# Shy puppy help!!!



## qtn2x (Nov 14, 2005)

Hi everybody, I am new here in the forum. I just recently got a puppy but he is so shy. I got him when he is 4 months old so I wonder if that's the reason for him being shy because I heard dogs who are older than 3 months old will have a harder time to adjust to a new family. Anyway, he is afraid of people holding him or approaching him. He would follow me around but when I turn around to try to pet him, he runs crazily away from me and hides in his crate. Same thing happens when I come home from, he would runs out to check out and wag his tail but would run away from me if I approach him. ANyone in here have experience with shy puppies? Will he grow out of it? How to socialize him right? How to gain his trust. How to make him become more confident? It's so hard for me to train him or socialize him becuz he is so scared of everything. I took him outside but he was too scared to even walk. He just stood in one place and shivered. What do I need to do? I want to enroll him in a puppy class but I am afraid he might be too shy for it. I want to train him too because I don't want him to start having bad habits. Please help!! Any input is appreciated.


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## maltlover (Feb 1, 2005)

> Hi everybody, I am new here in the forum. I just recently got a puppy but he is so shy. I got him when he is 4 months old so I wonder that's the reason for him being shy because I heard dogs who are older than 3 months old will have a harder time to adjust to a new family. ANyway, he is afraid of people holding him or approaching him. He would follow me around but when I turn around to try to pet him, he runs crazily away from me and hides in his crate. Same thing happens with when I come home, he would runs out to wag his tail but would run away from me if I approach him. ANyone in here have experience with shy puppies? Will he grow out of it? How to socialize him right? How to gain his confidence? It's so hard for me to train him or socialize him becuz he is so scared of everything. I took him outside but he was too scared to even walk. He just stood in one place and shivered. What do I need to do? I want to enroll him in a puppy class but afraid he might be too shy for it. I want to train him too because I don't want him to start having bad habits. Please help!! Any input is appreciated.[/B]


HI and welcome to the forum, from what i have read i would think that maybe he was hit or mistreated.. you never know, but as he learns to trust you it will get better dont worry just be patient... Im sorry for not being of such help but i know for sure other members will help u out, bcuz there the best


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

He may have not been abused. There are many reasons for a puppy to be shy. Abuse is only one of them. 
I have done alot of study on the subject, and have also had a shy pup. Unfortunately, when I had my shy pup there was no internet, so I didn't know too much. Now, I have the internet and a pretty confident pup, I don't know wich is worse. LOL. I have issues I am dealing with also, like over confidence and nipping.

Anyway, back to the shy pup. He can be shy because he was taken away from his mom and littermates too early. He also may not have been handled enough in his first few weeks/months of life. Human handling is very important to socializing them. So, now you have to just be a little more patient and give him time.

First and foremost, the most important person he needs to bond with is YOU. Don't worry about everyone else, right now. He needs to feel that you are his pack leader and you will keep him safe, secure and will provide for all his needs. The best way to bond is through food. That is the best thing. First try feeding him his kibble by hand. Even if it is one at a time, so be it. You can also entice him by offering a more tasty treat such as chedar cheese. He has to "work" for it, though. Meaning he has to come to you. He is already following you so, that is a good sign. He just has to learn that you are not going to hurt him. You have to win his trust. Once he stops being "hand shy" and lets you pet him...start giving him body massages where he learns to let you touch EVERY part of his body. This will set him up to getting used to grooming later on. Do not do anything that will cause discomfort of the slightest until he learns to trust you.

ie. The vet gave my Max his boosters while I was holding him. It took me 2 weeks to win back his trust...he was growling at me when I combed his butt area after the boosters for over a week. This is what I mean.

When I brought Max home, I brought him home in a carrier. He was scared all the way home and cried the whole way. When we got home, I put the puppy gate up in the kitchen (smallest room in the house) opened up the carrier on the floor and let him slowly sniff his way out. Once he sniffed around nervously in the first few minutes, he ended up JUMPING on me...I did not lay a finger on him till then. After I began to let him explore, then I gave him a kibble or two of his regular food as a treat. We hung out in the tiny kitchen for a good hour. It went really well. If your kitchen isn't that small, try the bathroom with just you and him. It's small enough to where he can't avoid you in there...that is the objective. Without touching him, let him sniff you out...you will know when it's ok to handle him. FOOD< FOOD FOOD....if he is a little hungry that would be even better.

