this little boy!!!!! I was so angry, and to top it off they don't speak any english so I could not talk to the parents or the little boy about it!!!!


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## camfan (Oct 30, 2006)

QUOTE (Carrie @ Jul 21 2008, 12:49 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608812


> QUOTE (hambys97 @ Jul 21 2008, 11:40 AM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608800





> Unfortunately, you can't discipline your children at home either. It isn't because some parents don't want to, it is because kids are taught in school that if you are abused you should call and report this. Well, a child's understanding of "abused" is not the same. And you have children who threaten to call CPS (Child Protective Services). They are willing to exaggerate situations (as that is what kids do, not out of malice but it is simply something they do) and then where are you left. Going through a legal battle to prove that you weren't beating your children.
> 
> I have been told more than once by complete strangers that I have the nicest, polite children. I AM proud of that. But, I am also terrified alot of the time because of the way the laws are against parents. If my children are misbehaving in public, I should be able to take care of that in public. But, I can't. And then I have others looking at me thinking I am a horrid parent because I am not doing anything. My hands are tied. It isn't because I don't want to take care of my responsibility, I simply have no means to do it in certain situations. IMO.[/B]


EXACTLY, i completely agree with you here. i've had a few scares myself....the most recent was when i told my kids they weren't allowed the SNACK i bought them if they didn't straighten up when i picked them up from school. apparently someone felt the need to report me and all of a sudden the police showed up at my house and interviewed myself, my husband and my children! i was going to be brought up on neglect charges for withholding food from my children! WTH?! before that, the girl who used to live in the apartments around the corner was charged with neglect when she let her 6 year old son ride his bike in nothing but his under roos (no shirt, no shoes, no shorts, no helmet) after dark. the police were called and found the boy at the store parking lot at 10:30pm, filthy from head to toe. for some reason she thought i was the one who called (i wasn't even out at that time) so she called the police on me in retaliation. AND TOLD ME ABOUT IT AFTERWARD. said my kids were out doing what her kids were doing, said they were riding their bikes with no helmet and were filthy and unsupervised all the time. problem was, i had friends over that evening, it was 7pm and the police showed up, my kids were playing in the backyard with my friends kids and they were fully dressed, clean and accounted for (supervised). that was stated in the report. but my god, you have to be on the defense these days! i'm scared to death!

EDIT: and i want to say, i have extremely intelligent, well behaved, respectful children...they are complimented all the time. i am proud of my kids and i do everything in my power to make their lives better. that's what i do, i'm a mom.
[/B][/QUOTE]

I agree with you guys. When my siblings were little my parents were having an after church pot luck dinner. One of my sisters who was 3-ish at the time kept running outside following the bigger kids who were going in and out and she was going to get hurt. After this happened several time my step-dad told her that if she didn't cut it out he was going to give her a spank (swat on the butt). You have to know my stepdad--he is the most kind, gentle person that I know. Anyway, someone at the house that day ended up calling child protective services based on that comment that my stepdad made. It was a nightmare having them interview all our neighbors, teachers, etc. etc. Charges were dropped. But it was humiliating. I'm not sharing this to start a debate on spaking or not spanking (I personally didn't spank mine) but you can have your kids hauled away in a heartbeat if you're not careful. Yes, we need to protect our kids against abuse, but the social services can be so black and white and make a big deal out of nothing. That story always petrified me as to what I say and do with my kids--you have to be overly cautious not to say ANYTHING that will trigger false charges. With DSS you're guilty until proven innocent instead of vice versa.


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## 3Maltmom (May 23, 2005)

My brother, and SIL, had foster kids for years. They met with a counselor once a week.
Oh my, some of the "stories" they would tell. It got to the point no one wanted to visit
my brother's house anymore. We were afraid of what we would be accused of by the kids.

On the lighter side, I had CPS called on me a couple times. My son is grown, and lived
500-miles away. Get this, when my Cockatoo "sings", he sounds like a screaming child.
Yep, neighbors thought I was beating a kid ~ LOL

CPS actually went through my entire house. Looking for baby cups, clothes, toys, anything
to indicate I had a child. Then my Stevie Ray starts "singing". The CPS workers looked at 
each other, laughed, and apologized. I said, "that's cool, you're doing your job".

I must say I did ask Stevie Ray, "What took you so flippin' long to sing?" :HistericalSmiley:


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## domino_angel (Apr 17, 2008)

As a future social worker, I know that CPS workers get the worst treatment of all time. They are hated by all. To top it off they have to deal with a lot of BS from parents- both the innocent and otherwise. 
They are _required_ to thoroughly investigate EVERY single report. No exceptions. Yes, many times the reports end up being frivolous, but if they aren't, and weren't properly investigated, then what?? Someone loses their job, a child could end up hurt or worse! 

