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Old 08-09-2019, 09:24 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Name: Walter
Dog's Name: Casper (KR/AM Ch Great Master of Angela White KR) and (Forever in my heart) Lucky
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Default I was incredibly touched by the generousity

I want to thank you for the kindness you have shown. The wind chimes are gorgeous and the card coforting. I am also very touched by the donations that people have made to AMAR, NCMR, and Cornell vet research center in Lucky's memory. The donations to research and rescue will go on to help other animals find happiness and longer lives.


Brief update on me- time seems to be standing still right now. Although I really tried to celebrate Luck's life, I would still get brief moments of sadness and emptiness. In fact, I am a little tearful in writing this post. However, as each day passes I spend more time looking through pictures and videos and more and more I find myself smiling over his memories. This is the first time in my life that I have lived in a house without another being, so it is lonerly.


Unfortunately, I still do not have Luck's ashes. I am hoping that will bring me more closure. I received a call from Dr Burns who took care of Luck at Tufts in his final hours. She was incredibly sweet and empathic; she aso sent me a very kind sympathy card, as did my local vet.


And yes, I am thinking about bringing another little boy fluff into my life.



Thank you everyone.
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Old 08-09-2019, 10:18 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Walter , it breaks my heart to read your post as I so feel your pain. ❤️
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Old 08-09-2019, 10:34 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Walter, I'm just so sorry.
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Old 08-09-2019, 12:16 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Walter, grief is natural when we have loved deeply & lost the final battle! I am glad you are facing this "head-on" & working through it---it is the only way to get to the other side. It WILL take time & you will lose your composure in places that will surprise you. I remember after losing Bo I tried to put on a happy face but burst out in tears in an airport when I saw a little dog that reminded me so much of him. Apparently my grief was just below the surface of all the happy feelings. Grief is like that---it is not linear.

It makes me very happy to hear that you are considering bringing another little boy into your life.
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Old 08-09-2019, 12:52 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Walter, I am so sorry. I have always found the silence in the house very difficult.
It always feels to me that when we love them so much, especially when they have health issues that need extra care, when they are gone there is nowhere for all of that love and care to "land."
I am so glad that you are considering adding another little boy someday. You are such a great dad and any doggie would be very fortunate to share your life and home.
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Old 08-09-2019, 04:37 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kathleen View Post
Walter, I am so sorry. I have always found the silence in the house very difficult.
It always feels to me that when we love them so much, especially when they have health issues that need extra care, when they are gone there is nowhere for all of that love and care to "land."
I am so glad that you are considering adding another little boy someday. You are such a great dad and any doggie would be very fortunate to share your life and home.
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Old 08-09-2019, 10:47 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Walter it's so hard, especially when we spend so much time with our babies
Especially hard for you because you come home to a empty home, for me it was dressing Matilda I thought of her as my child I still do, just because they are fluffs doesn't make them less loved then a skin kid. I think it's like having a 3 or 4 year old, you feed them, bathe them, they spend time on your lap, they play and they sleep with you and look for you to care for them. They love you. So why wouldn't you be sad, why wouldn't you cry, why wouldn't your life be lonely, they mean everything to you and they don't grow up like skin kids, they live to please you, they need you as much as you need them, that's what makes it so gut wrenching when we have to let them go.
It's that unconditional love that helps you get through the grieving
I know God has the perfect little boy for you, it's all about God's timing
It took me 1 1/2 years to find my Geneva, she wasn't ready for me and my heart needed to be open to her, we are a perfect match
I think your going to have a little boy soon, I can't wait to meet him. Can I be his grammie like I am to little Lucky
We pray for you every day
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Old 08-10-2019, 09:27 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Walter, I know what you mean about silence in the house. In February 2008, when I lost my Samantha, I was alone for the first time in my life. Then in May of that year, Sweetness came into my life and there were paws to love and care for.



I hope that our actions show how much we as a fluff-family care about you and about Lucky. He will be in all of our hearts forever!
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Old 08-10-2019, 06:47 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I totally get it Walter. The silence... I just could not handle it. I literally just sobbed for days after Bella died. It destroyed my spirit when I could not save her. I kept trying to find some good in it, but everywhere I looked... I just missed her... and I missed being needed. That's when we decided to adopt Wilson and then a month or so later, Cooper. While I don't necessarily recommend getting 2 boys at nearly the same type (lol!) they have brought energy and joy back in to our home (well maybe not today when Cooper peed on my husbands shoe! LOL! ) , and I am so truly thankful for that. When our babies die, we are still left here with love to give. That silence was just begging for love to move throughout our home again. My soul was begging for that too. So while Bella will forever be my heart dog, Wilson and Cooper are my best pals. It's different and it's beautiful just the same. I pray when it is right for your soul, that God will bring you that same bit of comfort. Big hugs.

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Old 08-10-2019, 09:53 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Walter - whenever I think of you I think of Luck and what indeed a lucky boy he was having you as his dad. And I think of your big heart, caring and generosity. And I think that's part of why many were driven to also donate to rescues and to Cornell whom along with you saved Luck's life when he was so sick years ago. Both types of donations will help other pups who need it whether they are in distress or need a place to land.



And you know that I have my eye out for the perfect boy for you. For some reason MA gets a lot of Maltese into AMAR rescue, though some I've moved from CT and LI, because I've got some great foster families in MA. I like to feel I make perfect matches in all the rescues I place - whether I've fostered them or the foster families I work as a coordinator with - I don't just move the dog into any family. I look out for the best match. In fact we're meeting with Oliver's dad tomorrow at his home in VT. I hope you can be patient, as we all know it's a lifelong commitment but I think it won't take too long.
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