Worry about puppy kindergarten a little later. It may be too much for him right now.

To socialize Max (he's been with me since the end of October) I take him almost everywhere with me. RUle of thumb is introduce them to one person per day so they have "good" and "safe" experiences with strangers and they learn that humans are fun. (my Max adores strangers now) New noises and new scents little by little. Do NOT coddle him if he gets scared...this will send a message that it is ok to be scared...and it will bring him attention. That isnt good.

Anyway, start with building trust with you first...then continue from there...after all once he trust you, he will trust that you will keep him safe.


Puppy social/play groups after he is happy with you as his mom.

As he builds his trust, you will be even more proud and touched.

Best of luck....we'll all be here for support.


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

p.s. -- when Max and I do our daily puppy socializing (with strangers) I always have him in my arms. I feel he won't be so overwhelmed with the SIZE of people that way. I only walk him on the lease for short walks around the block, that's it. Oh and the strangers we meet are mostly in or outside of stores. People see a pup and automatically want to say hello and/or hold him (adults only--he loves this).


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## Toby's Mom (May 7, 2004)

I got Toby at four months and he, in some ways, sounds like your little guy. 

Toby was, to the best of my knowledge, never hit prior to us getting him. I think Maltese are a bit timid to being with. We have never hit Toby but he does back away from us at times. For example, I will come in the door after having run errands and Toby is so excited to see me (tail wagging, jumping up and down, and crying), but when I bend down to pick him up, he cowers. Also, when I go to hook him up to his leash, he scoots away like he is afraid. Who knows why he does it, he just does. He will be two in a few days and has not outgrown it, so I have just accepted it as a part of his personality. 

I can tell you that Toby was nervous the first day or so that we got him, but who wouldn't be? After that, he really warmed up to my husband and I and he has been glued to us ever since. It may just take time for your guy; it may just be his personality.

Maybe to stop him from being so afraid, find a treat he just LOVES (I know Toby would do anything for dehydrated chicken breast) and then offer him a tiny piece before picking up. Also, you could have strangers offer him the treat to teach him that strangers are nothing to fear.

I'm sure others on here will be able to offer other suggestions. Good luck!


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

Maltese are such sensitive souls. 

When I first got Kallie she was frightened of kitchen noises and as soon as I opened the door to the cabinet that contained pots and pans she would run to her crate. 

But back to your problem.... I would just make sure to speak to him softly, sweetly and in a high pitch and not make any sudden moves toward him. His natural reaction is to back away. Get him to come to you by bribing with a favorite treat and then love on him and praise him so he will associate coming to you with something positive. Don't ever call him to you or pick him up and reprimand him. 

Even now, with mine, I am aware that I cannot come at them suddenly or speak too loudly to them. 

When he is following you and you turn around to pet him, he may not realize what you're going to do. It might come across as an aggressive motion to him. 

I would get on his level a lot. Sit on the floor and play with him. Do you all play at all now?

Also, I would try hand feeding him. I did that with K & C and my first Maltese, Rosebud, and I felt it was a very bonding experience. Plus I loved having their furry little mouths in my hand... so tickly and sweet.

Good luck and please keep us posted.


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## Deanna (Jan 14, 2005)

> I would get on his level a lot. Sit on the floor and play with him. Do you all play at all now?[/B]


This is what I was going to suggest. Wilson would cower a lot when we first got him- I made a point of sitting on my knees a lot- not making sudden movements toward him. When I would approach him I would speak softly and hold my hand out. Also, with putting his leash on him-- he used to cower when I would come towards him to click his leash on, so I make him jump up on the sofa- and he has to "stand" up with his front paws on the arm of the sofa. 

Another thing, I don't go to him- he always has to come to me. Part of that is establishing that I am the Alpha, and part of it is so he isn't confused as to what I am wanting from him. I think it helps define the situation for him. It is clear that I am calling him, and he is required to come to me. That he understands. I think if you suddenly turn around he isn't sure what you want or what you are going to do or where you are going- and it's confusing to him. 

Now the only time he cowers is when I am carrying something large and walking in his direction. And who can blame him! He is so tiny, and I am so tall carrying something sooooo much bigger than him. From his perspective it must look very scary.