Also, if they know who gave a false report, those people could be in a heap of trouble. 

So, like the last person said, they are just doing their job. The real problem is false reports and exaggerated reporting.


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## hambys97 (Feb 25, 2005)

QUOTE (domino_angel @ Jul 21 2008, 02:18 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608865


> As a future social worker, I know that CPS workers get the worst treatment of all time. They are hated by all. To top it off they have to deal with a lot of BS from parents- both the innocent and otherwise.
> They are _required_ to thoroughly investigate EVERY single report. No exceptions. Yes, many times the reports end up being frivolous, but if they aren't, and weren't properly investigated, then what?? Someone loses their job, a child could end up hurt or worse!
> 
> Also, if they know who gave a false report, those people could be in a heap of trouble.
> ...


 I would never say that a social worker has an easy job. It is a crucial, grueling, under-paid job that doesn't provide enough staff for the load. I would also agree that they (like teachers, and I will state that I am NEITHER) have to put up with a lot of BS. But, I can understand the the innocent parent being upset with the process. Being a parent of not one, not two, but three children who are whole-hearted kids that like to play, rough-house, wrestle, etc., I will admit to swatting (lightly tapping behinds, never when I am angry) my children at times. I do NOT think that is abuse, and most of the time neither do my children. 
One of the problems is that children are being told that they can call and report their parents (without just cause). Children then know that they control their parents in this sense. I have had my (at the time) 4 year old tell me that she was going to tell her teacher (pre-school) that I didn't feed her, that I beat her, and make-up all this stuff because she thought that living with someone else would be better since I would not allow her to get a toy at the store.
Another problem is so many people who hear "frustrated" comments report it as happening (exaggerating their knowledge) but asking to remain anonymous (so they won't get in trouble later). I make "frustrated" comments all the time. I will joke with my children at times that I am going to sell them, or tell them off the wall stuff to aggravate them. I do this because I LOVE my children and I know that they enjoy being aggravated (if it isn't happening enough, they think they have done something wrong...LOL). But people who don't know me or my children simply hear one word or one phrase and all H#*) breaks loose.
Please don't get me wrong. I do agree that there are ALOT of parents who simply don't want to teach their kids anything (and probably should never have become parents to begin with). But, I would ask that so many who simply blame ALL parents not judge so quickly. The laws have been stacked against parents, and kids know that they can falsely accuse reeking havoc on everyone's lives. It isn't social workers that have caused the problem (for the most part, they have my utmost respect). But the over-reaching legally into parenting has CAUSED a big portion of the problem. IMO.


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## crow (Jul 20, 2008)

When we had our pizzeria up north, some of the kids that would come in w/ their parents were unbelievable. They would take drinks out of the cooler, ice cream, would leave their food(if they ate in) all over the tables/chairs, would spill drinks and the parents wouldn't pick it up...stuff like that.
As for where were are now, we moved back after my dh's heart attack and quad bypass so he could heal. When we lived here bf, kids would take fruit off our trees and throw it at our house or eat it...or throw it at each other. Would hang out in our tree(even found older kids up there getting high!)...would tease our dogs...you name it. 
My youngest daughter was out playing w/ some neighborhood kids a few months ago and these two brothers were hitting each other w/ sticks...and one got hurt and went to his dad and told him that my daughter did it. The dad came up and screamed at my daughter, even w/ me standing there telling him it wasn't her and he refused to believe me! 
One other kid slammed my son's head into a cupboard(yrs ago) and when the g-ma of this boy brought him home, she was upset bc she had to use one of her washcloths to control the bleeding! The kids dad came over a few days later and screamed at me calling me the worst word you can call a woman...bc he said his son was innocent even after his gma told us what he did. 
Another kid broke my daughters arm...even when the cops went to his door, his dad wouldn't wake up and he gave us grief!(and we live in a decent neighborhood...these kids just get away with everything!)

My kids are taught respect and to treat others well, so they were just shocked.

I have had CPS at my house, while up north. The reason being that my middle child(my daughter who has diabetes) was out sick....with hospital, surgeon and doctors notes...her principal claimed she had educational neglect! I had a tutor for her! (my daughter has had really bad complications from diabetes w/ heart, digestive, neurological, etc....)...and was in the hospital a lot bc they couldn't control her bgl's or everything else(she's supposedly insulin resistant)....
and the social worker was great...was polite, spoke to all of us, even went up to the pizzeria to talk to my husband. They found it unfounded, but her principal had us in w/ a meeting saying we should make her go to school(does he know what happens w/ DKA or lows?)...and for every week she completed a full week, give her a sticker and let her earn enough to get a "prize"(she was in 8th grade at this time). I was like, reward her for being healthy when it can't be controlled? He then banned her from the Valentine's Day dance bc she was in the hospital that week before.