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## qtn2x (Nov 14, 2005)

Thank you so much to all of you for your advice. THey are all very helpful. For the abuse possiblity, I don't think it's a case because i got him from a reputable breeder, the one that Charmypoo got her Sparkle from. SHe told me she has been very busy with her stuffs that she didn't have time to socialize this puppy. I think that's the main reason why he is shy. And I think I am expecting too much from him too soon. I just got him for a week. The thing is I already had a maltese before him and he was nothing like him. The other guy was all friendly and brave and came to anyone. That's why when I got this one, I am so overwhelmed by his shy behaviors. He wouldn't come to me or my parents at first. I think i have no problem establish trust with him as of for now ( after 1 week), he starts to get much better with me. He wants to sleep in bed with me, he lets me pet him (once in a while), we play with each other fine. The weird thing is one moment we could be playing and bonding and all but then the next moment (like I come downstair and go upstair again), he might be scared and run away. Same thing with petting, I can pet him one moment and next moment he might run away. I can call him to come to me 50% of the time. The other 50%, it's either my parents are with me or there are guests in the house. ANd when he is scared, no treat or anything can make him come. He would try to sniff the treat but then he legs are like nailed down to the floor. What I am trying to say is he is not consistently shy or consistently confident. That's why I don't know if I can classifly him as a shy dog or he is just shy because he is adapting to the new environment. I would love for him to come to my parents and treat my parents as his owners too. But he is still scared of them. 

ANyway, as for the handfeed him, right now I am leaving his food and water out for him so he can eat or drink whenever he wants. SHould I stop doing that and feed him on schedule? Again, thank you all for your thoughtful replies


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## LexiAndNikkisMom (Apr 13, 2004)

> Thank you so much to all of you for your advice. THey are all very helpful. I think I am expecting too much from him too soon. I just got him for a week. The thing is I already had a maltese before him and he was nothing like him. The other guy was all friendly and brave and came to anyone. That's why when I got this one, I am so overwhelmed by his shy behaviors. He wouldn't come to me or my parents. I think i have no problem establish trust with him as of for now ( 1 week), he starts to get much better with me. He wants to sleep in bed with me, he lets me pet him (once in a while), we play with each other fine. The weird thing is one moment we coulbe playing and bonding and all but then the next moment (like I come downstair and go upstair again), he might be scared and run away. Same thing with petting, I can pet him one moment and next moment he might run away. I can call him to come to me 50% of the time. What I am trying to say is he is not consistently shy or consistently confident. That's why I don't know if I can classifly him as a shy dog or he is just shy because he is adapting to the new environment. I would love for him to come to my parents and treat my parents as his owners too. But he is still scared of them.
> 
> ANyway, as for the handfeed him, right now I am leaving his food and water out for him so he can eat or drink whenever he wants. SHould I stop doing that and feed him on schedule? Again, thank you all for your thoughtful replies[/B]


For right now I would just worry about getting him to trust you. You have plenty of time to have him build a relationship with your parents. You can still free feed him but set aside some of his food and try sitting on the floor a few times a day and feed him some of the food. If after a week there is no improvement you can switch over to handfeeding all of the food.


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## Violet's Mom (Aug 3, 2005)

> HI and welcome to the forum, from what i have read i would think that maybe he was hit or mistreated.. you never know, but as he learns to trust you it will get better dont worry just be patient... Im sorry for not being of such help but i know for sure other members will help u out, bcuz there the best
> 
> 
> 
> ...


this was going to be my suggestion as well. the pup just needs to get use to you. i would definately cuddle him alot just to let him know that you love him.


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## angela923 (Nov 24, 2005)

My Pudding is shy too, only he's very attached to me and hides behind me when he sees strangers. It takes a while for him to come out from behind me to sniff the strangers. I think you just need to socialize him with people you can trust first that has patience. My friends come over and sit with Pudding for 30mins to an hour sometimes and give him treats and play with him. After a lot of this, he's a lot less scared of people now. Still won't let complete strangers pet him but at least he doesn't try to hide as much as he did before.
Good luck!


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## k/c mom (Oct 9, 2004)

> ANyway, as for the handfeed him, right now I am leaving his food and water out for him so he can eat or drink whenever he wants. SHould I stop doing that and feed him on schedule? Again, thank you all for your thoughtful replies[/B]


You don't have to necessarily hand feed him all of his food. Just take a portion of it out in the morning, perhaps, when he is hungry, and have him sit on your lap on the floor while you give him pieces of kibble.


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## Brinkley & Neyland's Mom (Jun 14, 2004)

Want my new crazy nut who is not afraid of ANYTHING to come over and bring him out of his shell?
















I feel for ya...that is one reason we picked this one over his brother. His brother hid under the bed and didn't come out hardly at all. This one was so much more outgoing.

Be patient...I am sure he will come around.
Just remember, you could be at the other end of the spectrum like me.


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## Scoobydoo (May 26, 2005)

I was also going to suggest sitting on the floor and just let him come to you, perhaps offering some of his food by hand.
If you could put yourself in his postition and imagine someone towering over you I think you would understand that this could be why he runs away. I am sure once you put yourself at his level and offer a few nice calm words of praise and some of his favorite treats or his kibble you might be pleasantly surprised.
I saw once on Animal Planet where some people were trying to capture a very frightened Rottie, and every time they attempted to approach him he would lash out at them with fear. Well this guy got down on his knee and didn't move, the dog eventually came to him and was very calm and relaxed and the guy said that if you tower over a dog that is afraid it will lash out in fear but if you make yourself as small as they are they relax and are no longer afraid. I think there is a lot of sense in that.


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

I would not just leave his food out for him....too easy for him to stay shy. He needs to know that it is his pack leader who is providing his food for him. I would do a few kibble by hand, when he is hungry and then put his dish down. Same in the evening. 

If he is not going for the treats all the time, find one he cant resist. That takes a little time. I taught Max to "sit" on command in 20 minutes using real cooked liver. I can't believe how quickly he would sit, after I initially pushed his hiney down and gave him a treat for it the first couple of times. For real food, wow! Biscuits he could take or leave. It's only certain human food they will work magic for you.









He can't always have his choice to run away, though. You need to pick him up, calm his nerves a bit, and gently rub his entire body while talking softly to him, then gently put him down. Do this for atleast ten minutes in the beginning. He has to be handled and he may not offer, you have to get him used to it....like everything else. As he learns it's enjoyable, and it is.....he will eventually come to you and roll on his back so you can rub his tummy. It took Max a little time before he started doing that. Also, when he relaxes EVERY muscle in his body in your lap and lets you do whatever you want to him...that takes a little time too...but, it will happen. Because dogs do what's most pleasureable or rewarding to themselves....that is the best thing I read from a certain trainer. Now, I always keep that in mind.


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## miko's mommy (Feb 8, 2005)

> Hi everybody, I am new here in the forum. I just recently got a puppy but he is so shy. I got him when he is 4 months old so I wonder if that's the reason for him being shy because I heard dogs who are older than 3 months old will have a harder time to adjust to a new family. Anyway, he is afraid of people holding him or approaching him. He would follow me around but when I turn around to try to pet him, he runs crazily away from me and hides in his crate. Same thing happens when I come home from, he would runs out to check out and wag his tail but would run away from me if I approach him. ANyone in here have experience with shy puppies? Will he grow out of it? How to socialize him right? How to gain his trust. How to make him become more confident? It's so hard for me to train him or socialize him becuz he is so scared of everything. I took him outside but he was too scared to even walk. He just stood in one place and shivered. What do I need to do? I want to enroll him in a puppy class but I am afraid he might be too shy for it. I want to train him too because I don't want him to start having bad habits. Please help!! Any input is appreciated.[/B]


We would love to see a picture of your puppy, I am sure he isa cutie! I don't know what to tell you since my dog has never been scared of anything. He has always been bossy, demanding and playful since we got him at 12 weeks old. I think maybe you should speak to a trainer? They may have some ideas on how to safely socialize him.


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## qtn2x (Nov 14, 2005)

> [We would love to see a picture of your puppy, I am sure he isa cutie!][/B]


I have to learn how to post pictures, i am new to this forum


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## MaxMommy (Nov 1, 2005)

For pictures, create a gallery somewhere, like here:
http://www.kodakgallery.com/Register.jsp?c...eid=51405758703

Put your pictures on it, then hit the little "tree" icon above --on this message tool bar and then add the image link and you can post your pics. The tool bar that appears when you are writing the post...where you can change the font and the color of the letters.

Anyway, almost the weekend where you can spend more time with your little timid pup.


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## LexiAndNikkisMom (Apr 13, 2004)

Posting Pictures in the SM Gallery 
Posting Pictures from Photobucket


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