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## coco (Sep 20, 2006)

> It seems kids have no respect now days and they usually learn it from their parents, when I see a family with well behaved children I always make a point to go over and thank them for teaching their children how to be respectful.
> 
> Same here. There's nothing like seeing a table in a restaurant with mannerly children.
> 
> I'm so over the ill-behaved kids wherever we go. If we go into a restaurant and see kids, we ask for a table somewhere far away from them. Whatever happened to babysitters? That's what we did when we went out when the kids were young. I love children, but there are just too many who don't have manners.


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## domino_angel (Apr 17, 2008)

I definitely agree that the law is over-reaching a bit. I know that people are allowed to be anonymous from the parents, and that is fine...but I think they should still have to identify themselves to CPS. I also think that CPS should advise the reporting party that they are breaking the law if they make (another) false report. I think that would cut it down a lot. 

More than that, there should be more public education on what is and is not child abuse. Spanking on the rear with a bare hand is not abuse (in my state). Using an implement (ie belt) IS considered abuse....etc etc. 

I also think that letting children be unruly, mean, and otherwise ill behaved (due to lack of discipline) should be considered child abuse! Offenders should be enrolled in parenting classes!


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## lillady (Jan 25, 2007)

OMG-I hear ya. I love kids, obviously, I'm having one...but a lot of parents don't scold their children at all. These days, you send your kid to your room and they have a tv, dvd player, cell phone, computer, you name it. When I went to my room-I had to be with my own thoughts.  

Just ask Linda (Bonnie's Mom)-remember this Linda? We were eating at a nice Chinese restaurant in NY and there was a toddler in a high seat at the table next to us. First of all, his parents let him drum on the table with a knife (yes knife) and fork forever! It was loud and annoying-I would NEVER let my kid get away with that-and to top it off-he threw the knife at someone walking by. Did the parents say anything to him? No! They didn't even pick up the knife! :shocked: I've even heard someone say they were turned into child services for putting their child in time out. Man, I remember my mom would spank us (not hard) but we had manners, that's for darn sure! :biggrin: 

Ok-I'm done rattling now


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## JessicaMO620 (Sep 18, 2006)

> > Whatever happened to babysitters? That's what we did when we went out when the kids were young.
> >
> >
> >
> > ...


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## mi_ku_5 (Jun 2, 2008)

QUOTE (Matilda's Mommy @ Jul 20 2008, 07:26 PM) index.php?act=findpost&pid=608571


> It seems kids have no respect now days and they usually learn it from their parents, when I see a family with well behaved children I always make a point to go over and thank them for teaching their children how to be respectful. I had 4 children and fostered two or three with mine, they new to be good and respect others, now they are grown and only one of my kids have respectful children. When I have my other grandkids I have to sit down and explain to them when they are disrespectful, they have gotten away with it and just don't think anything of it. By the time they leave grandma's they know they are not allowed to be that way with me. funny thing is they always beg to come stay with me. A little love goes along way[/B]


Good for you! My mom was a single parent and often overly permissive. My grandmother, however, expected us to be respectful. She was the master of the guilt trip. Even as an adult, all she had to do was tell me she was "dissapointed" or "expected more" for me and I was devastated. It was of the utmost importance to her that I thought about how my actions affected others. I'm 23 and I find it shocking how some kids act. I think there are places that children just don't belong. I think it's a parent's job to supervise their kids. I was a substitute teacher for a couple of years and was shocked at how many parents (most very young parents) disregarded their children. I think a big part of our society's problem is that people don't require enough out of themselves or their children.


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## Maxsmom (Aug 5, 2007)

I have 2 boys and if I knew of any goings on like that, they would feel my wrath! The Holy Bible states that a child (or children) that is left to his own will cause his mother shame. Is this not a prime example? No, you can't be with your children 24/7, but they should know how to act for those times that they are away from you. That's just my opinion. When my boys get out of elementary school they will be going to a Military Academy. They have to learn to be men of honor and it has to start now.

Peace and Love,


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## saltymalty (Sep 14, 2004)

I think a big part of the problem is that we expect our children to be little adults rather than kids...don't get me wrong...I agree that unruley children are no pleasure to be around. But I think a big part of the problem lies with the parents who put their children in situations they cannot handle. For instance, taking a young child out to a nice restaurant and then ignoring the child is a recipe for a tantrum...or taking a very tired child, or a child who may be teething...you get the idea. Kids need time to discover, learn and explore. They are going to make mistakes and it is our job as parents to teach them. Somewhere along the line, we stopped playing with our kids and have left them responsible for their own undirected learning experiences. We also put our kids under so much stress by overscheduling them in a million activities. I am sure those who are parents will agree, we have to make time for our kids, teach them right from wrong, and help them to become wonderful adults. Learning to respect people, rules, and themselves is a huge part of it.


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